h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I've got this problem, see? There's this guy, see? And I need you to track him down and follow him around for me, see? The thing is, I'm giving the Aroma Café's resident artist (Asteroid Lil) help with this Aroma Café float, see? She's brilliant, see? And she's got a great talent, see? She's got the float all finished, see? Except she had this list, see? A list of the regulars she wanted to depict graphically on the float, see? Instead of just listin' their names underneath the float, see? And she's got 'em all, she's got:
bluDragon,
Anonymouse,
Bluebottle,
Demon Drawer,
Greebo T. Cat,
Garius Lupus,
Herself (I think)
and Myself

But she wanted one more guy, see? She wanted to put this guy on the float, but she don't know what he looks like, see? So I need to know a bit about him, see? And his own preferences, see? I gotta know what he'd like to look like on the float, see?

So can you follow him for me? His name is Afgncaap5, and I think you know 'im. Get me all the info you can, and I'll pay ya well. Alls you can drink and eat at the Aroma Café!

~Irving

All I can eat and drink? That's almost as good a paycheck as they're giving me for the case at Joanna's!

Well, lemme pull up the file.

*Rifles*

Okay, according to this, his name is an acronym, and none of the letters represent him in any way Ageless, faceless, gender-neutral, culturally ambiguous adventure person. Okay, so we can logically rule out the first six letters . . .

He's an adventurer, and generally wears either an adventurer's get up, or an enchanter's robe. He'd probably prefer a blue vest and fedorra, some boots (almost any kind), a scabbard for a sword, and maybe a cape. I mean, this is a big event.

Oh, I almost forgot: he wears glasses, has brownish hair, you get the idea.

Well, I plan on picking up my paycheck any time now. Pleasure doing buisiness with you.

And with you. Glad I didn't have to wait around too long (I realize you're a busy man).

And anytime you need a drink, just stop by

~Irving

PS-- I'm going to start serving Joanna's doughnuts at my café. She only gives me small orders (so that people will still visit her stall), so maybe I should set some aside for you as part of your payment for the rush job...

*A shade passes in front of the window, and slips a mysterious message under the door*

You are cordially invited to visit Asteroid Lil's completed, full resolution version of the Aroma Café Float at http://www.h2g2.com/A283510
The picture on this page is somewhat large, as you will see. Actually, huge would be a better word. It may take a while to load, and you WILL have to scroll sideways and down to see the full picture, or indeed, anyone. But the art, IMHO, is amazing.

~Irving