A Conversation for Ring/Ringu/The Ring: Contrasting the Novel to the Films

Peer Review: A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 1

Xwards

Entry: Ring by Koji Suzuki - A3906326
Author: Xwards - U1498258

What would I give to be able to read this novel in its original form? Unfortunalty my new years resolution to learn Japanese has only stretched to buying a Japanese version of Streetfighter II so far...


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 2

Mina

I've been wondering if I'd be able to buy this book in an English version, as I know there's often good bits of the novels that have to be left out.

I got a bit confused with some of the names in this - in one part you mention the names of the couple with their American counterparts (The protagonist in Ring is Asakawa, the 'Noah' character in the American film. His wife, Shizu (or Rachel)), then later you mention them as if they are two seperate couples (Shizu/Asakawa and Rachel/Noah) I realise this is just the way that I've read the sentance, but I think you should just mention the American names once if you want people who've only seen that version, then stick to the Japanese names for the rest of the entry.

I think the title might need adjusting - this has been written as a comparison between the American version of the movie and the book, rather than just a straight book review, so I think the title should reflect this.

Wonderful to read though. smiley - smiley


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 3

Xwards

Hello Mina and thank you kindly for the advice!

I agree with you on both points. With the names I probably haven't given the reader enough respect smiley - blush I think my problem was that I know much more about the Japanese thread of the story and I didn't want to fall prey to alienating anyone. Instead though it looks a bit untidy, doesn't it?

I wasn't sure about the title and I'm glad someone else has pointed it out. It was actually meant to be a straight review to begin with, but to get across the message of its uniqity in the legend I had to compare it with the films.

I'll do a little editing work when I get a spare sec.

Thanks again, Mina!


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 4

Mina

No problem! Post again when you make some changes, and I'll come back and have another look. It'll also bump the thread to the top of people's lists and the PR page as well, so you should get more comments.
I watched Ring 2 recently. Not nearly as spooky.


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 5

Apollyon - Grammar Fascist

This is quite a good entry. It describes and compares the books and movies well without giving away too much of the plot. I've never read/seen any of them, but after this entry, I want to!

I'd reccomend inserting a bit of GuideML. Specifically, put a at the start of each paragraph, and a at the end. Then put tags around the books title, like this: Ring. Finally, click where it says 'change style', then click on 'update entry.' This will unfortunately not work in the title of the entry.

I probably haven't explained that very well, so have a look here if you need some more help: A690518 .


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 6

Xwards

Hello Hussassan,

Thank you for the kind words and espeially the advice on GuideML! This is exactly the kind of assistance I was looking for; hoping , as I am, to learn from this experience as much as to contribute to it.

I was actually scared of the whole GuideML thing before your intervention, so kudos for the support!

I've updated the entry, with a few tweaks to the writing.

Thanks agains!


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 7

Xwards

Mina, I totally agree about Ring 2. The Japanese Ringu 2 took a bit of a divebomb from the original too; something I again out put down to lazy translation. I've got to learn Japanese and rectify these travesties!


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 8

Mina

It was the Japanese version I saw - I didn't know there was an American version of the second one. I haven't seen the American ones, there didn't seem to be any point!

This is looking really good! A couple of small typos -

If, however you are looking for something within the universe but taking a *differnt* path to the conclusion - different

Ryuji is an ambiguos character - ambiguous

He is as alien to Asawaka as he is the the reader - as he is to the reader

I've nothing else to comment on content now. smiley - biggrin

As it's in GuideML now, you'll be able to link to other entries. As this is intended for the Edited Guide, you can only link to other Edited entries.

Here's one to get you started

Stephen King - replace the name with Stephen King to turn it into a link.

You might be able to find a few more entries to link to - use the advances search and tick that you want to search only for Edited entries. You can sometimes get away with ticking 'Recommended entries' as well, in the hope that they will be edited by the time yours gets picked.



A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 9

Xwards

Ah, yes, typing. In the complex structure of my talents, vast and gothic like a terrible cathedral interlaced with miles of hidden tunnels, typing (despite years of experience) would be the dead bush withered outside the back gate... smiley - blush

Anyway, I've polished up the typos and added the link you suggested, yet another little gem of info I'm enourmously grateful for! smiley - cheers
Looking for other links, there didn't seem to be much I could fit in. I've added and entry to Great Horror Films, which has a good section on Ringu, but I had a little difficulty finding more relevant links. However, it wasn't a wasted search because it has given me a few ideas for more articles that (if I EVER get these essays out of the way smiley - flustered) I'd like to work on.

