h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Many's the dream I've had about the picturesque white chutch with a tall steeple that I used to attend when I was growing up. It had an elegant simplicity, and its location on a hill made it stand out.

So imagine my shock as I dreamed about returning to it for a service after all these years: a third of the pews at the back had been removed. The organ was gone, too. Poor turnout? Nobody cared about having music in the service?

There was no particularly cogent message in the sermon, but they really wanted to keep people coming back, so right after the collection, all kinds of goodies were handed around to the congregation: pizza, donuts, cookies. I don't remember fried chicken, but maybe they brought that out every *other* Sunday.

Paul, do you dream lots of the time or only when you're asleep?

Jab

and for the sermon? why not? i'm sure the boss upstairs wouldn't mind

i would hate to miss the organ though

The church used to have a *great* organ! That's why the dream was so upsetting. That, plus losing the back pews. Or, maybe the fattening food made the parishioners so big that the remaining pews had to be spaced farther apart so they would all fit.

i used to have a recording of e. power biggs playing 4 different organs at the same time from a joint keyboard placed in the center of a church or cathedral in germany or austria or something

biggs claimed bach would have used this if given the chance

i don't know, but the recording was quite impressive

Biggs was also fantastic with the music of Handel.

I have a feeling that the back pews were removed to make room for some stand-up guys.

Are we talking Mafiosi, or hairy-knuckle types who haven't evolved far enough to know about the option of sitting yet?

stand-up like david letterman? somehow i can't see him as a priest or anybody else church oriented

Since he knows his letters, he could teach the young ones.

i believe lots of parents don't allow their kids to watch his show

A lot of adults don't watch it either, because they need to go to sleep before it comes on.

i usually watch re-runs in the afternoon

I work almost every afternoon. Invalids and geezers might be able to see it in the afternoon, though.

i w*rk from 5.30am to noon

Yes, but you could still be an invalid and/or geezer.
Nowadays, with wireless technology and laptop computers, you work from home and be in bed the whole time.

valid point.

i know people who w*rk like that, but not me

shame, really. it's too cold to go outside atm