h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

No, this isn't a journal entry about Captain Pugwash.


Over the years we've had many uninvited visitors to our village. Many chickens , foxes, goats and bulls but this week a very surprising visitor has come to call, a black pig.


This little piggy (or not so little by all accounts) was once someone's pet and has been abandoned in the forest at my front door. It is black and bigger than my dog Fizz (that's about labrador size) and has been spotted by a few of the neighbours .... unfortunately, I've yet to set eyes on it.


One of the neighbours informed the police (I don't know why either) who thought it was a joke - then realised it might be a danger to traffic but I don't know what they've done about it ....


Bea blames 2legs ..... I don't know who to blame - what sort of a prat abandons a domestic pet in the forest to fend for itself.

What? Someone's abandoned a huge pig outside your front door and you haven't seen it?

Are you telling porkies?

Try and catch it. It can join The Marple Menagerie

I haven't seen it because there is a forest outside my front door.

Black pigs are particularly hard to find in a forest. I'm thinking of going in with some apples later and seeing if I can find it - the trouble is if I take the dogs they may find it and chase it and if I don't I may get lost (no sense of direction me) and never find myself let alone the pig.

Ahh - ambiguous sentennce - it's the forest that's at your front door, not the pig...

Leave some food scraps outside...

Entice it in with your ways...

And bingo - sausage and bacon to last a month!!

I thought it was a QI question

Interesting conundrum...

Succor the poor cuddly ,or carve it nice and thick to make tenderloin and chops!!!

In any case..you're right about the nastiness of the person who let the poor thing wander off...you and the Sisters should search the blighter out and have a Kangaroo Court trial!!!

By the way..nice to see you again,hunny!!!

I haven't seen it because there is a forest outside my front door.
I have a path
tell it you don't buy from door to door salesmen
if it was a black forest,it needs a wash

Well you'll all be delighted to hear the owner of the pig turned up .... lives up the road a way - not sure how the pig got out or how she made her way across the road and into the forest - but hey a couple of days of freedom didn't seem to do her much harm.


Now that is all resolved I can enjoy my bacon sarnie again.

You could buy some of this as well, Fizzy

http://www.firebox.com/product/2609/Bacon-Pop

Hmmmm, not entirely sure about that Mags, but I have tried Walker's new cheese n bacon crisps and they're nice enough.

Happy endings always get me right here...*burp*



Good you can enjoy yer fodder again...