h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Sssh! Don't mention "vets" around here as it may upset a certain cat....

I wanna be a vet.
does that mean that Greebo won't like me 'nemore?

*silversolstice trills a song from Cirque du Soleil's Saltimbanco (hey, it's virtual reality, I can be a good soprano if I want), but stops abruptly when she spies crackers*

YUUMMM!

*grabs handful of crackers and begins sucking all salt off them*

Hey, Londoners, I saw y'all's river of fire on CNN last night...it was bootiful...isn't it hilarious that, after all that fuss, nothing happened with y2k?

*looks out window and gasps*

Oh, my, I've always wanted to fly

Weeee.....

*wanders over to the hangover milkshake machine and despenses himself a large one*

Whahay get it? Large one .. oh dear, Ive been watching too much Blackadder...

Happy New Age Everyone!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You survived then.

Does he sound as though he's survived? He thinks he's on a "Black Adder" set.....

There, there! Come to Nursie dearie!

I said survived, I said nothing about being unscathed.

*Beeblefish's eyes glaze over -- he starts singing*

See the Little Goblin!
See his little feet!
See his little nosie-wose!
Isnt the Goblin Sweet -- ?

~Greebo grins wickedly~

See the little Goblin
He doesn't see Greebos paw
She hits him hard upon the nose
And now it's red a sore....

~Yet another wicked grin~

Greebo went to London
She wanted to see the Dome
But she had no ticket given her
So on Queenie's head she made her home

They thought Queenie's fur hat was brilliant
It became the talk of the town
Up until the moment
When Greebo got tired and jumped down

Queenie up and fainted
And lay flat out on the floor
Everyone stared in shocked surprise
As Greebo legged it out the door....

Arrives from the mists of cyberspace when the coast seems clear of Y2K danger and has a quick squiz of the partys progress thus far... Reaches into an inner pocket and brings out a radio mike...

Well, people, I am not intending to turn this into yet another karaoke thread on h2g2... honestly !!!

21ST CENTURY SCHIZOID MAN

Cat's foot iron claw
Neuro-surgeons scream for more
At paranoia's poison door
Twenty first century schizoid man.

Blood rack barbed wire
Politicians' funeral pyre
Innocents raped with napalm fire
Twenty first century schizoid man.

Death seed blind man's greed
Poets' starving children bleed
Nothing he's got he really needs
Twenty first century schizoid man.

-King Crimson 1974

:^)#

Ouch! (Gwennie removed cheese from her ears....)

Very tuneful, dearie!

Greebo! I thought Queenie's hat looked like it was made of cat fur! My, you do get everywhere, don't you?

Come to Nursie, Beeblefish and let me fix your nose before people think you're Rudolf the red nosed...... No, put Nathaniel's spike down as I don't think Greebo wants to sit on it......

Ohhhhh... ~grin~... is that anyway to treat a lady???

*Peregrin comes shooting through a window, smashing a delicately balanced arrangement of whiskey bottles, ricochets off a wall, and lands in a pile of doughnuts*

Sorry about that... it's just that the flying party is extremely erratic in its movement and not terribly easy to land on...
*Peregrin grabs a bottle of something random and downs it*
Anyway, just popped in for a drink. I'm going on a holiday somewhere (I haven't decided yet) for the next fortnight. See ya'all later.

Oh, by the way Greebo, you might want to collect some heavy artillery. The doughnut factories have heard about the flying party and have installed anti-party missile launchers.

Byyeee....
*Peregrin flaps out of the broken window*

Anti-party missile launchers!!!!

Oh deary me... what are we to do??? ~Greebo stares in horror at what could be her last pile of doughnuts... that are now covered in feathers~ ... What is to become of me????

*Screams and runs in, sword above head. Slams down on missile, throwing him up high. Lands on the second, quick pierce through the middle. Grabs party plate, and throws at missile. Missile explodes in a ball of light. Runs to final missile and, giving the ultimate scrifice...





















Eats it.*
That was fun. What now?

Errrrrrmmm, doughnuts all round.

Do we have any chocolate iced? Those are my favorite.

silversolstice

Yes, lots but they're Greebo's "stash" and she's usually generous but you'd better check with her first or she'll scratch your nose!

Hmm , now if Greebo happens to be a quantum cat , she should be able to bypass the anti party artillery . After all it only takes disappearing in one place and reappearing in another , quantum tunneling .

If Greebo is a quantum cat, she can be in multiple universes at once. Imagine the possibilities!