This is the Message Centre for Shea the Sarcastic
My Horoscope For Today
elwood Posted Oct 18, 2001
*Replaces sharp pointy dangerous darts with suction cup ended ones*
Let 'er fly!
!!!splop!!!
Uh oh...sorry to have to tell you this, but we have to amputate.
My Horoscope For Today
elwood Posted Oct 19, 2001
I'm not sure you would want either of my eyes.
I'm pretty sure that I'm legally blind.
So you would have glasses with a normal lens and one as thick as a slice of bread!
My Horoscope For Today
T J: Mr. Shea Posted Oct 20, 2001
What bloody difference does it make what kind of bread! Did you forget we're talking about amputating my head here!? 
My Horoscope For Today
elwood Posted Oct 22, 2001
Some sourdough for you Shea...
...and some head cheese for you TJ.
Bon a petite!
My Horoscope For Today
T J: Mr. Shea Posted Oct 23, 2001
Fine! 
You two just sit there eating your bread and cheese while I sit over here and bleed all over everything. 
My Horoscope For Today
elwood Posted Oct 23, 2001
Um..could I have some more wine and less whine TJ.
Make that white not red there's enough red all over here.
My Horoscope For Today
Shea the Sarcastic Posted Oct 23, 2001
Mmm! Grilled head cheese and white wine ...
My Horoscope For Today
T J: Mr. Shea Posted Oct 24, 2001
The warmth and compassion eminating from this room is astounding!
Mmmmmm, grilled cheese..... 
My Horoscope For Today
elwood Posted Oct 24, 2001
What do you think we grilled the cheese on...the warmth and compassion in this room.
Uh...Could you stand back a bit your bleeding on my sammich!
My Horoscope For Today
elwood Posted Oct 25, 2001
The Steve Martin impression works better with an arrow through the head not a dart!!
Trust me I'm the "World's Worst Internet Impressionist" I've made all the mistakes!
My Horoscope For Today
elwood Posted Oct 29, 2001
*breathlessly*
"Happy Biiirthday, Ms. Sarcastic...Happy Birthday to you."
*elwood does a dead-on impression of Marilyn Monroe's birthday song
for President Kennedy right down to the sequined dress*
The dartboard sees a jail cell in elwood's future!
My Horoscope For Today
T J: Mr. Shea Posted Oct 30, 2001
::removes dart - replaces it with an arrow through the head::
Well excuuuussseee mmmeeeee!!!
Any better?
My Horoscope For Today
elwood Posted Oct 30, 2001
If you have a white suit I think you're set for a Halloween costume!
My Horoscope For Today
Shea the Sarcastic Posted Nov 1, 2001
Nice dress, elwood! You always do look lovely in gowns ...
My Horoscope For Today
elwood Posted Nov 1, 2001
Thanks! I thought I would go backless for a change.
Do you think it makes me look fat?
I commend you on having the guts to go as Lady Godiva this year!!
My Horoscope For Today
Shea the Sarcastic Posted Nov 1, 2001
I don't think it makes you look fat ... you've got all your curves in the right places!
You like my Lady Godiva costume? *twirls*
Oops! I guess I shouldn't have done that ...
Key: Complain about this post
My Horoscope For Today
- 61: elwood (Oct 18, 2001)
- 62: Shea the Sarcastic (Oct 18, 2001)
- 63: elwood (Oct 19, 2001)
- 64: Shea the Sarcastic (Oct 19, 2001)
- 65: T J: Mr. Shea (Oct 20, 2001)
- 66: elwood (Oct 22, 2001)
- 67: Shea the Sarcastic (Oct 23, 2001)
- 68: T J: Mr. Shea (Oct 23, 2001)
- 69: elwood (Oct 23, 2001)
- 70: Shea the Sarcastic (Oct 23, 2001)
- 71: T J: Mr. Shea (Oct 24, 2001)
- 72: elwood (Oct 24, 2001)
- 73: T J: Mr. Shea (Oct 25, 2001)
- 74: elwood (Oct 25, 2001)
- 75: elwood (Oct 29, 2001)
- 76: T J: Mr. Shea (Oct 30, 2001)
- 77: elwood (Oct 30, 2001)
- 78: Shea the Sarcastic (Nov 1, 2001)
- 79: elwood (Nov 1, 2001)
- 80: Shea the Sarcastic (Nov 1, 2001)
More Conversations for Shea the Sarcastic
Write an Entry
"The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a wholly remarkable book. It has been compiled and recompiled many times and under many different editorships. It contains contributions from countless numbers of travellers and researchers."