h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hi Mr Wumbeevil!!!
Just thought I'd wander over to see if your page actually had anything left unmoderated... it seems our jukebox thread has been permanently removed, can't think why

Anyway, I'm impressed to see most of it still intact...unless you just retyped it all?

How are you by the way? Did you know you can buy Cadbury's Snowflake Easter Eggs

Tink.

Hiya Tink

Nice to see the Minister of Jelly survived the coup burning even if the secrets of milk jelly and the rest of the ministry didn't. They'll be moderating these threads forever if they keep up this level of censorship. Stiill, I don't think it will make the Jukebox any less intelligible if half the postings vanish.

You're obviously a good fairy, I can't see anything missing from your homepage.....mainly because it's not there to see, but that's beside the point.

The only thing I lost from the old home page was the Jimmy McNulty's Bonnie Scotland link, despite the s removing 100YO poetry as copyright material. Now people searching for Jimmy McNulty will also find a gay guy in New York or somewhere.

I haven't seen a Snowflake Easter Egg, I haven't even seen a snowflake since last year. Have they been withdrawn? The shopkeepers I've asked just think there are problems in the supply chain. Rumours abound that a fairy is buying up all stocks direct from the factory..

Did you see that site featuring a Peter Pan who was looking for his Tinkerbell? If you've been able to sleep at night you obviously haven't.

...and are you the Good Fairy of Leeds Car Park yet?

*grins at Wumbeevil*


*looks sad as she recalls her ministry*
I don't understand it...it's not like everything was copyrighted! It's just gone...lost to the abyss of internet jelly sweets... Besides, I seem to recall that the secret of milk jelly was to do with not leaving it in a hot place and not allowing me to make it
*laughs*
The jukebox has gone completely!!! In fact, it has been pointed out (even by several people who had never been in that thread, apparently it became notorious?) that it's no suprise it's been moderated! I mean really... it wasn't that bad, kinda!

My homepage is back now I think... my pictures have gone...and my shiny fairy parade/swan on a rollerskate has been removed but other than that I think it's still there, unlike my ministry Besides, I hope you're not implicating that if you could see it I'd no longer be a good fairy?

Besides, I found a post yesterday which broke some of the moderation rules...
*looks around in a stealthy fashion*
And it was written by an italic! And I was going to moderate them until I realised that they weren't a moderator so that spoiled my fun Only Bagpuss got moderated for singing in Welsh which was funny

No, see the Snowflakes eggs are real honest! I've seen them I didn't buy one though...

What site's that?
*looks suspicious*

*grins*
You remembered! Hehehe, I have the job but I don't start just yet

Hiya Tink, thought I'd give you a tinkle, and you do get fairy rings, don't you? Err, that wasn't a personal question btw OUCH!

We're gonna be in trouble shortly as there are only a certain amount of combinations we can make from five letters....and of course a good fairy wouldn't dream of cheating and using the asterisks as wild cards to make girners, etc.

Still in the throes of moving house before they knock the old one down (no I don't mean me TYVM). Got a microwave on Friday so at least I can eat something other than pot noodles now. Still to entice Wummenbeevil to move in with me, but a gallon of petrol on her bed followed by a match should do the trick. It's either that or nick the No Digital box and the TV, but she maintains a guard on them so she can watch Poirot and every toon known to man. Who said romance was dead?

I don't understand how the jukebox can have gone completely, wasn't there a single posting that would pass the "nun" test? Of course I didn't read the entire backlog when you corrupted me into joining, so I can only presume that the earlier postings are responsible for its notorious reputation.

I've been looking for the Snowflake Easter Eggs, but haven't seen a single one. That's the first time I've tried to hunt down an Easter Egg before they slash the prices (Easter is always a few days late for my nieces and nephews!).

I've suffered from the discrimination against native British languages as well. Apparently they don't like the Gaelic for "Who was that sheep I saw you with last night?" I guess I'll just have to resort to my native Glaswegian, nowhittamean Jimmy? Punnaburrafurramurra.

Oh yeah, I think I've followed the rules on this. On my home page you'll find an entry "My Links" and there you will find a Peter Pan who is in search of a Tinkerbell. I'm sure he'll set your wings all aflutter.

prrp

prrrrrrp

MUAHAHAHA!

*runs and hides in a fairy parade, though he didn't think fairy's had that sort of magazine*

*sounds of snigr-ing lurker are heard in the Bushes*

OK I drew the short straw.

