Speed 2

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Sorry, despite the misleading title, no Sandra Bullocks were harmed during the making of this report.

I feel the need for speed!

The concept of speed dating is based on 'efficiency'. In the past there were various ways to meet That Special Someone. You could spend your Friday and Saturday evenings drunkenly eyeing up potential suitors in a club, only to discover later that they are married/gay/drunker than you. Or you could trawl personal ads in the press, trying to decipher GSOH and ACA, and having to translate the euphemistic terms such as 'cuddly1' or 'funloving2'. Or get your
mates to set you up on a blind date, where you have a couple of hours of excruciating small talk with someone that you know straight away isn't your type.

Well now there's a new improved way to meet dates! A room full of people of the opposite sex, all single, all looking for a partner, all
compelled to talk to you for a short time, and able to decide 'Yes', 'No' or 'Maybe' in secrecy. All in one fun-filled evening.

So much for the theory! What happened?

Well there I was, first of the females to arrive (I'm pathologically early) so I was rewarded with letter A. The guys were given numbers from 1 to 23. We sat down where we chose (I met a really nice girl who lives just down the road from me!) while cocktails were served and the
local radio DJ explained the concept. And then we were off - 3 minutes with each guy, after which the compere would madly dash around ringing his little bell trying to get the guys to move on to the next table.


Since this was the first time the event had been run in Luxembourg, there were several photographers and even a film crew in attendance! So much for anonymity... Actually, in a village as small as Luxembourg, anonymity just doesn't exist. One of the magazines was asking everyone the same question: 'What's your ideal partner?' Although tempted to answer '2 legs3, 2 arms and a pulse'
the thought of this actually being printed made me modify my answer to the more smarmy 'I don't have a shopping list of criteria - you can just tell when the chemistry is right!'

Questions, questions

I didn't get asked too many obviously 'prepared' questions, although I was asked what my favourite beer was. My friend from down the road got asked what her five year plan was 4. I have to say, all the guys were lovely, they all looked well, were capable of
holding a witty conversation 5 and were brave enough to come along. The ultimate bravery award must go to the guy6 who had the telly crew
following him around all evening. And I mean everywhere! When I was standing in the queue for the loos, the producer knocked on the door and said;
'John? Is that you? Can you turn your microphone off?'

And the results of the Luxembourg jury...

There were very few of the guys who I marked as outright 'no's. One spoke only French, very very fast, without letting me speak at all. Plus he was disguised as the Milk Tray man, in a black polo-neck and jacket. Another couple of guys were way too young for me7. For most of the rest I put 'friend'. At least that gives us a chance to meet up again sometime for a drink or whatever. And of course I did mark a couple of 'Yes!'s 8, including one charming man who's just opened a new bar, and asked me for a drink this weekend!

Anyway, all the marking sheets have now been handed in, the computer will work out if there are any 'Yes/Yes' matches, and pass on the relevant email details. Tadaaaaa!

What next?

I shall be keeping a watchful eye on my emails this Friday, and who


27.11.03 Front Page

Back Issue Page

1Overweight.2Always pissed.3Not THE 2legs!4Obviously someone planning to set up the next Communist super-state.5Well, for three minutes at least!6Let's call him John. Which, rather
conveniently, is his name.
42 you know!
8You can do your Meg Ryan impersonation now if you like.

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