h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: How To Grow Your Own Cigars - A25677309
Author: SWL™ ' - U1775547

I'd appreciate the feedback from any gardeners as I certainly do not have green fingers.

What a brilliant Entry I never knew that this was possible in the UK.

A small question. In the last paragraph, should it be 'Duty' or 'duty'? The HMRC letter implies the latter.

<> I would have put a comma after 'overnight'.

Again, well done SWL

I'm not sure if it's 'Duty' or 'duty' to be honest.

Why did I know this would be you, SWL?

Another goody, as ever. A couple of bits and a question or two (can't find much else wrong )

Under Drying

dry them then cure them. ---> either comma after them or 'and'

Just a thought, but can you not dry them in batches in an airing cupboard, or would that not work as well?

Under Rolling your Cigars

at a low heat for about 45 minutes. ---> How low? It's lowest setting or slightly higher - we need to know

Why do you need a former? Have you not already 'formed' most of your cigar beforehand?

btw I smoke hand-rolled ciggies (however, they are not rolled on the thighs of nubile Cuban women )

Changes and additional explanations added.

I've always been dubious about the idea of hand-rolled on the thighs of nubile Cuban women. For a start, you need a large flat area so I shudder to think of the legs that large, flat thighs are attached to.

Entry!

However I'd say the title needs rephrasing: it's not really the cigars which you grow after all.

Oh, and you could link to your potato Entry, since tobacco and potato are related plants (both are Solanaceae apparently).

The duty thing is duty with a little 'd'.

Thanks chaps That's allowed me to introduce a little levity into the piece.

We'll see how long it's allowed to stay in

Ok,

More clarification required (at least from me )

Under Growing Tobacco

The British climate is ideal for growing tobacco, if you avoid the frosts. --> can you just throw a horticultural fleece over the plant , or is it the roots that are frost sensitive?

For a good Havana cigar you will not surprisingly need Havana seeds. --> ...not, surprisingly, need...

Under Transplantation

What if you *don't* have a greenhouse? Would a coldframe do in certain areas of the world? would you need to build one? Would closed-end cloches do?

Under Planting

especially loose and sandy soils but if you have a lot of clay in the plot, ---> comma after soils and also after but

by mixing in some peat. --> some sand also?

Under Forming

That former thing makes more sense now

Under Rolling Your Cigars

about the same temperature as you'd use for warming plates before a meal -->Once again

Still a damned fine read.

Super entry, perfect title.

Question: Is the comparison of the EU to the Borg deliberate?? Seems a little bit harsh on EU expansion policy... certainly made me laugh though... problem being the Borg link isn't to an edited entry, so you can't leave it in probably...

Whoa, to much ellipsis vp

Curses!! You spotted it

Changes made to some of the grammar, clarifications made and ongoing linking is... ongoing.

Sensual indeed...

I liked the leeches though

Have you actually done this? I don't think you have. The reason I say this is because you'd have mentioned that the species of tobacco plant to grow is Nicotiana tabacum, but most commercial seed companies in the UK offer only either N. alata/affinis or N. sylvestris (both of which I have grown). You could probably get away with N. sylvestris as it has huge leaves but you'd get tiny and really crap cigars from N. alata.

No I haven't FM, thanks for the info. I'll update it later. Any other tips?

Interesting read

I didn't understand the Ministry of Thievery link though - perhaps it's a UK thing?

He is refering to our Chancellor and the Treasury Dept..

How's this one coming swl?

"How's this one coming swl?" Very well, by the looks of things.

Just a few points:

Drying last sentence: [leaves]

Making A Former 1st line: [While]

Making A Former 1st line: [While]

Rolling Your Cigars 2nd line: (to hand in case it is a little too dry.)?

Rolling Your Cigars 2nd para 5th line: [while]

Legal Note 2nd para 1st line: The linked Entry is not an Edited Guide Entry so it's highly unlikely to be acceptable. There is, however, an Entry that ends with a section on The Borg: 'Cyborgs in Science Fiction A1113788 (Edited)' - What do you reckon?




Legal Note last line: The '2' goes before the full stop.

Finished SWL or are you still working on this one?