h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Does this curse mean that we ... can't leave?

[Masque]: An interesting question. I believe Irv may have just inadvertently locked us inside. Of course, H2G2 continuity allows us to be in two places at once... but I'm not sure how we would get out of here...

I suppose that, as Don Henley would say, you can check out any time you want...

[B takes off his mask, revaling that he has the same *face* as Yar, as well! ... Okay, it's Yar. Anyway, he walks over to the door with a calculating expression.]

[Yar] Hmm. I wonder if my telekinesis is fine enough that I can pick locks with it ...

*Masque chuckles, as though to himself, but in an overly theatrical manner*

[Masque]: Oh, I suppose you could *try* that. I'd love to see what happens!

*ED's Note: I seriously think the author is making this up as he goes along at this point. Clearly he has no idea what this curse is or does. He's just using this as an excuse to create a roleplaying experience that is self-selecting and doesn't bother those who don't want to roleplay in the Cafe*

I think that's a bit ... mitigated by the fact that we're the only ones posting in this thread.


[Yar concentrates; vague clicking sounds are heard from the other side of the door.]

If I had known I couldn't leave, I'd have skipped the corset when I dressed for this role.

Is there any sangría?

[Yar continues concentrating. After a moment, he puts his Guy Fawkesmask back on upside-down.] Shoulda worn this yesterday ...

*Brings out a large pitcher of what appaerrs to be chunks of fresh fruit soaking in red wine*

Of course, my dear.

Sangria? Uh - I'll stick with the Tequila please - Sangria tends to fool me into thinking I'm drinking fruit juice and before you know it, I'm dead drunk...

Maybe pounding on the door might attract the attention of someone on the other side of it?

*pounds on the door with her fists*

*Masque examines Titania*

[Masque] If you insist. Straight tequila, or another Tequila Mockingbird?

Didn't we have a view of other buildings and the Magic Forest before? *gestures toward the front window* Looks like high desert to me, now.

*daintily extracts a toothpick from the bowl on the counter and starts fishing for chunks of orange in her drink*

[Masque]: Hard to tell by this moonlight, but you may be right.

[There's a much louder clacking sound from the lock]

Aha! It's ...

[He turns the handle of the door, which resolutely fails to budge]

... yes, it's definitely jammed beyond all reasonable hope of unlocking it, with or without psychokinesis.

[Masque]: Well, there *is* another door... I haven't gone through that way myself in ages, it leads down into the cellar where we keep the wine and the oil for the lamps. I *think* there may be a crawlspace that leads out into the outdoors... but I'm not sure where it comes out.

Please excuse me for a minute. I can't travel with a bustle on.

*picking up her dainty IC clutch purse, she heads for the ladies room to change*

[Yar shrugs, and tosses aside his costume; he's wearing his usual red jacket, black H2G2 T-shirt, and blue jeans underneath, and also a large katana and a Chefinator gun at his belt. He draws the sword, which seems to have an etherial power around it.]

[Yar] I *could* go all Gordian on this lock ... or would that be going all Alexander like on the Gordian Knot? Or maybe ...

*returning from the ladies wearing a split riding skirt with pantaloons, a garibaldi shirt and leather vest, all topped with a good felt stetson and footed with cowboy boots*

Or you could nick your sword on somebody else's plot device. Careful, there.

*looks down at her Mortitia Addams dress*



I didn't bring any other clothes - does anyone have a knife I could borrow to make a few cuts in this thing?

[Masque]: A knife? Well, you could use Yar's sword. Or you could use this.

*Masque reaches beneath the bar and pulls out a rather wicked looking Bowie knife with an engraved handle: "To Red, from David"*