Hark! Was that a snigrer in the bushes or was it a PC jaw dropping, "Oh look Nigel, he'll be using words like bitch next and pretending he's talking about his pet Doberwoman".

Has anyone seen my rich bitch? She's just inherited more money from her Aunt Lassie after a tragic accident on the set of "Lassie and the Combine Harvester Plot".

"Told you so, Nigel"

Nigrs to you all, I say. Sorry I've got a sig mind, not to mention an unfortunate speech impediment, and that's how I get my kigs.

Do you know what you have here (above)? The longest known posting ever posted by a Tinkerbell! It's Guinness Record's time m'friend!
I rsign.

Ummmm...
JW...

I didn't post that he did? Besides I'll have you know that I've posted waaaaay more than that, pages and pages before. There was a time when I was at the top of the longest posting list everyday...
*suspects she may have missed something here*
Aaah well

oh dear, oh bother..

I had never seen a Tink-post as long as #3 before, and just thought Wumbe should be proud to be on the receiving end. I usually only get a *wave* or a 'fruit pastille' or the unfulfilled promise of a Richard Burns story.

Sorry if you got the wrong end of the stick Tink - please bear in mind for future reference I never mean to do anything but amuse and occassionally elucidate in all my postings at h2g2. When you stumble cross any of my other failures just ignore them and remember I mean well. I really, really do.

peace
~jwf~

...as in Wumbeevil gradually rgins his composure.

*waves*

*grins*

Falls about laughing again.

Believe her John, please believe her. I remember at least one thread grinding to a halt because the postings were taking so long. I freely admit, 'twas eye who blinked.

Well, it was more like RSI crippled my typing finger trying to keep up. No wonder they made her Minister for Jelly. Any reporter trying to ask awkward questions about the EU Jelly mountain will get talked over at 300 wpm. Once they gave Tink tranquilisers so she could commentate on horse racing, but the race got abandoned as none of the field had any hind legs after 100 yards.

I'm dead.

..as in may I offer you a ginsr, you look like you might need it.

I hate to think thou art in trouble deep on my account. I do thank you for the defense counsel but I have been swatting at fairies all my life. It's only fair the odd one gets the best of me.

Ach, not to worry John. I'll just singr a little song and Tink'll forgive me.

Hey we're going to ....uh oh. Now I am in trouble, I can't sing to her as it'll get lifted for copyright infringement.

HELP!!!!!

Quick find a song she likes that's out of copyright.....



And did those wings in ancient times
Flutter over England's mountains green?
And was the Jelly Minister
On England's pleasant pastures seen?
And did her countenance divine
Shine forth upon our clouded hills?
And were Jelly Tots builded here
Among these white chocolate mills?

Bring me my snowflake without mould!
Bring me my pastilles of desire!
Bring me my sweets! O packs, unfold!
Don't set my curlywurly on fire!
I will not cease from dental plight,
Nor shall my treets melt in my hand,
Till we have ate all of em
In England's green and pleasant land.

(William Blake 1757-1827)

He's back!

Hey, that's my good side, don't knock it. And where did that Manuel-type accent come from, Meesta Anty. Have you changed your name to Kaye?

Hi Amy , nice to see ya. Sorry, I got into all those interior design progs, got hooked on paint fumes, went to the English Sheepdogs, and ended up in the Dulux Clinic to dry out. There I was for a month, surrounded by folks in white coats with just a hint of primrose. But I'm glad to say I'm all right now.

Must go, my Changing Rooms Souvenir Boxed DVD set is calling.

*laughs and tries to look annoyed*
You know I hate to admit it but that songs quite good...
*realises how to annoy Wumbeevil*
Thankyou!
*hugs and passes him some strawberry milk jelly*
hehehe...

But if I wasn't revising at the minute I'd obviously type a much longer and more annoyed response...maybe next week, until then I'll just put it proudly on my home page

*grins at Amy and passes her a *
By the way thank you so much!!! I had my Mansfield Park (Return Of The Native too but it's best not to mention that ) exam yesterday and the things you told me the other week really did help me

Eeek!

*grins*
At that's another one for the record books, the shortest Wumbeevil posting ever

Why does milk jelly make the Wumbe go eek? Do other dairy-based confections have similar effects (that nearly came out as diary-based confections but the Wumbe is not Jeffrey Archer... or is he?).

*pushes a raspberry flavoured blancmange in the direction of Wumbeevil in the interests of scientific endeavour*

I'm glad my ramblings on Mansfield Park were of help. Don't give up on Ms Austen. It amazes me how much she can still say to us nearly 200 years after her death.