h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

A very righteous minister at the climax of his sermon, fulminating at the worlds sinful ways and how God hates a sinner, suddenly closes his eyes and expires of a stroke. When he opens them again the first thing he sees is the kindly face of St Peter. Then he looks around and sees the most beautiful place, more than he could ever imagine in life. He walks with the saint awhile but before too long he starts to feel uneasy. All around, the blessed souls are carrying on in ways he never thought he'd see. "Why, those are nigras over there, and look what they're doing. And those. That looks like two men! And there! Drinking and dancing and laughing" "They are in Heaven" says St Peter "They have for eternity the things that make them most happy" "But I can't stand it. What about my happiness?'" Peter looked at him a while then pointed out "I said they were in heaven, no one said anything about you"