h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Hey Trillion's a winner! She got busted for telling it like it is. Right on sista ho. You is down wit it! Gimme five. Now git your black *** back into that kitchen and git us some coffee. And none dat cafe au lait crap, I like it black.

I made it
I've arrived
I'm a success at last
They removed my post.
(They've still got a picture of me in the bottom right hand corner tho)
I'm going to complain about their colour prejudice.

UNFAIR TO GREEN PEOPLE

TUTTUTKAT

I never saw it, I suppose I'll have to wait on it being reinstate...

Oh no, what if she doesn't get reinstated? Could my fragile male psyche cope with on of the Ladies being the first to get the cherished Golden Award.

Yeah well, I suppose it could. Congrats Trillion, your waters have broken and now we must all wait expectantly (smokers may wait expectorantly) on the outcome. Is it gonna be a Gold or a Silver ?

Right on Massa. One black coffee coming up.
*Fills coffee grinder with sennapod and bustles around making jwf a VERY strong cuppa*

*stands back. Spots a handy chemical warfare suit (one careful owner) in the corner and dons it*

Errr, I think I'll pass on the coffee Trill.

*stares at jwf's unwitting botty through his field glasses*

*Passes the coffee to jwf, who passes the coffee*

*Wumbeevil wonders if he's forgotten to remove the lens caps. Suddenly he feels a warm sensation penetrating the suit*

Damn flies!

We have crossover

*Crackle, Fizz*
TEFKAT hits the snooze button on the bedside clock and wonders why there's so much electricity in her hair today.

"It's lice Jim, but not as we know it"

*Yes, we have a serious crossover situation here*

Triumph (has the *** for the way you ***)

"Omigod Sir. . .she's breaking up. . .I can't hold her. . .

You're on form tonight anyway.

On the naughty girls' form which is sent to the headmistress each morning, I mean.

What lice? Capitus, corporus or pubis? Hey I'm decrepit, I'm remembering this stuff from 20 years ago and don't know their fancy new-fangled names. I have the latter two and am now going for my hat-trick.

Triumph, ah yes they made motorbikes - they flopped.
Triumph, ah yes they made cars - they flopped
So let's pick a good name for a bra company, eh?

*One of Trillions legs goes flying out the window*

That's strange. I didn't know we had any windows. Oh well, I suppose it'll let jwf's contribution to the decor out.

*looks at Trillion just as her left arm floats off in the general direction of down*

Pull yourself together woman.

*breathes a sigh of annoyed relief*

Phew.. do the asterisks count or do I have to have it totally removed to qualify? *laughs* I could just write something in Dutch.. Hmm.. *ponders that for a moment* Bah.. got better things to do with my time dank u wel.. Tot straks,

Little B.

Watch out for those asterisks, they can literally turn you into a f**kwit. Yeah, what I'm saying is don't let them f**k wit you (just in case they fill the first one with more *s). Still, I suppose asterisk you take.

Well if I got away with Latin, I don't see what's so wrong with Dutch. Munchkin tells me they don't like Portuguese though. Hmm, do you think that if they blocked Dutch, that would cap it all? If they blocked Yankee Imperialist Pigdogma would that capitol?

What about a little bit of Gaelic cursing?

Och naw, ma bonnie wee sheepy's ran aff wi' a Sassenach.

Slainge

*screams and runs away*

I hate clowns.. There's something I don't like about people that like to drop their trousers at kid's parties..

Little B.

Look what they did to my post in another thread, in a BORING (to others I mean) private conversation. . .

Well, we dag**s do tend to fly off the handle sometimes. It's all that hot Latin blood y'know
Thanks for all the . The buttercream was lovely

Why can't I call myself a dayglo? I demand rights for all dayglos.

. . .And mops. I mean woks.
Drat. They've got to my keyboard now

Trill you know how you claim that button in the corner as your own? It's becoming known as Linda.

Hark! Was that a throaty roar I heard?

Yeah I find my keyboard goes like that when I'm drunk as well. The keys just won't stay still.

You're not allowed hot Latin blood in here you know. Oh no, it encourages s it does. When the Romans left you should have seen the mess they left behind them, bloodsuckers everywhere. Worse than mourning doves it was.

...and Little B, I think I'd be dropping my trousers frequently as well, if I wore shoes that size.

*the flipflop sound of size 7 feet inside 'come and get me girls' size 13 shoes echoes through the room as Wumbeevil goes to the window to look for Trillion's leg. Then he realises it'ld be easier to find the other one as it's still attached to her*

The only thing worse than clowns is Barney, the dorky purple dinosaur character. My old ears could not believe what they heard when (well beyond the peak of his new found popularity a few years back) I took an opportunity to observe his (its) TV show. (Note to moderator: I am not making this up. It's a quote from the show's opening, followed by the screams of hysterically overstimulated kids.)
The show began "He's big! He's purple! And children love him!" *yay* I switched it off, shocked, horrified.
Dirty old men used to be locked up for lines like that. I could not believe that women - in fact, two mothers - created this creature. Have you seen the size of his feet? Puts 'Big Bird' to shame. I won't even mention his tail!

Hi peeps. Just thought I'd drop by. I notice you guys have had trouble with the moderators, so if anyone wants to send a message to them, paste the following into your homepage

Hi Orcus. Nice one,err two, err..four, Orcus. The deed is done.

The good thing about this place is that it's deliberate. Have you seen the article Sal Mugwump's just had hooked? It must have taken a while to write ....and then along comes a .....

Liked the Barney jwf. Get a talking one, get half-wrecked and then mix with some deliberate misinterpretations. Voila, Wumbeevil's Xmas, Big Purple Barney shooting his mouth off.

OK take it away

Must look for Sal...
The Incredible Sulking Pillowcase (MkII- version) is in high dungeon as well. No wait.. 'dungeon' ..that's not the right word. Tha's the South Afrika au-pair tights thing blocking my mamary - oh ..it's high ..uhm..stantchion ..no ..damn. Let's just say he has taken exception to the new rules - seems to think the ThotPoli are being heavy handed. All of his travel entries have disappeared (an encyclopedia of adventures I had only begun to explore) because of the Afrikans and African dialects and place names quoted. Oh bother sayeth the Pooh.

Good one Orcus.. I have put the splendid chappies beneath the [removed by the moderators] part of my home page

*reminds herself never to go to one of Wumbe's parties.. but still might invite him to one in York some day*

hehehe

Little B.