Escape Pod Dreams - 74
Created | Updated Jul 1, 2004
Escape Pod Dreams: The fear of rejection and horror of acceptance issue
Aspies and the moment
Free-floating anxiety is not particular what it attaches itself to. Everything can be going swimmingly and all of a sudden there it is, an unreasonable fear that something really and truly horrible and nasty is about to happen.
A certain amount of paranoia actually can be healthy. It keeps me aware of safety concerns and noticing things that supposedly "normal" people just walk right by. But the threat assessment part of my brain has to ignore everything else when then heart starts pumping and the fight/flight andrenalin thingie kicks in. I also have to concentrate on what I was doing or saying before my animal self begins to act up.
If I do find a problem and it is relatively instantly correctable, then I spring into action. It never ceases to amaze me how people who consider me a bit weird and possibly retarded change their tune when I get all serious and engage in problem-solving. When I am in the moment, I can see everything clearly and I am strong and fast and graceful. Unfortunately, when those moments pass, I am back to my bumbling mumbling confused self, kinda wasted from the extra effort,
and either looking to hide so I can take a nap or to find the next miracle I need to perform, so that I won't lose the momentum. This, also can be problematic, because I can lose steam just when others find something that needs to be done, or I can seek out problems that really aren't that severe enough to need action now.
More reasons why I need a little leeway until it's time to get out of my own way:
1. 8:57 AM
Fear of rejection, the cliff edge version
by
Your Other Right Foot (appearing nightly without warning)
2. 9:57 AM
Horror of Acceptance, the gaping door dilemma
by
Your Other Right Foot (appearing nightly without warning)
3. 10:57 AM
Moments of calm on a stormy day.
by
Your Other Right Foot (appearing nightly without warning)
4. 11:57 AM
What you can do.
by
Your Other Right Foot (appearing nightly without warning)
