h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Yes, it has.

Six months ago, at this very time of day, my friend Robin died. It seems like it happened only yesterday but, at the same time, it is a lifetime ago. Then there are the times when it all feels like the bad dream that I wish it was.

Those of us who were there when he died share a common bond which no-one else can ever share. It is fair to say that, under the circumstances, we would prefer to have never forged such a union, but it is one which provides now, as it did back then, an extra little bit of comfort. A piece of my heart will live forever in each of the people who shared my tears on 14 April 2003.

The overwhelming grief which I experienced has subsided, but it is permanently imprinted on my soul and manages to surface every now and then. The intensity and frequency have decreased, but the memory is vivid.

During the last 6 months I have come to appreciate more clearly the value of family, friendship and the love and comfort which are naturally displayed and shared at such times. Those who know me best would, no doubt, recognise that I have been a lot more open and honest about my affections and feelings over the last six months than at any other time in my life.

In the days leading up to, and immediately after, Robins death, I also took a great deal of comfort from those of you in this virtual community who showed your support and shared in my grief. I may not have posted often but I lurked at every opportunity and was glad that very little seemed to have changed, except that a hell of a lot more hugs were being tossed about in my fan club. I'm not sure if I thanked you at the time, but I want to thank you now.

Thank You.

I know I wasn't there for a whole lot of it... but I is here now. So

It was the least we could do... and unfortunately the most we *could* do, especially at this distance.

I agree.

We wish we could have done more (by the way, did you get that pan of lasagna, fresh from the oven that I sent by way of regular mail to Australia? ) But at least we were able to be there for you over h2g2 and private emails.

It's not easy being a hemisphere away from friends. We *have* to get a working transporter. Makes giving hugs easier.

to ER

I'm disconcerted that you didn't recognize us to be there with you that day, in that room, and in those final hours, ER ... for in every sense, we shared in your tears, your heartache, and your pain. Do not think that, being unseen, we could not be present, for there is no time or distance in the spirit, or in love. These can reach across eternity.

~~~~~~~~

... If the dead can come back to this earth and flit unseen around those they loved, I shall always be near you; in the garish day and in the darkest night -- amidst your happiest scenes and gloomiest hours -- always, always; and if there be a soft breeze upon your cheek, it shall be my breath; or the cool air fans your throbbing temple, it shall be my spirit passing by ... do not mourn me dead; think I am gone and wait for thee, for we shall meet again ...

~Major Sullivan Ballou, killed a week later at The First Battle of Bull Run, 1861

She's right, you know...


Those of us who posted to you through that time weren't just tossing hugs around just because we didn't know what else to do with ourselves, we felt the agony of what was going on every bit as much as if we'd been there ourselves, even if we weren't let in on any of the details at the time. We didn't have to be there to *know* that it was one of the most difficult times you've ever experienced in your entire life, if not *the* most diffficult.

I know we don't see eye to eye on many things, and we *do* tease you mercilessly most of the time, but you are a friend, and we certainly couldn't pretend the situation was too far away to be involved in, or just "virtual" and therefore not even "real" enough to empathize with your entire situation.

Yeah!

I deliberately referred to this as a "virtual Community" because that is what it is, but I consider the friends I have made here as *very* real at not at all in the virtual category.

BTW, I only ever allow friends to tease me, those I don't like would receive a blast from which recovery would be highly unlikely.

s

Whew! Good to know that! By the way, will you be wearing the tux to the US when you visit? You know, we like our visitors to look debonaire...

Michele is right ... I'll pretend not to know you at the train station if you're wearing anything less debonaire than a tux ...

Debonaire people (such as myself) *do not* travel by train! I shall arrive by limousine, nothing less.

That's *very* good to know! Saves us a drive to the train station!