h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

(or how I leaned to love disposable latex gloves)

1. Prepare salsa for mexican meal with beloved, handling and chopping raw jalapeno and anejo chillis (can you tell where it's going yet?)
2. Eat drink and be merry
3. Wash hands 4 or 5 times *very* thoroughly
4. Breath sigh of relief as you take your lenses out *without* screaming in agony
5. Believing that your hands a completely clean start rubbing your 66% water lenses in palm of hand, store and go to bed.
6. Wake up refreshed and put on kettle, let eyes settle for a while and then insert your thouroughly chilli-impregnated lenses in your eyes...
7. Scream, wail and thrash around.
8. Repeat 7.
9. Pour an entire bottle of Renu lense liquid into eyes.
10. Repeat 7
11. Finally tear out lenses and throw away

hardcode

hmmmmmm..... life is full of learning opportunities, isn't it? Bet you won't do that again!

You might want to put something in your personal space...anything.... even those shriveled contacts. That'll open up your message center so you can get a proper greeting instead of my unoffical welcome.

Here... take my hand. You'll be able to see again, someday.

Thanks, I will, been a long time since I was here - way pre-aunty

hc

Oooh - chilli must be *really* painful.

Given I only use (disposable) contacts for caving, I sometimes forget to swap from glasses to lenses before cleaning out my carbide lamp, which often ends up with fingers covered in calcium hydroxide. If I don't manage to wash it all off, a little of that on the lens can sting, but it does fade fairly quickly.

As to the chili, this isn't only harassing your eyes (the 'pleasure' of which I know will be able to avoid ) but it also has its effect if you are a male and have to visit the bathroom some time later (an experience which I did have )

and on the female if foreplay includes ^%&*%^&NO CARRIER