h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Maurice Ravel
Was inclined to dwell
On the booty-full charms of his dancers.
When Bolero took off the old chancer's
Bits started to swell.

Luca Marenzio
Disliked silenzio
And wrote madrigals by the sheaf
You must be a Taliban chief
If that offends you

Fleeing the lowland
Of England, John Dowland
Departed for shores that were distant.
Yet his Lachrimae followed, persistant
From Penzance to Poland.

Bishop Berkeley
Muttered darkly
That matter is merely ideal,
But yet remains seemingly real.
Obvious? Starkly.

Elizabeth the first
Waved "goodbye" to the hearse
As it took away her newly dead boyfriend.
With her, the dynasty would end;
A Tudor Curse?

René Descartes
Cared not a fart
For geometry non-algebraic;
Co-ordinates, though formulaic
Were close to his heart

Arthur Schopenhauer
In his "ivory tower"
Found life was a struggle uphill.
The question of nature and will
Made him gloomy and dour.*

*So paranoid, in fact, that he slept with a gun beside his bed.

I'm plunged into doubt
And worry about
Poor Arthur and his metal teddy
Did the gun that he kept at the ready
Point inwards or out?

Schopenhauer's dad
(No thought for the lad )
Jumped in a canal, thereby drowning,
Which might explain poor Arthur's frowning
And feeling so sad.

That would be a fright
And certainly might
Have led to the gloomy conclusion
Benevolence is a delusion
(And he may be right)

A benevolent king
Said, "There's just one thing
That really annoys the heck out o' me,
And it comes from those of lesser anatomy
Who quest for my ring."

Correction and apology to Ferruccio Busoni, unfairly accused in F120626?thread=265158&skip=157&show=1 (or "in reply to this post" button)

Busoni would do no
Such thing -- it was Gounod
Who added his Ave Maria
To Bach's Prelude for the Klavier
As of course you know

Some folks like to tipple.
For some, not a ripple
Of pleasure derives from such tippling.
In my case, I do not like Kipling
And so I don't Kipple.

Well if you hate dribbling don't dribble
If you dislike scribbling don't scribble
If you can't take calmly
The rest of your family
And hate all your siblings, don't Sybil!

????????Yikes? A Limerick? Here, in the Convent of the blessed Order or St.Rimickle? What CAN they be thinking of?

Aaaagh
Bleaagh
Wrong thread
Strikes head
Naah

Sir Isaac Newton
Though kinda cute on
Principia, prisms, and gravity
Indulged in Alchemic depravity,
(A different suit on!)

Oscar F Wilde
Was constantly smiled
On, by those who enjoyed his polemics
And also by gruff academics
His wit had beguiled

When poor Oscar Wilde
Was finally trialled
For secret liaisons with men,
The admirers all turned on him then.
No doubt he was riled.

It is an odd call
For O. Wilde's fall,
For if he had now we would not have
The poem that, all hearts, does grab;
From Reading Gaul.