Journal Entries
I loathe the way this editor handles links!
Posted Aug 16, 1999
Why, look at how ugly it made my "Happy Dead Elvis Day" posting, immediately below! It's detestable! I'm for nagging them to upgrade the cgi scripts which run the editor to handle links in journal entries in a better way! What say you, fellow researchers? Should we unite in protest? Should we untie all our bootlaces? Should we kiss babies, and shake hands with detestable peasants so we can RULE THE WORLD?
My! I think YK-47 must be rubbing off! I hope my hamster doesn't die! 
*winks and Monshari*
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Latest reply: Aug 16, 1999
Happy Dead Elvis Day!!
Posted Aug 16, 1999
Yes, today is the day on which Elvis Aaron Presley (a.k.a. "The King") died 22 years ago (1977). How are you spending it?
I've been doing my usual stuff (watching television, playing about on the computer, playing about with myself) and I plan on going out and eating lots of fatty food (Grecian Gyros, full of lamb and feta cheese!) and indulging myself in giving extraneous advice to nubile young women.
An entity on a mailing lyst I'm on (das Lyst!), has sent me several interesting links of commemoration, including How Elvis is like Jesus, and the First Presleyian Church of Elvis as well as a group of people who believe that they will eventually be able to communicate with extra-terrestrial Elvis fans!
Personally, I think Elvis was human- though Divinely inspired. What do YOU think?
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Latest reply: Aug 16, 1999
News Flash!
Posted Aug 13, 1999
Andrea Dworkin, in an excess of envy over our lovely Ms. Fenchurch's well-kept chin-whiskers (Dworkin can only get one hair to grow, and that's out of a pimple!) has KIDNAPPED our future Ms. Bearded H2G2 2000! She is being re-programed by "womens studies" professors, who are trying to convince her that she's being "exploited" by being given the chance to teach the world that bearded women can be beautiful too!
"I don't like it. They just love her for her beard. We love her for her soul!", Dworkin replied to inquiries on the abduction, "I just can't stand to see all those shallow men enjoying themselves with Fenchurch's beard, without a thought to all the pain and agony she suffers having to keep the thing up!"
When it was pointed out that men, do indeed know the "pain and agony" of beard upkeep, Dworkin looked confused for a moment, then replied, "But men don't menestrate!"
"Could you imagine having to shave, AND menustrate?"
Fenchurch was unavailable for comment, as she is being kept in a dark hole the other side of Surry until she's "forced to re-evaluate her world posistion, and abandons the vertical-thinking imposed on her by males, and embraces the lateral-thinking (and the hairy anuses) of her sister-sufferers!".
-SCREWTERS sometime in July, 1999
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Latest reply: Aug 13, 1999
How I didn't meet Madonna...
Posted Jul 31, 1999
2nd time was easy, I just walked pass her and minded my own buisness.
She was with a couple of dapper bodyguards, lucky wench! I DREAM of having lovely 6'-plus women to beat off the uglys, feminazis, and other undesireable pigs! *sigh* Now THERES heaven m'lad! THAT'S what money is good for- keeping people you don't like WELL AWAY from your person!
First time, I had to miss a poetry reading a Cafe Diem. I think I went out and did something useful like a spoon of boy or something.
Not that I don't think Madonna would give good head or anything...
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Latest reply: Jul 31, 1999
How I didn't meet the Chili Peppers and Pearl Jam..
Posted Jul 28, 1999
Yes, I SHOULD have met them, since I was downstairs in the bar partying with Al Jourgenson, Jesus and Mary Chain, and up in the rooms with Sharkbait getting stoned.
However, those twits were up in their own rooms all night long. Most likely playing with themselves or something. No surprise, really. Like I said, celebrities are a lot of boring twits, and lets face it, would YOU want Eddie Vedder sucking your dick? I didn't think so. I know I don't want him sucking mine.
That fat-lipped chick with the J & M Chain looks like she could give good head, though.
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Latest reply: Jul 28, 1999
Baron_Shatturday
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