h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

KANSAS STate
When Minister Joe Wright (he's gotta love that name)was asked to open the new session of the Kansas Senate, this is what they heard:

"Heavenly Father, we come before you today to ask your forgiveness and to seek your direction and guidance. We know Your Word says, "Woe to those who call evil good," but that is exactly what we have done. We have lost our spiritual equilibrium and reversed our values. We confess that we have ridiculed the absolute truth of Your Word and called it Pluralism.

We have exploited the poor and called it the lottery.
We have rewarded laziness and called it welfare.
We have killed our unborn and called it choice.
We have shot abortionists and called it justifiable.
We have neglected to discipline our children and called it building
self-esteem.
We have abused power and called it politics.
We have coveted our neighbor's possessions and called it ambition.
We have polluted the air with profanity and pornography and called
it freedom of expression.
We have ridiculed the time-honored values of our forefathers and called it enlightenment.

Search us, Oh, God, and know our hearts today; cleanse us from every
sin and set us free. Guide and bless these men and women who have been sent to direct us to the center of Your will and to openly ask these things in the name of Your Son, the living Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen!"

The response was immediate. A number of legislators walked out
during the prayer in protest. In 6 short weeks, Central Christian Church, where Rev. Wright is pastor, logged more than 5,000 phone calls with only 47 of those calls responding negatively. The church is now receiving international requests for copies of this prayer from India, Africa, and Korea.


"stand for something, you'll fall for everything"


There have been some very vocal ministers and the Catholic Church has come out against Bushes theme of Calling others evil and Claiming he is doing Gods work by starting a war. While I could pick this apart I do think there is a point to how twisted the cultural ideals have gotten in the US. Not to mention the leadership.

I agree with you. I cannot understand how a nation that has prided itself on free speech, equality etc can arrest a man for wearing an anti-war t-shirt in Albany NY yet claim to want to 'free' citizens of another country because of the dictator ruling them.

It sure is a mixed up world... now if you or I were world president...

Bush just had a news conference.
He said he is ready and it will probably happen within days.
He says "he prays for peace"

Chalk up another lie for the Bushmeister. I think he just might break Hitler's record after all, if he hasn't already.

I think Bush is convinced that he is doing the right thing. I just wished that I were convinced.

I don't share your confidence in Bush's goodfaith, JEllen. I think he's a liar.

I was amazed they let him wing it last night in the conference.

At one point he said: the world ...and "MY government!"

Some Of the Posters in the Peace Marches:

I'd rather my President MAKE LOVE - NOT WAR in the oval office

Drunken frat boy drives country into ditch

Bush/Cheney: Malice in Blunderland

How did our oil get under their sand?

If you can't pronounce it, don't bomb it.

1000 points of light and one dim bulb.

Sacrifice our SUV's, not our children.

Preemptive impeachment.

No George, I said Mac Attack.

Stop the Bushit.

Bush-Cheney-Rumsfeld: the asses of evil.

$1 billion a day to kill people -- what a bargain.

Consume -- Consume -- Bomb -- Bomb -- Consume --Consume

Disarm Bush too.

Big brother isn't coming -- he's already here.

Empires fall.

Impeach the squatters.

Mainstream white guys for peace. (Sign held by three
mainstream-looking white guys)

Hans Blix -- look over here.

Let Exxon send their own troops.

There's a terrorist behind every Bush.

We can't afford to rule the world.

War is so 20th century!

9-11-01: 15 Saudis, 0 Iraqis.

Drop Bush not bombs.

I asked for universal health care and all I got was
this lousy stealth bomber.

America's problems won't be solved in Iraq.

War is not a family value.

Colorfully dressed drag queen carrying a sign that
says: I am the bomb.

Picture of the peace symbol: back by popular demand.

A picture of Bush saying "Why should I care what the
American people think? They didn't vote for me."

A picture of Bush saying "Ask me about my lobotomy."

Beneath a picture of a menacing soldier pointing his
rifle/bayonet toward the viewer: Say it! One Nation under God. Say it!

What would Jesus bomb?

A village inTexas is still missing its idiot!

So bomb Texas. Our oil's there too, and their leader didn't pay attention to treaties either. Just look what appeasing him has gotten us.

