h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

You know, about average for a Saturday night. Can I get you a Sunday morning tipple?

*pours *

Here you go. I'll take the Tentacle off Tencon 3 and and back down to 4. Things seem to have sorted them selves out a bit.

Ok we'll have a and a please

*pours and *

here you both go.

*hiding face behind hands*
Is it safe to come out yet?

I think so. Unless any more super-villans turn up.

*pours *

Here drink this to settle your nerves.

*carefully removes one hand to lift the and drink it*

That was clever, how did you drink through your fingers like that.

You learn to adapt to situations like this after a while.

*Music begins to play, specially composed to throw up a mental image of a vicious, haddock-based duel raging and crashing through the pub.*

Death Avocado draws back his arm and with an almighty *spl-CKOD*, knocks Uncle Heavy to the floor. He hurries over to the bar.

[Death Avocado] Half a hollowed-out three-quarter-pumpkin of Boddington's, please! I'm in a hurry!

On the floor, Uncle Heavy groans and begins to get up.

The don't happen that often.

*pours *

Here we go again.

*Will be back once he finds out how to do the new drinkies*

Well that was a quick visit.

I still know how to do this one Menza:

I hope you are all ok over there with the flooding...

Linus just do an old drinkie and it will work.

A here please Menza, and whatever the villians are having.

Do i just saw DD - very sensible of them to use the symbols we already know rather than make us learn new ones...

please

~maria charges back in and BLASTS Death Avocado with her trusty bazooka, splatering the pub and it's denizens in guakamole and little bits of orange spandex.~
HA! Take that you hack! EV! you better not be running up my tab here or I'll blast you too (and to think I didn't see you sitting there earlier). You were hiding weren't you? Well you sneek, you're lucky I have an appointment or I'd make you very unhappy. Uncle Heavy are you in here? Oh, well, I can't wait any longer.
~with that maria takes her trusty bazooka, which she has nick-named Blaire, and another bottle of kaluha and runs out again.~

i think that calls for another

*In between beatings*

Look *thud* I'm dreadfully *oof* sorry about all *thump* this.

*headbutts Death Avocado and stands up*

This is all very complex. I'm a hero really. But I'm undercover. And trying to thwart a hostage situation. while at the same time perpetuating it. And I think some of you should have your livers looked at.