h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

[quote]"Hey Fartlander"[/quote]

Not the most flattering thing you could say to the founder of this campaign, is it? But since you are a friend of microbes and think we rock... welcome to the campaign! Here's your complimentary cup of yoghurt (although I must warn you that I may or may not have added things to it! ), and bite on this stick while I brand you on the shoulder.



You will find your badge on the campaign page (A1001854). Have fun!

Re: autoclave - well, I don't know what model autoclave you use, but ours is a Dixon and the manual says 121C, 15 pounds per square inch, 15-30 mins (as do most manuals and textbooks I've read). The automated ones in my co-supervisor's lab have the same settings, and, so it seems, everybody else's (that I know of). At any rate, anything above 15 psi on our machine registers in the red (danger) zone; it is implied that when the pressure goes beyond the red zone (ie 30 psi and above), that you should run for your life, screaming and tearing your hair out. We haven't had any contamination problems anyway, so the boss isn't all too keen on replacing the machine.

Just out of curiosity, at what pressure setting does your lab do autoclaving?

I shall check for you on Monday, but fear I have made a fool of myself (what's thce conversion rate between psi and kilopascals?). If you people would come into the 21st century and use SI units the yanks wouldn't have lost that martian explorer automaton a couple of years ago.
I seem highly abusive in my conversations with you, but I had a major thing to hand in Friday, and the lack of sleep compounded the intake of alcohol and... you know the story.)
Thanks for getting this thing together, you're a better man than I. Giving my time to faceless nobodies (i.e. me) would become very tedious very quickly. I'm going because I sound very rude, I'm actually a nice bloke! Get back to you.Thanks for all your work (see, Im not fixed in a@#%#%@e mode).

well the cheese had to go ... on account of the need for space ... its gone to live in the bin where temperature may suit the mould better ... so fed and watered off they go into the big scary world beyond my front door ...

Well Farlander, I just had a look at your userpage. Oddly enough we have a number of things in common. I too have been inflicted with the curse of hypergraphia and have a love for astronomy, but only did it at first year level before finishing my BSc with a double major in microbiology and genetics (both of which you seem to enjoy). I am doing my Honours year in micro now, and have a question for you. All the Brits I have corresponded with on h2g2 tell me there is no such thing as an honours year over there. This may be so for some subjects, but I'm sure that can't be the case in micro. Tell me it isn't so. Am I knocking myself for something that is a figment of my imagination? Our acedemic years run from Feb-Nov, but I think yours finish mid year, so does that mean you've nearly finished your Masters? I hope to hear from you soon, and hope you find this message to be of a more polite nature than the previous verbal battering. I apologise, and have gone out of my way to be non-offensive this time around. I didn't even make reference to you being a big tromboner (it was damn hard to resist). May all your transformations be successful.
PS What project are you working on?

Hello Biomass,

No worries; I've dealt with much worse insults! (among the many many jokes about trombones and the egos of trombonists in general) I don't imbibe in alchol, but have been through the stage where I had two million plus one things to hand in on the same morning, and so sympathise with your plight.

To whom were you referring when you said, "If you people"?

1 psi = 6.89 kilopascals. I don't know of anybody here who uses the measurements 'Pa' or 'kPa'...

I began my love affair with astronomy when I was in 4th grade and found the science section in the local library (as well as Sagan and Hawking); I didn't realise I wanted to become a microbiologist until I was in Upper 6th Form!

Our semesters run from May/June to March (1st semester late May-October, 2nd semester November-March, 3rd - optional/"summer school" - semester March-May). Yes, we have an Honours year over here (well, you didn't really define where "here" was, did you) only most of us tend to rush things and squeeze things into three years (I still got my 1st Class Hons anyway). That's what happens when nobody really monitors what courses the undergrads are taking, and when (for example, I did History & Philosophy of Science III before I did I and II).

Re: projects - I'm currently working on a couple of virulence genes of the bacteria Legionella pneumophila (aka the aetiological agent of Legionnaires' Disease), although to be perfectly honest, I'm sick and tired of treating bacteria as the bad guys. And you?

Cheers,
Far.

