h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Entry: How To Report A Residential Exchange Line Fault To BT - A1107703
Author: Atlantic_Cable - U196159

I wrote this after hours of frustration with customers. I think it's fairly comprehensive. Any comments?

This is a really good entry - potentially... Put it this way - you didn't need to mention here that you "wrote this after hours of frustration with customers." That much is patently obvious

There's loads of valuable advice in your article but the readers are almost all going to be the standard, thoroughly wound-up BT customers who really REALLY loathe that Automatic Customer Interface thing, let alone queueing to a snippet of Vivaldi on endless loop. Sure, it's not the BT advisor's fault, and nor is the problem with the phone line, but people live maddeningly frustrating and futile lives and a chance to have a moan at a faceless and helpless person at BT is not to be passed up.

If you went through the entry again and edited all the bits like:

"Hint: If you do not want to push buttons, listen carefully to the first set of instructions because that is where you are given the option to simply queue for an advisor."

To say something like:

"Tip: For those who prefer not to battle through the maze of touchtone menus, there is an option here to queue to speak to an advisor."

Or, where you've written:

"Try to identify the MAIN problem you are experiencing. A customer who is unsure what the main problem is may well confuse the advisor and get them befuddled. This may lead to a delay in repairing the line."

Try:

"If at all possible, try to identify the MAIN problem you are experiencing. This will avoid confusion and possible delays in repairing the line."

Anyway, you don't need some plonker like me telling you what to write, but I'm just thinking of what other readers might think. It's like those "I.T. Help Desk Howlers" e-mails that people send around, and you think - "Well, yeah, you're right, the 'idiotic' caller doesn't know how computers work - but I don't suppose the Help Desk I.T. savant knows how to plumb in a central heating system, or research cancer drugs or whatever it is that the 'daft' caller does for a living."

So, er, have I written enough here? Yes, I think so. Sorry... it is a really good article.

Thanks for the input. I changed the entry using your wording. It looks better now thanks.

You can really tell when someone writes from experience rather than from research. This is a thoroughly good entry

The content is excellent but there are a few typos and grammatical problems:

"The earliest time they will possible respond is going to be tomorrow."
Should that be 'possibly'?

extnensions - extensions

"Unless they rent extnensions from BT, the only equipment BT has in the customer's house"
How about 'Unless the customer has rented extensions from BT, the only equipment BT has in their house...'? It always sounds a little odd to me, calling someone 'they' in a sentence before you have established who 'they' are.

housr - hours

Tche - The

lowl - lowly (?)

I would also change the title to use BT's full name (while keeping it to the initials throughout the entry) just for the benefit of anyone living abroad.

Really well done


Scout

Thanks for the input, I have changed the entry. I also expanded BT in the tile as you suggested.

Thanks.

Greetings,

A few minor typos...

In 'CSGS - Customer service guarantee scheme...'

"One __moths__ line rental back"
"__AFC__ is an additional amount"

In "Complaints"

"__resposible__ for all personnel in the __buildin__"

I beleive that OFFCOMM should be OFCOM, you can link to them at http://www.ofcom.org.uk (or .gov.uk, which redirects to .org.uk)

If you want to link to OFTEL, they are http://www.oftel.gov.uk

The paragraph regarding heart conditions and CSDP may make a good 'Hint:' paragraph.

Given that this is a web-based forum, and that ADSL is on the increase, you may want to mention something about filters; as when using the test socket on the linebox, you may find things don't work because the DSL carrier signal is there, but that might run the risk of getting too technical.

Other things to report to BT faults:
Street cabling boxes with doors hanging open
Damaged phone boxes
decaying manhole covers (having fallen down one, I tend to keep an eye out for them now).

The same things also apply to other telephone companies, assuming you can actually get through to them.

I don't suppose you work anywhere near the Portsmouth area? If so, I may see you down the BT Club one of these days..

Thanks very much for your input.

I acctually work in the Thurso call centre. You may know us as "Those useless b***ards who can't do anything right. Beleive me is the managers. And Coventry (our control centre who tells us what to do)

My philosophy has and always will be: When they pay me enough to be competant, I will be.

> You may know us as "Those useless b***ards who can't do anything right.

Umm, no. That would be AnotherTelecomsCompany(TM).

I may be a member of the BT Social Club, but I don't work for BT; I build and fix PC's, hack on linux, write horrible mathematically oriented software for windows, and manage a betting shop. It's an odd mix, but someone has to do it.

Hello,

A Scout has recommended this for inclusion in the Edited Guide, but it looks like this is still 'in progress'. Would you like a little more time to polish this off, so we can get the Scout to pick something else for the time being?

Let us know either way.

Nice work, Jimster! I *thought* it was finished, but I'm happy to accept whatever comes out of this...

Another typo/style thing:

"Any other extention sockets/wiring is most likely the property of the customer ..."

Might it not read better as: Any other extension sockets/wires are most likely the property of the customer...?

I did like the article!

I find this article is confusing. There is a lot of information in it, but it doesn't seem to be presented in any particular order. It jumps around from one topic to another. For example, in the middle of the section called Reasonable Expectations, it suddenly starts talking about telling BT if you have a heart condition.

I think it would be better if you decided on three or four main sections and then moved sections around until they were in the right place. For example, you might choose "What you should do in advance", "You agreement with BT", "Reporting the fault" and "Taking it further if you are not happy", or something like that, but with shorter titles on the sections.

I have spotted a few typing errors:

talling, perogative, repsonsibilities, extentions, seperate

Thanks for the suggestion. I have reformatted the entry and have to say it is much better now, thanks .

For the scouting question, it may be an idea to leave this here for a couple of days to get any further input.

Hoist by my own petard Jimster, are you happy to wait a couple of days before AC's happy with it, or shall I withdraw it and make another pick?

If you want to use BT's full company name it's "British Telecommunications" - "Telecom" is just short for Telecommunications, it's not a word in its own right.

You're right, KerrAvon. The Regulatory information on BT's site has the following: "British Telecommunications plc (BT) operates under a licence granted by the Secretary of Sate for Trade and Industry under section 7 of the Telecommunications Act 1984 (the Licence). "

Yep. My Dad worked for BT from school leaving to retirement (well, actually it was still the GPO when he joined), and I did my stint there as well.

Okeedokee, I'll free up the eager Scout to make another pick, and hopefully come back to you next week. Thanks for the hard work on this one though!

Yeh, I work for BT and I don't care what it's called, as long as people aren't swearing at me.

My nicest ever customer was a guy whose line was dead for nine months as BT was replacing 4 Km of burnt out cable after a lightning strike.

Not bad. There are still a couple of outstanding issues such as OFCOMM vs OFCOM and a typo in the "Remember:..." blurb in the last section.

Cheers!