h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

*Khan puts away her crossword puzzle long enough to look down*

[Khan] Hellooooo down there. What do YOU want?

To play with the tank, of course.

[Khan] Nobody, and I MEAN NOBODY gets to touch the tank until they sign these release forms in triplicate and give proper notification to next of kin and-- heyyy... I KNOW you... you're that Corrupt thief!

*Camera pans way back to the Supply Warehouse at Mayhem, Inc., where fading Wanted posters of Corrupt and Kudos line the walls. Cameras return*

[Khan] Give me ONE good reason I shouldn't blast you, miss dances with trees! (Y'got some leaves stuck over there...)

*Corrupt annoyedly brushes the leaves out of her hair, then grins up at Khan.*

Your intel must be a little out of date, then; I have an agreement with NYC about reselling a certain percentage of his shop. However, if you see Kudos sneaking about, feel free to 'greet' him with whatever you feel appropriate.

In the meantime, I'd like to play around with the tank. And here's my STUMPED card in lieu of said release forms.

*flashes STUMPED card, which proudly proclaims 'Creating havoc and mayhem in the World of h2g2 since August 11, 2000'*

[Persephone at that moment happens to step out of a side door. Simultaneously, the Merovingian arrives through the double-doors (which for a moment open out to the kitchens of the French Restaurant]

[Merovingian] [ignoring the tank] Persephone, you [starts swearing at her in French]

[Oh, and I forgot to mention -- Merv's flanked by all the other guard programs As Seen In Reloaded.]

[Khan] Looks like you got company, STUMPED-girl; hope you can hold your breath!

*Khan retreats back into the hatch. The six tear-gas launchers on the sides of the tank all shift slightly*

*Wanders back in*

*notices the new arrivals*

*JJ's CHOPPERS Holophone trills gently*

Hello JJ crrkkkkkshhh ............... n the dungeon skrrllllll ...... soddit .......

Dungeon, eh?

*Leaves the assembles party, and heads off to the dungeons*

*Corrupt coughs and cries her way outside, through the convenient hole that the Mayhem tank had broken in the wall.*

*A few sobs later, a fireball blasts through toward the tank...*

[The Merovingian et al start all swearing from the tear gas, and then all run out again. Persephone also vanished while no one was looking.]

*The fireball impacts the tank, engulfing the external gas tank and rendering the whole thing a giant, smokey hulk. 'Soon as the tear gar disappated, Khan kicks open the hatch, coughing, making her way out to the courtyard*

*Corrupt walks in and looks around, a little pleased, a little anxious. She hides in the smoldering hulk, just to be sure that things work out pleasantly... for her, at least. *

*Corrupt finds the tank very hot to the touch, and the inside doesn't look too palatable, either. Having found nobody outside, Khan meanders back in*

[Khan] *mutter, mutter* -fireball- *mutter* -SO gonna get it- *mutter* -if I find her...

*Corrupt slips into the shadows and tiptoes around, hoping that she can get by Khan just as easily this way...*

*Khan looks around and huffs*

[Khan] So you're gonna make this difficult, huh? Huh?!

*Khan stomps over to the tank and jumps down the hatch. A moment later she climbs out and, brushing off her former compatriots, dons a slightly melted set of heat sensitive goggles*

Eep.

*Corrupt dashes out the hole in the wall*

*Just then, three Mayhem, Inc. henchmen come in the double doors, complete with heavy-duty self-propelled crane. They begin winching the tank carcass to the construction equipment. Khan ignores them and runs out the hole in the wall. One of the henchmen walks in the direction of the dungeon*

*Corrupt observes the scene for half a second, then gets behind the wheel of one of the Mayhem trucks. She then tears off down the road, attracted to the freeway like a magnet, or rather, like any mad Californian driver is. Especially the SoCali ones.*

*It is immediately apparent from the manner of said driving that her licence was recieved during Governor Ahhnold's term. Either that, or she took lessons from NYC Student. In any case, fire hydrants and innocent bystanders part like the Red Sea in her wake, or get flattened. Corrupt's choice... *