This is a Journal entry by Universal Granny
Where are you-u-u-u?
Smudger879n Posted Apr 8, 2005
What we needed on here was some more humour, and we have it now with that Lawyer Joke thread!
Its really good for cheering you up when your a bit low I like a good
We recently bought a DIVx player on line, it can play any Formatt of DVD that is available
My stepson gave us some really funny films on DVD to play in it, they had us ing all last night
Smudger,
Where are you-u-u-u?
Moving On Posted Apr 8, 2005
I'm lucky, I guess. I only need to look in the mirror and I *have* to laugh - if only to keep sane!
I'll try and find the Nick the Dragon Slayer joke and cut-copy-paste it "here." Its slightly rude around the edges, but it made me - don't hold your breath(s) though...... I may be some time.
Where are you-u-u-u?
Moving On Posted Apr 9, 2005
I'm back....
"Nick the Dragon Slayer had a long-standing obsession to nuzzle the
beautiful Queen's voluptuous breasts, but he knew the penalty for this
would be death. One day he revealed his secret desire to his colleague,
Horatio, the Physician, who was the King's chief doctor.
Horatio the Physician exclaimed that he could arrange for Nick the
Dragon Slayer to satisfy his desire, but it would cost him 1,000 gold
coins to arrange it.
Without pause, Nick the Dragon Slayer readily agreed to the scheme.
The next day, Horatio the Physician made a batch of itching powder and
poured a little bit into the Queen's brassiere while she bathed. Soon
after she dressed, the itching commenced and grew intense. Upon being
summoned to the Royal Chambers to address this incident,Horatio the
Physician informed the King and Queen that only a special saliva applied
for four hours would cure this type of itch and that tests had shown
that only the saliva of Nick the Dragon Slayer would work as the
antidote to cure the itch.
The King quickly summoned Nick the Dragon Slayer. Horatio the Physician
then slipped Nick the Dragon Slayer the antidote for the itching powder,
which he quickly put into his mouth, and for the next four hours, Nick
worked passionately on the Queen's voluptuous and magnificent breasts.
The Queen's itching was eventually relieved and Nick the Dragon Slayer
left satisfied and touted as a hero.
Upon returning to his chamber, Nick the Dragon Slayer found Horatio the
Physician demanding his payment of 1,000 gold coins. With his obsession
now satisfied, Nick the Dragon Slayer couldn't have cared less and,
knowing that Horatio the Physician could never report this matter to the
King, shooed him away with no payment made.
The next day, Horatio the Physician slipped a massive dose of the same
itching powder into the King's shorts.The King immediately summoned Nick
the Dragon Slayer..."
I'm gone again.
Where are you-u-u-u?
Tefkat Posted Apr 12, 2005
Erratic? Who you calling Erratic?
I'm not erratic - just flat on me back, ick.
It just slipped out.
You see UGgie? You just have to say the word and everyone creeps out of the woodwork!
Sorry I haven't been around lately. It's been a funny sort of year so far.
Poor Nick the Dragonslayer
Where are you-u-u-u?
Moving On Posted Apr 13, 2005
She's behind you!
Dunno Smurfles, haven't seen her for a while... I'll start upping the emails.
Where are you-u-u-u?
Moving On Posted Apr 14, 2005
You're not looking for *logic* are you?
Surely not?
We don't *do* logic here!
Probably RL got in the way. Granny's like Arnie (in a nice sort of a way)... She'll Be Back (I've emailed her anyway. And if necessary I'll phone her/text/etc.)
It'd be nice to know she's OK.
Where are you-u-u-u?
Moving On Posted Apr 14, 2005
I've just received this e mail from Granny - I've merely edited "names"
What happened to her is beyond remarkable, and I imagine anyone on this thread will be both concerned for UG's well being and recovery for the next while.
Ev.
From UG:
I am on my daughter's computer - can you put a message on the thread for me please. Last weekend we suffered a direct lightening strike. The phones, the computer, and most of the chimney, and especially me were all wiped out! I have been treated for shock (not the electrical kind) and am only just able to look at the sky without fear of a thunderbolt descending again.
I am sure I have told you the story of my being frightened, big time, by thunder when I was only a small child, and since then have been a nervous wreck if there is so much as a distant rumble. Can you imagine how I feel now!
I am still a bit fearful. .... but I am improving all the time, so if you could just let them know what has happened to me, I would be grateful.
Speak to you soon"
Where are you-u-u-u?
Shhhhh Posted Apr 15, 2005
Crickey
What can one say??
Poor UG -specially after the small child thing as well.
Lets hope the insurance was up to date and all that
She deserves better.
Where are you-u-u-u?
Moving On Posted Apr 15, 2005
Lets home she gets plenty TLC, comfort and cuddles from her family and friends - sod the insurance!
We can always put the hat round if her insurance wasn't up to date. I would have thought it's the LAST thing she'll be worrying about at the moment.
Not a lot one CAN say really. I'll phone her over the weekend, and with her permission, will pass on info "here" as and when there's any "news"
Poor old UG. Its always *nice* people who get shafted by the great joke that's life. But she's a lot tougher and stronger than she'll give herself credit for. She'll survive - and survive well, I reckon.
Where are you-u-u-u?
Shhhhh Posted Apr 15, 2005
Lets hope so - give her my regards when you speak eh!
Where are you-u-u-u?
Moving On Posted Apr 15, 2005
Certainly will do that thing! Its a shame we can't all club together and send her a bunch of flowers or something, really, isn't it?
There must be some sort of PC thing we could do, surely? Have a bit of a think, eh?
Where are you-u-u-u?
Shhhhh Posted Apr 15, 2005
Trouble is............... she'll need a PC + Power and all that sort of thing to receive it???
Where are you-u-u-u?
Smudger879n Posted Apr 15, 2005
To hear about UGs problem
It must have been very scary!!
Hope you get back with us all soon UG
Not having much luck at our end these days either, but we will struggle on
Just as well We have this reunion tomorrow on board HMY, that will at least take our minds of things for a day
Smudger,
Where are you-u-u-u?
Moving On Posted Apr 15, 2005
Yeah... good point Shhh... for PC-y things, one does, of course need a PC Honestly, if I had a brain, I'd be lethal
She can receive emails though - she's got access to her daughter's PC. Can't refer back to UG's letter, but I'm pretty certain there was some reference to access to her daughter's PC.
Tell me I'm not having a senior moment, there, someone!
Hang on in there Smudger.. and enjoy your Yotty reunion thing.
Key: Complain about this post
Where are you-u-u-u?
- 41: Moving On (Apr 7, 2005)
- 42: Smudger879n (Apr 8, 2005)
- 43: Moving On (Apr 8, 2005)
- 44: Moving On (Apr 9, 2005)
- 45: Triquack (Apr 9, 2005)
- 46: Tefkat (Apr 12, 2005)
- 47: Shhhhh (Apr 13, 2005)
- 48: smurfles (Apr 13, 2005)
- 49: Moving On (Apr 13, 2005)
- 50: smurfles (Apr 13, 2005)
- 51: Shhhhh (Apr 14, 2005)
- 52: Moving On (Apr 14, 2005)
- 53: Moving On (Apr 14, 2005)
- 54: Shhhhh (Apr 15, 2005)
- 55: Moving On (Apr 15, 2005)
- 56: Shhhhh (Apr 15, 2005)
- 57: Moving On (Apr 15, 2005)
- 58: Shhhhh (Apr 15, 2005)
- 59: Smudger879n (Apr 15, 2005)
- 60: Moving On (Apr 15, 2005)
More Conversations for Universal Granny
Write an Entry
"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."