A Conversation for Building Confidence and Self-esteem

Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 1

dpen2000

As a Christian, I believe that my faith does have an affect on the way I feel. Don't get me wrong, I do feel down, angry and of little worth sometimes or even a lot of the time. I do find, though, that when I ask for God's peace, I find myself much more able to smile and be happy.

Any thoughts?
Dpen2000


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 2

DaRC (cook, cocktail maker, cyclist )

As a Pagan I find that the structure of my path serves to remind me of the bigger picturesmiley - zen

This in turn remindes me to put my negativity into context and open my senses to the wonderful natural world about me smiley - magic


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 3

And Introducing... A Leg

As a Materialistic Atheist I believe that my problems are nothing more than imbalance among certain chemicals in my brain. The knowledge tat this imbalance will not last is all I need to get through it. That doesn't make it okay at the time of course, but just being a load of atoms, it doesn't have any long-term effect on me.

My soul doesn't need help because I haven't got one.smiley - winkeye


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 4

Tango

Personally I have to agree with A Leg. I think religion is a con invented by preists to make money. Call me a cynic but...

Tango


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 5

Robert Wall [Undead]

'In my opinion, religion is a myth created by people afraid of the truth. It is practiced only by people who believe it (probably because they can't handle "The Truth") and those who haven't thought seriously about it.'
-- From my website


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 6

And Introducing... A Leg

I don't actually have anything against religion per say, I just don't believe it. Jesus was one of the best men that ever lived.


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 7

Robert Wall [Undead]

Nor do I, I just like quoting myself smiley - winkeye.

Seriously though, I had religion forced on me for the first 12 years of my life (my parents still don't accept that I'm Atheist), so I'm very opinionated about this sort of thing...


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 8

Chris

OK Tango ... You are a cynic smiley - smiley

I know a few priests (and am married to one, to declare an interest!!) I don't know any rich ones, but they are all very busy serving God by helping folks!

As for Christianity and self-esteem - I agree entirely with the first posting. The realism is encouraging, in that "even" (!) Christians do get down on themselves - I have been clinically depressed in the past - but I believe that Christian faith tells us we all have a value - as people created and loved by God, and that we all have gifts and abilities given by him. One problem is that we tend to forget this and start comparing ourselves to other people, rather than accepting that God loves us and values us as we are - as he created us to be.

Just a start on a very complex subject ... NOT one that I can claim to understand fully, of course smiley - smiley

Chris


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 9

Tango

Do you do everything you're told? smiley - winkeye

Current preists aren't that rich, I'll accept that, but at one time most of the land in Britain was owned by the church (IIRC) so that is kinda rich...


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 10

Uncle Heavy [sic]

of course it wasnt invented for money. thats the stupidest idea ever. why did apostles go to their graves after being hunted down by jews AND romans?

its either true, or its an existentialist reflection of man's feeling of being alone in a hostile world.

granted, it became about money in the fullness of time, and this is perpetuated still by american churches, but theres nothign wrong with the concept smiley - smiley


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 11

a girl called Ben

Some religions have been founded for money. Ron L Hubbard said 'anyone who can invent a religion is made for life' (I paraphrase him) - and then went out and founded Dianetics.

But yes, religions do affect the way you think and feel. Practicing the Metta Bhavna for example (the Buddhist meditation on Loving-Kindness) changes people at a very fundamental level.

B


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 12

Researcher PH Balance

On doing a paper on the subject of "Who Am I" for some philosophy class, I started by mentioning that I couldn't look to religion for answers, as I am an athiest. However, people do and for some people who believe that there is a higher power loving them or taking care of them, it makes them feel confident because it gives them an answer to the meaning of life, which to them probably isn't 42-but what do I know about religion?


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 13

a girl called Ben

There are atheist religions, Buddhism is a prime example.

B


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 14

Ormondroyd

Returning to the subject of self-esteem: it may be that some people find strength in their faith, but some religions harm their followers' self-esteem by teaching them that they are sinners who can only be redeemed by subservience to a supernatural Other. Feelings of guilt are obviously harmful to a person's self-esteem, and such feelings are deeply entwined with some religions. Not for nothing has the phrase 'Catholic guilt' passed into the language.

