h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I won't be coming. I know I'm not on the official list, but thought I should clear things up a bit though with B not coming and all you'd probably worked that out already.

It's not just him not going, but that I need to be this end so that I can shoot early on Sunday morning providing that the club has finally settled on a date.

HOpe you all have a good weekend.

Thanks for letting us know. And don't be so sure B ain't coming, a steady pestering campaign has already begun

Well if you'd like to kidnap him for the weekend I'll provide an address and leave the front door open for you.

He's not moved very far for the last few days though so I don't know how far you'll get him.

Ah, but that's the last few days. It's only Thursday, and the threat of GD, The Nagus, Bruce and me turning up at RoW on Friday evening should convince him to appear of his own volition.

*makes note to be around to witness this*

Should be an entertaining Friday night then. At the moment he's stubbornly saying that he doesn't want to go and get ratted for the weekend. However once he starts eating again he might change his mind.

Hey, getting ratted is not complusory, you know. Soberity is permitted.

Well whatever.

If you want directions/address just ask.

Um, is the street name a combination of two words, one which means 'small river', and the other meaning 'opposite of the start'? If so, I have the adress...

That's the one. You'll find us.

Right, so tell 'im he's got two choices: A) Get some Beechams Plus and chicken soup down his neck, and get his own arse up on either Friday night or Saturday morning, B) we come and get him...

Option A means we'll be nice and gentle, will be sympathetic, impressed that he came, and will permit moderate drinking or abstinence. Option B, well...

Do as you like, you can fight it out between you. However if someone bangs on the door it will be opened.

Perhaps you ought to drop him a warning message first though.....

You're enjoying this, aren't you?

I have already warned him that a kidnapping is on the cards. I'll go and reiterate though.

How did you guess?

From a personality point of view this could be very interesting, after all you both seem to be equally stubborn and I'm wondering how far this will go....

However please treat him with a bit of care, I don't want him broken and he has been properly ill. The house has been very quiet and when he stops talking and refuses to eat then something is wrong.

Ah, I'm not arguing that he's been ill. I'm arguing that after a week he should be up to a bit of light socialising. Can't have him festing in his pit for too long, now can we? Doctors recommend fresh air and changes of scenery .

Right you are then. This is for the pair of you to sort out now.

What is B, a man or a mouse! If theres kidnapping on the books I've a pair of you could borrow

If he's refusing cheese, then he's probably not either at the moment. Which begs the question: what is he?