h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[Kraken II]: "Okay. Lead on then. I shall follow behind you with this chestin tow."
*hoists it*

: http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/brunel/F1782722?thread=407033&post=41184676#p41184676 Here comes... 'Professor' Kraken (the second)... of demonology. I need to have him collab with a necromancer to give a guest lecture. Or at least, he is writing a book on it, and he could use some help and advice on it. You know, & whatnot.

*Elwyn gazes around* and this is the library

there's a help desk

implying ...

I know nothing


books

: I've decided. For demonology,- mages taking it get their very own pet imp to work with. It breaks down into what class of magician they are, for the first few units. You get to learn how to combat hostile ones... and how to seek the help or advice from not so hostile kinds. Among... other things. Wua-Hahahaha. :P

*Comes back in to fetch the second chest he had brought with him on getting there*

[Kraken II]: "Don't say that. You probably know plenty. I'm going to negotiate having some after class hours. If you decide to take demonology and have any questions about how to raise an imp for combat,- then please feel free. Didn't you wonder about why it was that my other chest rattled?"

*To demonstrate, he picks up the other chest and sets it down.*
For a few moments nothing seemed to happen.

then, it seemed all that the box was made of to keep it from breaking apart into separate planks.

"They're a bit feisty at first. Don't like to travel in boxes. Too hard to keep track of a large number at once and over a long distance otherwise."

...
"I tell you what. If you help me with finding a necromancy teacher and/or a care-taker to help me come up with a lesson plan, you can have first pick of which imp you would like to use."

. . .
"Then later on for a report... you have to classify it. Or him. Or her. Depends on which variety. Which you will find out about... soon enough."
*Does an evil-laugh about writing up a test and there is fire in his eyes.*

"Er..." *Raises an eyebrow*
"A professor is supposed to do an evil laugh before writing up an exam, isn't he? I'm probably not doing it right. There will be time to learn that one soon enough."

*Replaces it with a hearty laugh instead, and feels much better about it.*

"Ah ha. Ha hah."
*Picks up the other chest and heads back into the library.*