h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Ah, thank you Jenny.

*Wanders off in the aforementioned direction, but unfortunately falls down an open manhole*

*throws a spare toaster down after him so he doesn't get too hungry*

*throws down some bread, some marmite, some butter, some knives and a power supply for use in conjunction with the toaster*

[horrified gasp]

You can't let him eat that muck!!

*runs over, tosses in a jar of Vegemite.*

*And jumps down himself so that Peregrin won't have to do his own washing up. The manhole, of course, leads to the sewers:
http://www.h2g2.com/forumframe.cgi?thread=28386&forum=26840
*

*suddenly remembers the unforgettable blackcurrant jam, and throws that down too*

Better than that vegemite stuff anyway...

*Peregrin rings for an ambulance on his mobile phone*

Well I don't know. I fall down a manhole and break both my legs. Then some idiot drops a toaster on my head. And then somebody drops some knives, causing some nasty injuries on my head and shoulders. Followed by a jar of marmite, which smashes and gets into the cuts, causing excruciating pain. Then a large power supply knocks me unconsious. When I come round, I'm covered with blackcurrant jam, and I'm allergic to blackcurrants. Somebody clean up all the blood and vomit, please.

Oh thanks for the butter, though. Very nice.

I do the washing up, but I am NOT washing up your vomit.

I'm not going to rise to the Vegi vs. Marmite debate again. Oh no.

I've found the 2 ways to live website, if you wanna check it out: http://www.matthiasmedia.com.au/2wtl/ . Widdley-hoo!

Just out of curiousity, how many of us here are college students? Personally I'm from Virginia Tech in the USA.

Well, Peregrin, in future I won't bother to help you, if that's the attitude you're going to take...

Oh, and I'm a university student. Sort of.

Well, I'm a COLLEGE student. However, in 'Not America' land (UK) that means I'm only a 6th-former. So, as far as you're concerned, sorry but I'm not. Ask me in a few years...

Sorry, I seem to have put my americanised foot in my mouth with that one.

I haven't decided whether I'm at university or not. I'm sort of half-half. (I'm taking a year out, but I'm not sure whether to go back or not)
There was something else I wanted to talk about. What was it? Hmmm......oh yes, Big Mad Mr T, I had a look at the 2 ways to live website. It's very good, I've put a link on the main page. Thanks for the reference.

That reminds me - I occasionally update the H2G2 Christians page with new links and stuff, so could people occasionally check it, not just look at the forums? Thanks. And I need input, there's another forum for that, called H2G2 Christians Revisited.
Cheers!

Just to clarify things for you, Peregrin: you're not at university.

I will admit that I have only read about one-tenth of this conversation, so I am jumping in pretty much blind. I will also say straight away that I am not a college student; that phase of my life is well behind me (but not so far behind that I can't remember it very well). And, my on-line handle not withstanding, I am a female of the species.... And I will also say that I was raised Catholic, and graduated from a Catholic University, where I had 2 courses in theology and three in philosophy. And so now I will play devil's advocate...

The Romans believed whole-heartedly in their own gods and goddesses.. So did the Greeks. And the Pagans. The Jews (and I live in a Jewish neighborhood) believe in their own religion, as do the Moslems. A huge percentage of the world's population does not believe that there is only one god (Chinese, Japanese, Indian, Native American, African, etc.) Why are Christians right and these people wrong? If the only requirement to get into heaven is a belief in God, then why did God never reveal himself to the above-mentioned ethnic groups? If God (and Christians) are loving and kind and wise, then why the Crusades? Why the burning of "witches" (really pagans; women had much more power in pagan religions) in such vast numbers in the Middle Ages that there are records of whole villages where no women were left alive? (By the way, they used to flog the children of these women by the fires that were consuming their mothers. Talk about loving the innocent...)

It is difficult to be a woman and be a Christian. It is difficult to believe in a religion which exalts a virgin, which holds up woman as the downfall of man, which literally removed whole books from the Bible because they mention Lilith, Adam's first wife who left Eden rather than submit to the will of a man. It is difficult to support a religion which burned women by the thousands for practicing their own religion,which ignores the fact that Christ's first miracles all revolved around women, which ignores the fact that Jesus sought to give women a power still denied them by the Church 2000 years later.

I believe in love and peace. I believe in helping others out of the kindness of my heart (and yes, to answer an above posting, there IS selfish motivation behind every kind act any human has ever done, because in the natural world in which we live, we are programmed to do things which are good for us). I believe in compassion and forgiveness and healing. But I believe in them because they make me feel good in this world, not out of some hope for happiness in next.

Right. I may get gunned for this one. Let the games begin...

P.S. This posting was not meant to sound hostile. But it IS passionate. I am in a minority in this part of the world, as I DON'T believe in the Western idea of God. I believe in life, the universe, and everything (haha). I believe we are all connected, I believe that there is a greater power that runs through the world.But I call it Life, not God. My faith and beliefs lie more with the East than with the West. And for a great little book that explains it all, read "The Tao of Pooh" by Benjamin Hoff. It explains the principals of Taoism, believe it or not, through the Winnie-the-Pooh stories. Just don't tell the Pope about it, or you'll be called a heathen...

Glad you found it of use.
I'm still quite keen to make an animated version, so I've written off to Mathias Media to ask their permission.
What a lovely young chappee!

I just want to make a few points:
not all Christians are Catholics (not that there's anything wrong with Catholics, I'm sure) - I'm certainly not. We have plenty of female leaders in our Church. I would say that, in Medieval times especially, when so-called 'witches' were burned etc. that the people doing the burning were not those who had direct contact with the Bible, and could only be fed information from their ministers, who could understand the greek, latin or whatever version of the Bibile they had. This was a time of extremes. It doesn't tell us in the New Testiment to burn people - no matter what their belief. That is a thoroughly UNChristian thing to do. I would not say that God tells us to do many of the immoral things you mentioned, although the Bible does on occasion say some rather odd things about the positions of women in the church - but that could mainly be derived from Jewish traditions.
There isn't anything wrong with Christianity - but there are, and have been, a lot of wrong 'Christians'.
An final example: the so-called religious wars in Ireland. Catholics vs. Protestants. They display utterly unChristian behaviour in terroism and brutality. They are not, in my opinion, true Christains. Their actions are guided by a history of hate and prejudice, and not the Bible.
Well, that's enough of that.