h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That's a dire sounding subject, sorry. I don't know why, but this is hard to post.

So for the last couple months, stupid things have make me anxious, like riding on a plane, but now even more stupid things. Like last week I tried a new mouthwash and went I had it in my mouth was suddenly terrified that it was going to kill me and spat it out and rinsed furiously. The last few days I've had really frightening physical symptoms; feeling like I can't breathe, dizziness, racing heart, adrenaline rushing, etc. It was so bad last night that I finally just took a taxi to the A&E (accident and emergency, yes?) because, as stupid as it sounds, I was worried I might die.

So it wasn't very busy, and everyone was very nice. The doctor indulged m worries and took some physical tests so he could, for example, show me a print out that showed my blood oxygen at 100%. I was not, in fact, going to suffocate. He told me that most likely I was having another depressive episode and told me to see a GP in the morning for help.

So I tried to find a GP in Kirkcaldy. Everyone here is full, so I just said 'f*ck it' and went to my old surgery. Long story short, I just finally lost it and I've been put on antidepressants. I'm to see him again in a week, and to call if I get worse.

I'm both relieved and disappointed. I'm glad there's nothing about my body that's dying. I've had 2 major depressions and I made it through. The bad part is that it had been 4 years since the last one, and this one didn't seem to have any obvious cause. It must be a lot of little problems. I also don't remember feeling so terrified, but then when I try to recall the other ones, I had family to babysit me 24/7 and now if something goes wrong, I can only pray that it's when James is home.

Anyway, I need to stop writing because I'm feeling really anxious.

Haylle, Hi! I am sorry to hear about your trip to A & E, and the reason for it... All I can say is that I hope there's something there someone can do to help. My sympathies!

"stupid things have make me anxious"

"suddenly terrified that it was going to kill me"

"can't breathe, dizziness, racing heart, adrenaline rushing"

"I also don't remember feeling so terrified"

Just based on what you described happening, you really don't sound to me like you were depressed - it sounds more like you've been having panic attacks.

Of course you could also be depressed, and the panic attacks could be related to depression...

I agree with Lady Scott that what you describe sound like 'classic' panic attacks and that they could be related to being depressed, though I'm not sure that being immediately put on anti-depressants like that was such a good idea.


az

i dunno..it's like constant rather than fits. i'm going back to the doctor today for help.

Just relax, petal. Despite the very bad reputation that anti-depressants have, I've seen them work on people very well.

These guys are medical professionals and will do there very best to make sure that you get the help you need to deal with problem.

In the meantime, have a and remember the first lesson: Breathe.

Yeah, because if you stuff up on that one, then you're not going to get to lesson two.

Sorry, was that a good taste failure?

No, I think it's kind of the point of the lesson.

Good. That's all right then.

I went to the doctor, and he gave me diazepam that will hopefully calm me down until the prozac starts to help. judging by how i feel, he may need to up the dose . At least i'm not freaking out, though i'm still really afraid i guess. If i can relax i might get a nap. he said that if i get worse, he's going to need to refer me to psychiatrist..he seemed to imply i might need a hospital stay. we can't have that now, i need to get better and fast.

I take it you've tried Rescue Remedy? Works a treat on me.

If you get really bad physical effects from a panic attack (which i do, often!) try carrying a paper bag around with you; breathe into it & re-breathe the air from it.Apparently one of the first effects of panic stuff is you hyperventilate & this counteracts it.

Another simple as hell but works trick is LOWER your shoulders; It is pretty damn near impossible to be as panicky if your shoulders are down, i think it stretches the ribcage or something, dunno, but it works.



zdt

i have rescue remedy somewhere

i called the doctor when i was in a state, and he let me take more. hopefully that will help. i feel well enough at least to type this. i need the okness to last several hours. i'm worried.

How are you feeling today?

Meanwhile, I should maybe point out that I'm not against anti-depressants per se, just that I personally feel they should be used less often than they seem to be these days and that they should very carefully monitored when prescribed.

