h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Actually there are two kinds of comb-over, lateral and forward. The lateral is by far the most common and provokes the most hilarity. I have to admit that it's something my father-in-law does, although we are trying to persuade him to give it up.

The forward comb-over involves combing hair forward from the back of the head where the bald spot starts (or finishes, depending on your view-point). It's only effective if the hair loss hasn't progressed too far, otherwise it looks even more ridiculous than the lateral comb-over. However, if done carefully where the hair loss is minimal to moderate, it can be very effective and hard to detect. I know that the actor Art Malik did it in at least one film, and I didn't realise he was going bald until I saw him on TV some time later.

I attend a trade show every year in New York, and every year I look forward to seeing an attendee who has the worst comb-forward in the Big Apple.

I believe that under the comb-forward he is completly bald, `a la Patrick Stewart. This gentelmans pseudo-hairstyle is a '70s look, rather shaggy, over the ears and below collar. Think 'Shaggy' from Scooby Doo.

I pointed him out to a colleague who is also a New Yorker. His sincere comment was 'Woof, I'd rather be decapitated.'

I was fortunate to view the most bizzare form of the comb-over I could even imagine.

Picture a taller Patrick Stewart with an enormous white mustache.

The hairs were grown in a long series of strands just above the left ear and braided. The hairs were grown to approximately three feet in length. The hair was then wrapped around the head. Across the brow and the back of the head ending when the braid was tied around the right ear.

Please leave Patrick Stewart out of this. He is more comfortable with his baldness than most mortals and should be envied for his self confidance. If I ever go bald, may I have the faith in myself to wear my hair like Mr. Stewart.

I feel that any discussion on this subject should acknowledge the cultural contribution made by a certain great soccer player of the Sixties and Seventies. His spectacular lateral comb-over became so famous that a whole generation of Britons called the style "a Bobby Charlton".
It should, I think, also be noted that one of today's most prominent UK citizens is a master of the art of baldness camouflage. I refer to the PM (Prematurely Maneless?), Tony Blair.

Let's hear it for all the men who have the courage to wear the baldness / near baldness with confidence and pride:

Yul Brynner
Telly Savalas
Duncan Goodhew (British swimmer, 1980s)
Danny DeVito
Ed Harris
Alan Coren (Ex-editor of Punch, a British humourous magazine)
Any others?

I would add Sean Connery to that list, but Hollywood studios keep making him wear a hairpiece.

I entirely agree with CD, and I'd like to add two distinguished figures from the world of modern popular song to the "bald and proud" list: Michael Stipe of R.E.M. and The Smashing Pumpkins' Billy Corgan.

Sean Connery perfers to go with his natural baldness, but will wear toupées if the director insists. My highschool Theory of Knowledge teaker Michael Cady.

I should also have added Ian Hislop (Editor / owner / manager / ??? of Private Eye - another humourous British magazine) and Ainsley Harriot (British TV chef).

As for Connery wearing toupees if the director insists, an awful lot of them do!

More news on the great Bobby Charlton, he has now bowed to the inevitable and joined the ranks of 'bald and proud'.

Other footballers from that era who followed his lead back then are Ralph Coates and to a lesser extent Alan Gilzean.

Arthur Scargill was, and I think still is, a devotee of the lateral comb-over.