h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I was surprised that only MarVin in "Towel Accessories" pointed to one of the most basic uses for towels: you can clean or wash yourself or anything else with one. You just have to wet a corner of the towel, rub some soap on it and then rub it on the dirty spot. This is even more important for hitchhikers who are standing all day on the highway in he exhaust fumes of cars. (On personal experience, a small thin dark green towel is best for such a use).

Some other uses:
baby-diaper
put under your feet after showering and while doing your face
if big enough, knot the ends on a branch and make a swing
knot around yourself to carry a child or a wounded person
in the book "The Godfather" there was an interesting use of the towel, but you can read it up yourself
and...

My experience in the area of towels tells me that a very important use of THE towel is to use it as a transducting nutreino-capacitator in the electrode matrix in any conventional spaceship in the sector 12A plural V. Strange things happen to towels in different galaxy's. Their uses are many and unusual. If a rouge towel is met in one of those obscure regions of the galaxy and is then tamed I am sure that this towel would be the prized possession above all.

I would say the best use for the towel is one in the form of a dressing gown. The gown is a mightily comfortable item that one grows into and learns to love like a true friend. One can quite happily substitute them for normal dress and indeed when not leaving the house it can be appropriate to wear them all day.

note: it is well known that a dark blue dressing gown is the best.

As an unfortunate stuck-at-home I cannot start a discussion about the best use of THE towel in a far-off space sector. But I quite agree about the various uses of towels in different worlds (Universes?), because after all one man's towel is another man's washcloth. And I would dearly love to meet a rouge towel (where?where?).

By the way, are you a relation of the famous German Baron Munchhausen?

nim

My friends girlfriend wich I am secretly seeing told me that when she get angry she goes to the bathroom and bites on a towel. I told her about the guide but she didt quite understand... =)

It's still better than biting her own hand (Ido that, and have skin problems on one finger probably because of that) but you should tell her to check out the GODFATHER book - there is some serious danger involved ....

I don't get it. What use of the Mighty Towel was in the godfather? I don't like that sort of stuff so I don't want to buy the whole book, so can someone please tell me? And where can I find a suitable towel in Australia? By the way, why is a paperclip so usefull? (I know a few reasons, but can anyone think of a list?)