h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I know - let's put a parr code on it..... ah ha ha ha ha...

*chokes on beer and sprays it over the counter and most of the clientele*

Oopsh, shorry everyone.

*ptui!*

Got a cloth, Lil? I'll wipe up. Gosh, what an impression for a new boy to make. Erm...let me buy you all a drink to make up for it...

*crowds of people suddenly emerge from the shadows*

Uh oh.

Well there, offering to buy everyone two drinks . I'll go and get myself a beer and a chaser to go with it.
Thank you kindly sir.

*puts out glasses for bartender*

*begins to consume his two drinks*

*enters*
I was just working across the way and I heard someone offer to buy a round. A pint of oil with a rocket fuel chaser please.

Hey Androyd... me believes the sign upstairs at the grin has a couple of bulbs fused!!!

*hates washing androyd's glasses*

*ducks behind bar and re-emerges with a handful of bulbs*
Sorry boss, got carried away with the Junk Shop. There's so much out there once you start looking.
*Exits, sounds of bulbs popping, a crackling noise and a flash. A smell of scorched metal fills the bar...re-enters with slightly blackened fingers*
Ahh its so much more fun when you keep the current ON. Lil, isn't the dishwasher working?

No, we never got it working. We've been handwashing everything.

*produces assortment of screwdrivers, spanners and blowtorches*
Lead me to it Lil.

Broken appliance, eh? What brand did you go with?

Win98 SE.

They're trying to split up Microsoft so dishwashers will be a separate company.

Well it is secondhand with the intials BG scratched in it. Perhaps it was used for laundering profits
*disappears behind bar, sounds of banging and crashing, reappears holding a small cog*
Hmm, that seems to be the problem, I'll check the junk shop and see if I can find a replacement.
*Exits*

*continues to wash glasses manually*

*Reappears clutching small cog*
I knew I'd seen one like that. Had to strip down an old Norton COmmando - yes it still is true that British bikes are the best, if you can find any.
* Disappears behind bar, more banging, whirring, a thin whiff of blue smoke*
Sorted Lil.

OK, thanks. If we ever get any customers to make dirty glasses, I'll try it out.

Oh! I can dirty a glass!

*grabbing a glass from nearby, Dan goes outside and fills it with dirt*

Try it out now.

Only a man would consider running a dishwasher with only one glass in it.

How about we find Greebo and shove her in as well.......she needs a wash!