h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The Library is filled with very tall bookcases with magically locked glass doors. A round red-marble table is in the center of the room, with sofas and chairs by the walls. On a raised platform is a desk with carved deamon faces. Behind the desk is a stained glass window that reaches the ceiling. In the center of the window is a black bad with a gold D on it. Heavy brass chandeleres hang from the cathedral-like ceiling.

*When we last left out heros...*

*Curmanis followed Polonius into the Library*

[Curmanis] Polonius, just because you are the leader of this party, does not mean you can treat us all like peasants.

*Polonius swings the candlestick around and brings it down on Curmanis' head*

[Polonius] Do not speak unless spoken to!

*follows his master into the Library and cringes at Polonius's harshness w/ his master*

*As silently as possible, attempts to open one of the sealed book cases*

*the apprentice is given a powerful electric shock from touching the handles*

Get away from there!

*Tiamat is thrown against the wall by the shock*

sorry

*Tiamat rubs his hands together, trying to get that rescently shocked feeling from it. Tiamat looks around and finds a scroll sitting on a small table in the corner. Tiamat sits down in a nearby chair and begins to read it.*

*it is a funeral invitation:*
"Dearest Friends and Family
Please join us in a Memorial Service for
The Late Baron Freder DuBois
To be held at Midnight
Saturday, December 13, 1092
At the Family Estate
PS Please do not bring wands or weapons.
Bells will be checked at the door.
*the post-script appears to be hand-written, and the letter seems to be flecked with dried blood*

Polonius that is enough! I am of higher position of who in the guild, so remember who you are talking to!

*reverently sets the scroll back down, digs in the cushion of the chair and finds a medalion. Slides it into his pocket, to examine later.*

I suggest you back down, peasant. I am the Baron Dubois, lord of the regeon from the mountains to the river, and the most powerful necromancer in the country.

*moves to his desk and sits down*

*an explosion of flames emits from the marble table*

*as the flames die down, a two-headed serpant with a firey tail prepares to strike Curmanis*

*sensing something is not right, and the serpent behind him, Curmanis pretends to be cowering with fear*

I's sorry sir, i's just wond'ing what date it was, sir.

It is 444 AP, the year of my Daughter's wedding. From the looks of the house, I'd say it was quite a bash. *face softens a bit* My girls threw quite a party they did. Shame I slept through it, but then again, who wants an ol' fart like me around? No, I'm just happy that Patty is finally married to a fine necromancer of noble stock. She may surpass me yet with her Guild training, and imagine the power her children will have!

*waves a hand and the serpent is banished to the realm of the dead*

*wonders what in the names of the gods is going on and decides it's safer not to ask*

......*thinks about it. Decides he likes remaining concious better*

<>

*muttering to himself* 444 AP? Thats over 150 years ago.

~~~Tiamat, it would be best if you did not say anything at the moment~~~

*out loud* Sir? Whats is yours lil' girls name, sir?

*Tiamat nods once, tighly, barely moving his head, and remains silent*

My baby girl is Frederique, she's just been engaged to a wealthy and powerful necromancer from the Eastern Lands who returned from the Magician's Guild accompanying my eldest daughter Patricia, who is engaged, if not already married to, her cousin Dagron Hapt.
Strange that Hapt did not return, but Patty assures me that he is coming as soon as he can secure a house in Imardin befitting the daughter of a Baron. Oh, what a joy that boy is.

*leans back in the chair, and turns to the window*

What a lovely night it is! I can't remember when last I was in such a pleasant mood!

*the storm has passed, and it is clearly day outside*