h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I made friends with someone on a site similar to H2 about three years ago.We kept in regular contact,by e-mail,telephone,texts etc,and shared a lot of laughter,and some tears over the time.She had a family bereavment ,and was terribly upset,that was about eighteen months ago.
I let her know when mum died,and got a lovely card from her.
Just before christmas i rung to say i had sent a little gift for her son,and i couldn't get through to her.I sent numerous text messages,and called her moble,which went on to the answering service.Irang again,and a stranger told me he had only got that number the same day.
I wrote,and got no reply,and two weeks ago i sent a bithday card,with a return address on it.
Nothing has come back....i don't know what to do next.Maybe she has decided not to keep in touch,but i'm worried.

I'm sorry to hear that, I know I would be worried,too. Maybe you could find out who are her neighbours and ask them ?

That's sad Smurfles.

Maybe she has moved and will be in touch when she is settled. Is she near enough for you to visit? Perhaps you could find a neighbour who could help.

After a bereavement, even 18 months after, it is a bit of a worry. Sometimes though "friends" do not value their friends as much as we do, and and it is something we have to get used to, sadly.

I do hope you hear something soon, or make contact.



Websailor

The same thing happend to Mk2 and myself when we moved down here

After we had settled down, we tried to contact all our old friends, the very same ones that were really close to us. They snubbed us all we got was answering machines, and "They are out" from their kids when they answered the phone!

So we just got on with our lives, and forgot about them, it still hurt though to think that we had all been so close at one time
Smudger,

Hmm I'm not altogether sure Sal, perhaps as Websailor says she's moved & needs some time to get resettled. Let's hope for the best!

Hi Sal..
I do hope things turn out ok luv.. I understand how worried you must be.. Maybe as was said, she's moved away for whatever reason and not had chance to let you know yet.. Also go with the option of trying to contact one of her neighbours.. Of course you could also contact her local police station and explain how worried you are about not being able to get in contact... They will be able to check that she's still at that address.. I know they won't be able to tell you a forwarding address unless told to but at least you would know.. If she is still at the same address then they can pass on your concerns and ask her to get in touch...
Do hope you manage to solve the mystery luv...

Thanks everyone,my friend lives in london,and i live in yorkshire,so it's a 4 or 5 hour drive to get to her,and a very uncomfortable one for me.if i was sure she'd stil be there,i would go looking for her,but it feels like it would be an intrusion if she would rather not keep contact..I will give all the suggestions some thought,thanks for everyones help.

It's always hard when people suddenly disappear out of our lives. I think you have made every effort, sal - seems to me this person would get in touch if they wanted to. Meanwhile, you can't know why they have decided to disappear, so best not to worry about it too much.

Also, she may just pop up again one day. I've also had that happen, with people I thought I'd lost all contact with.

Perhaps she is just going through stuff that she needs to go through on her own. I know it's frustrating for you that you can't even get a message through to tell her that you are still there for her. But she may turn up again when you least expect it - and then you can tell her about how concerned you were. Until that happens I don't think there is much more you can do.

az

Having given it a lot of thought az,i think you are right.I don't think she would have lost contact if she'd wanted to stay friends,and maybe she had issues that needed resolving.I think i am going to give up on her,and put it down to what life throws at us,maybe she'll get in touch in time..

Well, don't totally give up on her, sal. And I doubt you would ever do that to someone anyhow.

Maybe she just needs time. Maybe she has simply moved on and doesn't value friendships the same way we do. Whatever.

You tried your best. And you should know that. You are an excellent friend, and I am very happy to be able to count you among mine here on hootoo.

The important thing is that you shouldn't feel badly on a personal level because an old friend has disappeared. Much better to focus on the friends you still have.

az

hi az,i try to bea good friend,i believe friendship is a very important thing in life,but maybe sometimes i take on the worries of others too much.
I value my friends greatly,and consider myself lucky to have met the friends i have on here,yourself very much included .
Maybe i am over sensitive at the moment??I shal wait ,and give it a little more time,.
maybe in the future i should type"paging the oracle",when posting to your space!!!Thanks.x

Smurfles - will e-mail you when I get home, I have an idea

Don't give up

Take care UG

Oh I hope UG had some good ideas for you smurfles.

I would not give up.
I think life gets mighty hectic at times and all you can do is rest when you can and talking about it is not always easy or desirable when problems are time consuming. Sometime good changes do the same sort of distancing. I hope you will find all is well with your friend and friendship.

It can be hard when you are amoung those that move slower and have more time to think to guage how fast or slow time is moving for others