Certain religions also practice forms of discrimination that must damage the self-image of some believers. It can't exactly have been easy for women living under the Taleban regime in Afghanistan to develop confidence and self-esteem when they were forbidden to work or to show their faces in public, and there are still religious societies (Muslim and otherwise) that impose comparable restrictions on women. And it can't help homosexual people to nurture self-esteem if those around them keep saying that their sexual feelings are a crime against God.

Any self-esteem based on something outside yourself is dangerously fragile. If all your confidence is based on the belief that you're worthwhile because God loves you, then what happens if you lose your faith?


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 15

Pheroneous

I have not read Marx, but am aware that he wrote that "Religion is an opiate for the people" or words to that effect. And in this at least, he seems to me to be absolutely right. Religion is a very necessary tool to sedate the masses, and generally keep them in line. The question for this discussion would be 'Why?'. Why do people feel the need for drugs, i.e. Religion, God etc (or other drug).. How come people fall so easily into the habit of Religion (or other drug)? Could it be because they lack self-belief, they lack confidence in their own judgement and capabilities, and thus need the prop, the reassurance, the framework for life that is offered to them by Religion (or other drug)? If I were a ptb (Powers that be) I should be happy that people were busily questioning their own faith and attitude to life, and giving little thought to my effortless accumulation of power and wealth. If I were, for a random example, a munitions manufacturer, I might even be inclined to co-opt Religion to my cause, to claim that God was on my side should I wish, for a random example, to use lots of my munitions in a war on the other side of the world so that I could get richer still. I might also, for another random example, manage to persuade people of great faith to hi-jack planes and strike at the heart of my enemy... in the name of their religion. Now isn't it lucky that we have all these religious people about?


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 16

dpen2000

<< some religions harm their followers' self-esteem by teaching them that they are sinners who can only be redeemed by subservience to a supernatural Other >>

I don't know about other religions but Christianity is not meant to damage people's self esteme in this way. I am saved from my sin by repenting, not by serving God. I generally find that when Christians are serving God, though, it brings fulfilment - not a low self esteem.

dpen2000


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 17

a girl called Ben

I find a lot of religions off-putting, and Christianity just plain illogical and nonsensical, (and I know a lot about it, and have thought about it a great deal, so please respect me enough not to try to convert me).

What I found interesting though was meeting a woman whom I shall call Anna. Anna's childhood was full of rejection, first by her birth mother (who I know well) and then by her adoptive mother. Then her own child was taken away from her for a variety of resons. Anna's life was full of rejection by lovers too, and not very surprisingly she turned to drugs and a variety of other destructive ways to numb pain.

When I met her, she was the kind of Christian I dislike the most. 'The Lord' got dragged into every sentance, along with the power of prayer, the reality of miracles, and a whole load of other evangelical but socially annoying things.

Now her religion had enabled her to turn her life around; she is clean, she is a minister, she travels on missionary work, she is as fulfilled as she can be with the aching voids of her lost mothers and her lost child.

I don't attribute this to a christian god, I DO attribute this to her faith. (And as the christian son of god himself said: 'it is your faith that made you well).

So putting aside my massive irritation at what I see as her over-simplistic world view, I have to say that she has found a structure that works for her.

But it is the structure and not the deity which works.

Ben


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 18

And Introducing... A Leg

This is precisely why I don't oppose religion: people need it. And not because they're weak or stupid, just because they're different to me. I was a reluctant atheist -- I considered myself agnostic for years until I realised that atheism was the only position compatable with materialism.

I often get sympathy from spiritual people (usually new-agers and pagans, or neo-medievalists as I call them), who think I must find it hard and have an empty life as a materialist. I don't. The wonder of the universe isn't lessened by it not having spirit -- quite the opposite. That matter -- or rather energy, which matter really is -- can do all this on its own is magical.

I find that spirituality cheapens the universe. But that's just what works for me.


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 19

a girl called Ben

'spirituality just cheapens the universe'....

*disappears to mull this one over*

I am going outside, I may be some time....

smiley - winkeye

B


Religion, God and Self-esteem

Post 20

Chris

Tango asked: "Do you do everything you're told?"

Nope - but then neither does my wife smiley - smiley

Yep - You are right: historically the Church has been rich, and comparative to most of the world - it still is! Which should be a constant challenge to us!

Chris


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