Trombone: \Trom"bone\, n. 1. (Mus) A slide whistle with delusions of grandeur.

so mr farlander likes to blow his own trumpet eh !!! .. well my latest experiment involves a pack of potatoes in the veg stand ... now this one deffinately is not pleasant at all ... the smell brought this to my attention ...phew ... they went str8 out to the bin ... i need some friendly bacteria please !!!

Ah heh heh...well, the friendliest of friendly bacteria would be the baker's yeast. Er, have you tried fermenting the potatoes to see what kind of alcohols and other chems the microbes would make out of it? I wouldn't recommend sampling them, of course, but it would be great fun feeding it to household rodents to see what effects the stuff has upon them.

No, I don't like blowing trumpets. I *do* tend to blow my own horn (and just in case you're wondering, yes I play the French horn as well). And trombones are much, *much* worse.

on this occasion we will pass on tater experiments .. my body is still being ravaged by rogue strains of a flu virus and just aint interested !!! ..i can play the horn too ... the cream horn ...mmmm

Oooh, that's bad. Haven't you had your 'flu shots for this year? (I know they're not 100% effective, but it's got to be better than nothing)

Sorry for the delay in responding. Autoclaving is done at 120 degrees celcius and 100kPa, which equals 14.5138 psi. Please accept my most humble apologies and assurance that I will read documents more carefully in future, lest I continue to make a complete idiot of myself. Once again, my apologies (also remember I was intoxicated at the time - please take that into due consideration).I bow to your superior knowledge on all things hot and steamy (genuflect).

"You people" was in reference to you British, and once again I have made a fool of myself, as upon sobering up I realised that it was the Yanks who had incorrectly converted the information that "you people" sent them, which was in fact in SI units (i.e. meters in this case). Further apologies at this point.

"Here" is Australia, and it is not possible to do Honours without completing 3 years of undergraduate studies as the lectures run in a determined series and the exams are held at the end of each semester/lecture series. After passing your B Sc you might be lucky enough to get an offer to do your Honours (the Faculty sends you a letter, then the micro department sends one - what the hell for, I've already been advised by the faculty), which is a further (4th) year. In fact the course code for Honours is MIC40HON, so there's no getting in early. Honours is a year in the lab, with several things for submission along the way (eg. a 10,000 word thesis at the end, a 5,000 word literature review in a few weeks) so you couldn't "squeeze" it in with other subjects as you couldn't attend lectures or pracs for them. Furthermore, attendance is expected in the lab 9am-5pm Mon-Fri, and if you get out at 5pm you've had a win. I have to go in tomorrow (Sat), but Honours students get the keys to the micro building, and to your particular lab because you ARE going to be there at strange times and odd days. I'm told by July I will be there 12 hours a day 7 days a week, so I'm obviously thrilled by that. Also, it will not be uncommon to pull all-nighters at uni, sometimes 2 nights in a row (which I have already announced that I will not be doing, my dog can starve for one night every now and then, but 2 nights in a row just isn't right).

My research project is on the processing of mitochondrial RNA, meaning I get to deal with Dictyostelium discoideum quite a bit (I isolate mitochondria from the poor buggers).

Keep up the good work, and ignore fools who jump in half-arsed and humiliate themselves. I do

they got me in the end !!! ... im now on a course of anti-biotics .. guess they got me back for evicting that block of cheese last week ... cest la vie !!! ..

"Ah heh heh...well, the friendliest of friendly bacteria would be the baker's yeast"

Farlander, I'm surprised at you, I'd have thought you'd know that baker's yeast is a fungus!

*Gives Biomass a sympathetic pat on the back.*

In Ireland, if you want to do proper microbiology, you first of all have to do two years of an undenominated science course, then in year 3, you take a few subjects, wort varying amounts of points, to a total of 36, of which microbiology may be one. It's only in year 4 that you actually get to do microbiology full time.

Thanks Hussassan,
Pat on the back gratefully acknowledged and received. The Aussies and the Irish have always had a lot in common, although it usually revolves around a love of song, humour, alcohol and pretty women. Now that I think of it, microbiology is a bloody poor substitute for any of the above. Bummer, I was feeling good about myself not two minutes ago.