For panic attacks I agree with the advice given here - first of all, don't forget to BREATHE, and we're talking calm deep-breathing as most of the scary physical feelings that accompany panic attacks are due to hyperventilating. Terri's suggestion to lower your shoulders is also a good one - it may sound 'simplistic' but if you concentrate on lowering your shoulders while breathing calmly you will probably see a noticable change. And a few drops of Rescue Remedy on the tongue (along with breathing and holding your body in a relaxed posture) can often reduce the panic very quickly.

Most importantly (in my experience - I've had panic attacks since I was 14) is to not *go into* the scary feelings. Concentrate on the breathing, posture, etc and force your mind to think of something else - preferably about the people you love (your kids, for example) and try to remember a pleasant moment with them. This helps break the cycle of the attack. A bit of 'distraction therapy'.

The other very important thing to always remember is that this feeling *will* pass. Remember that they have always passed in the past, that they didn't last forever, that you didn't die, all that. Like any illness it comes and goes.

Well, won't say any more for the moment.


az

Yes, distraction therapy helps. One method that worked for me was to focus on a word, any bit of written stuff you hapen to see, and try & make new words out of it. If i couldn't see any written stuff (unlikely!) i would count how many triangles i could see; silly things, bua as you say, anything to make you focus less on what you feel like.

Hope you are feeling better today Nyssa.

zdt

<>

You do that too, Terri? I find it helps a lot. And it takes many forms for me, depending on where I am when *panic* strikes. Having a mobile phone helps when I'm outside. I can either call someone or else simply start clearing out my old text messages - just focussing on something else and *ignoring* the feeling that I'm quite possibly going out of my mind - whilst breathing, breathing, breathing - is often quite a help.

Also, being touched and held by someone is a very good 'grounding sensation'.

I've never taken medication for the panic stuff other than the occasional extremely mild tranquilizer that helps 'take the edge off' the fear. But it's so mild that I sometimes wonder if it's the fact I believe it will work that helps me relax, more than the effect of actual drug. Likewise, I was once sent some Rescue Remedy by a dear friend of mine in Bristol and I often found that just clutching the bottle in my hand like a talisman and thinking of how much I love Lizzy would work just as well as using the stuff.

Which tells me that it *is* controllable. It just takes time to find ways that work for us.


az

Yes, i usually keep rescue remedy and my asthma puffer close at hand, & like you, just holding them & knowing they are there often means i don't actually need to use them.

The "being held" bit is lovely, very effective. Unfortunately don't have access to that option right now! however, Yoda is great for this; it's been proved that stroking an animal not only lowers *your* blood pressure, but also that of the animal!

So, nyss, try stroking the kitten; or even just watching the silly things playing is great distraction therapy! What's the kitty's name?

zdt

So now I feel mostly the depression crushing me, the doctor says, and I'll just have to wait it out. So long as I can keep the anxiety away, I suppose I can deal with this. This is now feeling familiar. i have to force feed myself meal shakes and tea. i can't do anything that requires moving from the couch. Typing this is a huge effort. anyway

my cats have been very nice and hovering about me and my kids have been sweet

From everything I know about depression, Nyss, it's a very complex illness and needs a very specific treatment.

If you are in fact suffering from either chronic or clinical depression then you need to talk to someone other than your GP.

Anti-depressants should never be prescribed without other therapy happening - you need to be able to talk as well as feel less 'weirded-out'. The drugs only help to stabalise you somewhat.

Meanwhile, at least try some of the 'panic attack' remedies suggested here. Can't hurt, might help.

And yes, keep eating. I once had to make myself to eat after realising once (I was maybe 22?) that I hadn't eaten for days. No drug therapy can help you if you aren't eating. So make food and eat it even if you don't feel like it - just as you are taking the anti-depressant drugs. Take the food like medicine. Because you need it.

And try to find a therapist you can talk to. You may need to try one or two out before you find someone you 'click' with, but it is fundamental that you don't just take anti-depressants without one-to-one therapy with someone you can talk to.


az