How does the piece look now?


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 10

Mina

Well, you don't need to capitalise Great Horror Movies, you can just leave it as normal text because it's part of a sentance and just happens to be a link as well.

I can't help thinking that it could do with some subheaders to break up the text a little, but I'm not sure that is essential.

It's looking fab!


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 11

Gnomon - time to move on

I think a few headers might break the text up nicely. It would also focus the entry better.

This entry is not about the novel but about an American translation of the novel. This is not made clear. I find it odd that you speculate about what the original novel must be like. This seems out of place here, in what is supposed to be a Guide to Everything. If you don't know what the Japanese version is like, you should not mention it, in my opinion.

I don't understand the term 'blank video'. To me a blank video is one with nothing recorded on it. In this case, how can he watch it? Do you mean a video with no label?

There are a few typos:

collegue --> colleague
happenens --> happens
americanised --> Americanised

The last sentence should be reworded slightly:

in America by Vertical and Kadowaka Shoten in Japan
-->
in America by Vertical and in Japan by Kadowaka Shoten.

Note the full stop at the end.


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 12

Xwards

Thanks Mina!

I like the suggestion about headers, I've seen these on other entries and I agree it will break up the piece nicely.

I'm going to have a think about it and do some editing work later on.

Thanks again!


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 13

Xwards

Hello Gnomon,

Thank you for the suggestions on the piece!

Do you think mentioning the Japanese original puts too much of a taste of opinion into the article? I don't want to loose the original novel as a whole - if only because it is the kernel of the saga - do you think I could just make a more subjective reference to it, maybe as a footnote?

I see what you mean about the translation aspect too. Perhaps if I add something into the introduction it will tighten that up a bit?

I agree I've used the term 'blank video' too colloquially smiley - blush. I'll rework that in a more general sense of blank video tape.

Thanks for the grammer and spelling tips too!


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 14

Xwards

Hello Gnomon,

Thank you for the suggestions on the piece!

Do you think mentioning the Japanese original puts too much of a taste of opinion into the article? I don't want to loose the original novel as a whole - if only because it is the kernel of the saga - do you think I could just make a more subjective reference to it, maybe as a footnote?

I see what you mean about the translation aspect too. Perhaps if I add something into the introduction it will tighten that up a bit?

I agree I've used the term 'blank video' too colloquially smiley - blush. I'll rework that in a more general sense of unlabelled video cassette.

Thanks for the grammer and spelling tips too!


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 15

DrMatt

Xwards, are you still around? It would be a shame to let this Entry fall into disrepair... I've only seen the first American film, but now want to track down the novels!

Anyway, it doesn't really deserve to be RIGHT at the bottom of the last page of PR.

Matt


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 16

Tony2Times/Prof. Chaos

Hey hey, nice to see someone talking about novels as well as films smiley - smiley though if truth be told I've only seen the films, Ringu and Ringu 2 and then The Ring, only the first in this list is worth watching IMO, only the first few minutes to Ringu 2 is decent, but would be better of as an epilogue to the first, where we discover the length of Sadako's time in the well.

Anyway, penultimate paragraph, 3 lines up you say "is is" rather than it is, just an excuse really to ask you if you'd post to me the meaning behind the title, unless it will ruin the book, but if its related to both novel and film I'll be ok with it, message to me on my space if thats ok. And yeah, change the grammer too :p

Also think you could do well with a bit of subheaders etc. I know GuideML is scary to look at but once you get your head around the basics you start to feel proud :D


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 17

Silverfish

It looks like Xwards has elvised (last posting April 21st), so I propose a move to the flea market. Any seconds?


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 18

Tony2Times/Prof. Chaos

I second that, clearly Elvised, shame I wanted to know the answer to my question.

Best to put it in the flea market or back to entry?


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 19

Mina

If the author has gone, then I'd be happy to make the changes and get it into the Guide, so it doesn't matter where it goes, I'll be creating a new copy. smiley - winkeye


A3906326 - Ring by Koji Suzuki

Post 20

Silverfish

I've proposed a move to the flea market, so will you second Mina?


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