h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Abbeville, Louisiana - December 11, 2006

This is Cajun country. The Cajuns are of French ancestry and were rounded up in Nova Scotia and expelled in 1755. They settled in Louisiana and are known for fantastic crawfish gumbo and zydeco music, featuring the fiddle and the accordion.

There are lots of things to do here. There is the McIlhenny tobasco hot sauce factory to visit for a two-hour tour and the agrifactory where crawfish and rice are grown in the same fields. It takes three years to make the tobasco sauce. It's marketed in 100 languages and the entire world supply is produced on 2,300 acres on an island just a short distance away. Just down the road in Abbeville are eight municipal tennis courts (scores 6-0. 6-1 in favor of Mrs. Phred)

In Morgan City, 60 miles east, there is a 110 foot tower with 61 carillon bells cast in Holland (a photo op) and an oil rig museum.

The carillon bells are closed on Monday and the gates are locked, so we have crawfish gumbo and wait for the 2 PM tour of Mr. Charlie in Morgan City. Mr. Charlie is the first offshore drilling platform. It was constructed from 1952 to 1954. It’s a submersible platform capable of drilling in depths of up to 40 feet.

Mrs. Phred and I are the only people who show up for the 2 o’clock tour. The platform was retired in 1992 and sold for $10. It is currently used to train oil service workers. The company that sold the rig now pays the new owners thousands per worker to train new hires. The old rig is amazingly complex and I listen intently but only understand and absorb a small fraction of the drilling technology. This training program is said to have reduced oil rig worker turnover by 49 percent.

Today rigs float in place in deep water and thrusters keep them in position by monitoring GPS signals.

We are staying in Betty’s RV Park. Betty has a class act in a Louisiana bayou. She has 15 RV sites situated around her house. Every evening at 4 she has a social cocktail hour. We were advised by other travelers to stay here to get a taste of her gumbo, which is made from chicken, sausage, jalapenos and vinegar. I am told that her small RV Park is rated as one on the 25 best in the U.S.

I refuse to suck crawfish heads, but I really like the tails.

Oil rig photos, if you care....and Betty's backyard.
http://thefirecloudreport.blogspot.com/

I love crawfish tails too, but just can't see myself sucking the heads. Gumbo is one of my all time favorite soups/stews. Hyp made it for us when we visited her in San Antonio. Very tasty.

The RV Park sounds delightful. Enjoy.

When you say the training program reduced oil rig worker turnover by 49 percent, do you mean that it kept 49% more workers alive?

No matter how fine a point you put on it, some things are just undignified. Don't be a head sucker, boys and girls. It's as uncouth as spitting or farting at the opera.

Gumbo!

because spitting and farting in the movie theater or at a broadway show is ok? what about at an office party? At a family party? In a pizza shop? At a baseball game? Sorry, but I need to know these things before I end up in a situation and don't know what I'm allowed to do.

Farting is acceptable in all-male company at any time and always good for a laugh. Creating a blue flame from a fart is terminally but requires at least one accomplist.

Spitting is never acceptable under any circumstances except from the top of tall office buildings where there is heavy pedestrian traffic at the sidewalk level...people who open the door of their pick-up trucks to spit at intersections are just disgusting...

My gradfather, Franklin, had a spitoon in the corner of his living room. They placed a square piece of linoleum under it because his aim was notoriously bad..it's amusing how our norms change so quickly...first no spitting, then no smoking...I fondly remember getting on a jet with my own seat ashtray and an unscreened 1911A Colt .45 automatic in a shoulder holster...those were the days my friend....we thought they'd never end.

And I've heard it's less acceptable to belch in public too. What is the world coming to?

Phred, I have to disagree about spitting never being acceptable. At a baseball game it is practically mandatory. I will take your word for the skyscraper bit. Skyscrapers are ourside my realm of experience.

Leo, one of the best thing about a long-term marriage/relationship is that you can belch whenever necessary without embarrassment.

No smoking
No farting
No belching
No spitting
No scratching
No urinating from a standing position...


Sounds like a conspiracy?...thought so...

No head sucking

I can agree with that one.

"Proper Cajun ettiquette requires that all participants "pinch the tail and suck the head". Head sucking is a very integral part of the crawfish boiling ceremony, the head contains concentrated boiling juices and spices. Tear the tail from the main body of the crawfish, put the open ended torso of the crawfish in your mouth, bite down and suck hard. It may take some practice to avoid sucking down shell fragments but hey, ya gotta start somewhere!"

-Ugly Brothers Cajun Recipes

I was about to mention something about farting in bed and long-term relationships, but realized in the nick of time that this thread is in danger of spiraling completely out of control.

Well, let's just say that's one of the caveats of True Love....

I can't think of a thing to add.

I'm so glad you paused, Phred. It was getting unsuitable for women and children. Who was the first idiot to say "let boys be boys"?

Confucius? Aristotle?

The one I hated was "Let Reagan be Reagan." I wanted to hurl everytime someone said that.