'Ben' CAC Interview
Ben is the author of a lot
of amazing guide entries for example evil
songs which was recently featured in the CAC Continuum (funny that).
Anyway, if you want to know what Ben keeps in his pockets read on -
1) Name? Ben
About 165 inches or six centimetres
5) Pets? Six
hamsters and a wife
6) Hair colour?
I’d have to wash it to be sure
7) Shoe size?
Depends on the shoes
Minimum wage earner
9) Favourite smell?
I can't smell anything. Ever
10) Favourite book?
I hate to persist with what I suspect will prove to be a running
theme with this question, but the Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. Have you
read it? You should
11) Favourite film?
Life of Brian. Probably
band/group/singer? I can always listen to the Lightning Seeds. But
I'm not sure I can spell them. Makes Amazon completely useless
13) Favourite song?
Whatever Monty Python song takes my mood. 'Finland' is always good
14) Can you play an
instrument? If yes which one? I can get a variety of orchestral
favourites from any two pillows you care to give me
15) Favourite item
of clothing? I think shoelaces are very under-rated
beverage? Do you think I can get a Blackcurrant Tango for love or
money? Well, money, anyway. That hasn't worked
holiday resort? I have lived in Eastbourne for six months and I'm
not sick of it yet
animal? The moose
19) Favourite TV
programme?Blackadder. Except the first one, obviously
take-away food? Chinese
21) If you were
stuck on a desert island what item would you take with you and why?
This is a difficult question. If I know I'm due to be stuck on a desert
island, why am I worrying about taking one thing with me when I should be
running away? On the other hand, if I am spontaneously stuck on a desert
island, the answer would be whatever the contents of my pockets happened to
be, so, some dust and a ten cent piece. Of course if you're asking a
hypothetical question then...a bag of marbles
22) If you were an
animal what would you be and why? I think endangered animals get the
best quality of care. Are sloth's endangered?
23) Would you rather
have hands made of cheese or feet made of metal and why?
I can't imagine any practical use for hands made of cheese. Metal
feet suggest limitless possibilities to me. Metal feet, definitely
24) Thursday or
Thing? Thursday because it's a better scrabble score
25) You are left in
a room with a tea cosy what do you do? Leave
26) Do you have any
hobbies? Leaving tea cosies
27) So what type of
music do you like? Anything I have chosen, instead of having it
blasted through the walls at me
28) Would you call
yourself vain? Only behind my back
29) How did you find
H2G2? It is referred to endlessly in Douglas Adams' posthumous
anthology 'The Salmon of Doubt'
30) Any future stories or articles in the pipeline? Working hard
bullying other people into writing all the entries for a Uni entry on
Hitler1. Anything else I shall
just make up as the mood takes me
One final question,
what will you be doing straight after these questions? How can I
possibly know that? I have plans to fill all of my coat pockets with
essential island survival gear, but you know the turns life takes
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These answers were taken by force, quite a lot of force
actually, maybe we were a bit excessive with the force but you enjoyed it so
it doesn’t really matter if a few people are in hospital, anyway this issue
wouldn’t have happened without Tom and MJ
as part of the Committee for Alien Content's Continuing search
for truth and a wider audience.
The CAC Continuum
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