A Conversation for Self Injury
King Cthulhu of Balwyniti Started conversation Oct 17, 2001
Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") Posted Oct 17, 2001
I'd like to add my congratulations too, if I may....
When I first started university, my next door neighbour, who'd had a very traumatic life by any standards, used to cut his wrists. Being a slightly naive 18 year old, I didn't really know how to deal with it, apart from to take him to casualty when he went too far and try and be around if he needed to talk - about anything, not neccesarily about why he was doing it. I wish I'd had this entry then - I think it would have helped.
I'd also echo the advice you give about dealing with your own feelings if you know someone who is doing this. It was a very scary experience, particularly as I was so young, and I felt powerless to help someone I thought of as a good friend, and that through being unable to help (or help enough) I was (or might) let him down. He found Christianity and a good woman in the end, and I think it helped him.
Lodestone - join the Debating Society at A643925 Posted Oct 17, 2001
*joins in with the standing ovation*
Possibly THE best article I've evr read here - well done!
I had a friend once who serially cut her wrists, and it felt fustrating just being unable to do anythings. However, in the end, me and her other friends helped to get her through the rough patch WITHOUT her knife.
David Conway Posted Oct 17, 2001
May I join the queue? Of people offering congratulations on your well-written article making it to the front page.
I've been a support person for a few folks who self-injure. The journey from panic, through confusion and concern, to understanding (and still concern)was an emotional one.
You done good.
Very good article overall and hopefully helpful to people in this situation.
However one point,
"it's perhaps more socially acceptable for a guy to go out and get into fights, or to vent his anger externally."
I find this line slightly sexist. I'm sorry for pointing this out when you have obviously done such a good job on what is a difficult subject but I get really pissed off when anything that could remotely be considered offensive to women is banned for sexism but this is considered alright even though it implies that men just start fights for the sake of it like some rage filled, brainless neanderthals. I'm really sorry for mentioning it because this is one of the best, and most important, articles I've read but it just annoys me.
I used to cut myself. I don't consider myself any less of a man because of it.
Once again, great article. Hopefully it will let someone out there know that they aren't alone.
Inanna has a theory - it could be bunnies. Posted Oct 17, 2001
David Conway Posted Oct 17, 2001
Bob, I can't agree that the observation "it's perhaps more socially acceptable for a guy to go out and get into fights, or to vent his anger externally."
I'm afraid that it's the accuracy of the statement that reflects the sexism in society. It's an objective fact that boys and girls are socialized differently. I don't see how recognizing society's sexism shows sexism on the part of the person who sees it.
Men. Women. Same potential. Then the prevailing culture steps in and defines gender roles. More "socially acceptable" doesn't say to me that it's men are incapable of self-control. It says that society generally *expects* less self-control of men, which is true.
Most people, on hearing the phrase "bar-room brawl" will immediatly get a visual involving only men.
Just my thoughts on the subject. I think that the statement about social acceptability is right on target, and is a sad observation about society.
Fair point NBY, I'm sorry for bringing it up now.
David Conway Posted Oct 18, 2001
Not a problem, Bob. You pointed to a problem with society. Men, all too frequently, *are* socialized to behave like neanderthals. It's worth pointing out.
Lisa the Freak // Poet by the Toga Posted Oct 18, 2001
Thanks for the great entry, I hope it helps more people become aware of SI and not jump to conclusions
Key: Complain about this post
- 1: King Cthulhu of Balwyniti (Oct 17, 2001)
- 2: Otto Fisch ("Stop analysing Strava.... and cut your hedge") (Oct 17, 2001)
- 3: Lodestone - join the Debating Society at A643925 (Oct 17, 2001)
- 4: David Conway (Oct 17, 2001)
- 5: Sick Bob. (Most recent incarnation of the Dark Lord Cyclops. Still lord and master of the Anti Squirrel League and Keeper of c (Oct 17, 2001)
- 6: Inanna has a theory - it could be bunnies. (Oct 17, 2001)
- 7: David Conway (Oct 17, 2001)
- 8: Sick Bob. (Most recent incarnation of the Dark Lord Cyclops. Still lord and master of the Anti Squirrel League and Keeper of c (Oct 18, 2001)
- 9: David Conway (Oct 18, 2001)
- 10: Lisa the Freak // Poet by the Toga (Oct 18, 2001)
- 11: Brendan (Dec 19, 2003)