Analiese, I saw that too ~ on a list of sign phrases that have been used in protests around the world.

like that "...one dim bulb" comment, & the "...Malice In Blunderland".

And that last one !

Okay, how about, from the Knights Who Say Neet?

"We're in quest of a Bush, I mean Shrubbery, so we won't be left out of the 17th Crusade, but who's counting anyways."

Or from the Knights of Columbus?

"We're right and you're godless commies, about to be discovered."

Or from the Knights of the Range aka Texas Rangers?

"We always get our man, even if we have to kill women and children to get to him."

Or from the Knights of Commerce?

"George W. Bush and Osama Bin Laden, brothers in arms, bringing you better living through bombing."

And finally, because I'm pretty certain you're probably getting overstressed,

"And you thought JR Ewing was an ignorant asshole?! Look what the real thing is like!!!"

Good Groaners!

Especially like that Knights Of Commerce quote .

Apparently these are some of the signs that people held up in the UK on the peace march on Feb 15th...

'Make Tea, not War'

'Down with this sort of thing'

'Flutemakers against the war - Vivaldi not Violence'!

'BUSH AND BLAIR SITTING IN A TREE K.I.S.S.I.N.G/K.I.L.L.I.N.G'

'George Bush Smells Of Poo'

'Gulf Sale'

'Middle Classes against the War'

'oil is thicker than blood, and George Bush is thicker than oil.'

'24 hour peaceful people'

'Mancs against Tanks'

Front: pic of Bush's face with caption, 'Nasty Bush'. Back: pic of a lady's front bottom with 'Nice Bush'.

'Whatever'.

'There's a village in Texas missing an idiot'

A women holding a banner up with a merkin (pubic wig) attached and text saying 'The only Bush I trust is my own'

'Dave says NO to war'

'It's amazing what a man will do for Bush'

'Sex Workers of the World Unite against War!'

'Tony Blair is Really Annoying'

'Grannies And Grandads Against The War'

'Dykes In Black Against The War'

'Hell Spawn Are In The White House'

'We're not very chuffed about this'

'Don't Be So Silly'

'Drop Knickers Not Bombs'

'Sad Git Spent Valentine's Day Making This Banner'

'Empty Warhead' (caption superimposed on pic of Bush)

'blessed are the cheesemakers'

'Bush is a thicket'

'Don't attack Chirac'

'Drop Acid, not bombs'

'NO I DON'T WANT TO BUY A WHISTLE'

'Dubya, ye fecker' (at Dublin protest)

'Pre-emptive impeachment' (Houston)

'Miss! They copied my dossier'

Bearded guy holding up a 'f**k men with beards' banner

'George Bush has a small PENIS'

'Bald Is Beautiful - No Bush'

'Stop this mad cowboy disease'

'Gardeners For Peace banner'

'Fluff Not Flak'

'WAR? Never. PEACE? Clever. POETRY? Forever!'

Tony Blair - walk with US, Not the US

'WORLD WAR FREE not WORLD WAR THREE'

'Smoke Bush, not Iraq'

'Don't mess with Messapotamia'

'We shaved our pubic hair: Read our lips: No Bush'

Fight plaque not Iraq' (on a big toothbrush)

'Go Solar, not Ballistic'

'Tony Blair Don't Be a Puppet to a Muppet'

'Clotted cream not ruptured spleen - Cornish ravers against the war'

'Down with this sort of thing' (on picture of plane dropping bombs), Dublin protest.

'America: shave your bush'

'Queer pagans against the war'

'Hedgehogs for peace'

'Legalise cannabis. OOPS WRONG DEMO'

'Toast bread not arabs'

Great List! More humorous also!
I love Brittish and Canadian humor !
I love the "special interest groups"Also the bush references.teehee
Bush said to us with what appeared to be an awful tatse in his mouth..."Protesters are part of the American way.BUT... I do NOT support special interest groups!"

protesters as a fringe special interest group!

Thanks for those Leo

I don't why Bush doesn't like special interests. He is one.

Glad to put a smile on your face Abbi!


A very dear friend of mine emailed them to me, and it seemed very appropriate to share them with you.