h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

you're all young whippersnappers to me

I started college when a pocket calculator cost $100. I am still going. They can't give me a degree (or charge for graduate credits) because I've change majors too often. I haven't had a Prof. older than me in 5 years. I try to stay current (no pun intended, once an electronic engineering major)

I'm impressed. Does that make you the last of the professional students?

They sell *pocket-sized* calculators now?

Think I'll stay right where I am, thank you. None of the local pubs are open around the clock, but I can always find one that is open when it suits me

*pours several *

This bar is one of the best! Thanks to Menza! *Downs several *

*Pours several more *

*drinks several more *

*polishes glasses*

*smudges dirty finger prints on Menza's highly polished glasses*

*pours and re-polishes glasses*

*downs and hands back the empty glass with more smudges*
*smudges up the bartop as well*
Its a new anti bacterial gel to protect myself from anthrax. Once you put it on, it never comes off. Never.
Kinda like terrorism. Once you see it, it never goes away. Never.

This calls for more of your "several more ", Menza

*takes a few *
evening gentlemen and women.

*helps Menza polish some glasses*

Hello there. Don't bother about helping Menza, he just likes to polish when he has nothing else to do.

obviously we should be drinking faster...

Is this where we all post as if we're drinking ridiculous amounts very quickly?

*orders 57 and downs them all within 42 milliseconds and orders some more*

sounds a bit like the 6 o'clock swill they had in Sydney during the 50's and 60's. All the pubs used to close at 6 so there was a mad drinking frenzy from when you finished work until closing time.

Come to think of it, nothing much has changed apart from the pubs staying open later

anyway, wish me luck. I'm just about to head of on my end of season rugby tour. No doubt when i next talk to you all i will be simultaneously and

Not ?

Good luck.