h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

They need to drink to keep their minds off the retired female Olympic hammer throwers who masquerade as hostesses. Is Britain hosting the 2001 international drinking races?

Yes, that's the only reason we qualify.

I find that the best way to deal with your hangover is just to go through the day bitching and complaining to everyone else about it. It certainly doesn't cure the hangover in any effective way, but you have the oppurtunity to piss everyone else you know off and you have a really good excuse. For example:

Friend: "Hey, how ya doing Andre?!?"

You: "F*** You!!! I got a hangover s*** for brains!!!

Excellent. We need more deep thinking research.

I blame the wombats myself

I must say that, we may not have a legendary, famous, drinker since the days of Georgie Boy, but our amateur teams, are truly far from amateur, they are just not famous. Lets face it, we Brits are too busy getting pissed to look for fame and fortune.
The most memorable of all occaisons, would be a stag weekend, I attended some 5 years ago, where I arrived after a 5 hour car journey, and 4 pints and a bottle of gin, and fell, unceremoniously out of the car. Then joined the lads, 20 of us, for a weekend that consisted of:-
5x84 pint kegs of beer, 2 bottles of Plymouth gin consumed by yours truly, Saturday and Sunday lunchtimes consisting of being locked in the bar for 4 hours, and then the Landlords son driving us all back to the farm that we were staying at. I was the bartender for the event, or bar monster as I was know as. I have all always perticularly proud of our achievements. I mean when you arrive on Friday night with 3 kegs and by Sunday morning have to buy 2 more from the local pub.
We did the same thing the year previously, the differnce being that we got through 3 kegs, and 30 crates (24's) of various beers.
As to hangovers, strangely there were none that week, the brain never got a chance to object.
But hangovers as a rule I believe are part and parcel of the whole experience. If we never got them we'd all be terribly pissed all the time. Oh my god, what did I just say........

Firstly, there is nothing you can do to speed up the metabolism of alcohol. The human body produces a substance (not vomit!) that metabolises alcohol at a fixed rate. Ther is nothing that will speed up the manufacture of this substance. This substance is produced in the liver, and also in testicles (in very small amounts).

Hangovers are a different kettle of llamas.

Description: An evil combination of dehydration, sugar & electrolytic imbalance, poison (the alcohol), lack of sleep, preservatives (in white wine), and bad bar conversation all contribute to a hangover.
Prevention: Eat before and or during the drinking. Your drinking will slow down (unless you're a really messy eater), and the absorbtion of alcohol will be slower, enabling you to make it to a taxi.
Prevention after the event: Obviously if you've already got a hangover, it's too late to drink loads of water before crashing out for the night (or morning). Alternatives: Stay drunk, don't drink.
The cure: water, food, sleep. Anything else to treat the horrible symptoms may be taken such as aspirin for the headache, alka seltzer for the stomach, and beer. A beer, (or hair of the dog) will to some extent replace electrolites purged by the previous night's binge and subsequent dehydration. Gatorade may also help, but I've never tried it. Just one beer though! It will also reduce the alcohol withdrawal symtoms a little. A good healty meal will do just as good.
Not much can be done about the bad bar conversation, but then when you're that drunk you don't care and are probably babbling on yourself.

is that why women get drunk slower, no testicles?

Ain´t there any REAL men in here? If you get plastered, you deserve... Thank God for your hang over... revell in it... But no seriously, you might call me a pervert, but I reckon that there are few things that match a decent hang over. I like it, especially if you meet up with a few of the people that you had a blast with last night and sum up the last evening. Even better if it is a sunny day and you can sit somewhere outside and have a cool drink (like coke or water )... And yet even better if it was an evening where everything sort of blacks out after twelve o´clock....

Ok there are a few things I hate about too, like going to work with a hang over. But then again, working in hospitality, I reckon that a hang over gives you a very relaxed view of live, you just don´t get stressed out that fast...

Oh, and I might just add my favourite breakfast when hung over: a cup of coffee, so strong you need cutlery to drink it and a cigarette..

Just my two cents on it....


Chili

I'm with Chili on this one. Fave benefits of hangovers:

* the ability to see multicoloured prism effects around every stationary object - and the glorious sharpness of everything from trees to managers
* seeing other commuters do that strange, jerky Indonesian shadow puppet-like walk
* hysterics in the office kitchen of a morning, possibly coupled with drooling and shaking

(Suffering at the moment from a combination of red wine, port and Bacardi...)

What's even worse about having a hangover, besides the headache and general feeling of blah, is having a vague memory of what you did the night before and worrying that others will remember it too! It's not that you actually regret what's been done, but maybe you were a bit too honest and revealed more of yourself than you had intended to.

Why does everyone keep mentioning llamas? It makes absolutely no sense. Or maybe it does, and I'm just stupid. *sniff*