Hussassan - yeah, I know! Blasted heck. It was a typo - I wanted to type 'microbe' - but I couldn't do anything about it after I'd hit the SUBMIT button, and it appeared there! (this has got to be the only forum where you can't edit your own posts )

Biomass - no worries! I'm not perfect either (see above para). Re: university - we're given the freedom to set our own schedule here. Well, more or less. Our university implements the credit system here (one credit hour is equal to one hour of lecture per week; if you're in science, two or three credit hour papers are equivalent to two or three hours of lecture - respectively - as well as three hours of labwork. Our fees are also based on how many credits we take per semester... it's about US$11 per credit hour per sem), and you're expected to take no less than 12 credits and no more than 20 per semester.... unless you're a good student, in which case they extend it to 24. For science courses, you need a total of 120 credits to graduate, although most of us do more (for the hell of it, and because we like to err on the side of caution). Of course we have guidelines as to what we're supposed to take in our 1st/2nd/3rd years, but most people tend to finish the prerequisite papers early, and dive right into their majors.

I did my thesis in my third year (I took 'summer school/vacation semester' to complete it). And yeah, we're expected to write a 10,000-word thesis, but as I recall, I exceeded that...

And no. I. Am. Not. British.

(Oh, and I love Perth by the way. Went there a couple of years back; wanted to move there)

"Now that I think of it, microbiology is a bloody poor substitute for any of the above"

Well, microbiology is used to make ethanol (as we sis in our school lab about a month ago) as well as certain foods such as bread, cakes, and cheese, plus such knowledge of some form of science can be used to impress girls. As for the music...

As I recall, the last time I was smashed on ethanol I did anything but impress the girls (their boyfriends still remember me though - "He's the bloke who was trying to lookk up Lisa's skirt at that party". Memories like elephants some people, I've put it behind me, i.e. the next day, why can't they?). Not into cakes, but bread, cheese, and music are certainly my bag, baby.

Glad to see you're not perfect, was beginning to think that you were one of those spotty bummed over achievers. You know, what with the Masters, the tuba, and the French horn (coupled with the lack of alcohol), what was I supposed to think?
So you're not a Brit, then what the hell are you?
Yeah, Perth's got a small enough population to be a big city with a country town type feel (See slow pace of living and hick's as residents). I like that sort of feel, nice and unrushed, but Hobart (the capital of Tasmania) is even more so. Get there if you can.

Yes! I would like to join the Campaign! Pick me! Pick me!
And as an extra, would I be able to make the Order of Microbes an affiliate organisation of another one which I'm a founding member of: The Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Vegetables?

Please?

Welcome to the campaign, JermsG! Pick up your official badge at A1001854, and then come right back for your complimentary cup of yoghurt (it should have fermented nicely by then). And the branding by inoculation loop - which our members will testify is part of the ceremony (if a bit painful)

And yes, we would be happy to be affiliated with the Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Vegetables. I know some veggies who are very firm on the matter of being eaten without consent.

Oh, and to the other members:

Hussassan, *microbes* (and not microbiology) are used to produce ethanol! And I agree with you that microbiology not being a poor substitute - have you seen that article link I posted in the news section about microbe potential in the electronics industry, btw? GO microbes!

Where music is concerned, I do also believe that there was an article in a science journal that said that exceptional sound of the famous Stradivarius violins was probably due to a species of fungi that grew in the wood.

(I must also note, however, that no matter how desirable microbes are, glutamic acid smells *dreadful*)

Biomass - "spotty bummed over achievers" indeed! I'm a Jack of all trades (and by implication, a master of none). Oh, and it's the *trombone*, not the tuba. I can barely get five notes out of the latter!!!

I remember now - you're the big tromboner. Listen Farlander, I make these smartarse comments because they amuse me , not with the intention of offending you . If you do take umbridge (is there a d in that? Where's my dictionary) just let me know and I will commence to cease and desist. I appreciate all of your efforts regarding this society, so don't think otherwise for one minute.
Anyway Fars, do you have a sense of humour, or are you actually a stuffy spotty-bummed overachiever? (I've done it again, haven't I?).
P.S You didn't get around to clarifying your nationality. What is it you're trying to hide? Chill out Fars (may I suggest the 4 degree room)