h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Wow.. this stuff is strong... going straight to my head...

Join me in a song blu... oh... looks like she's passed out... hope she doesn't snore... hic!!! Oooopppss... excuse me...

Hey Spiny, can I have some more please... pretty please... pretty please with bells on...

*chains rattle in the distance, coming closer, closer, close... entering the room*

Hi SPINY!!!

'member me? 'course you don't... Last time I was around here, I wasn't all that skinny... HAHAHAHAHA!!!!
I'm still managing the SETI@home pages over here, though, and I do still live in Holland... Does that ring a bell?

Now if you have a nice cold glass of milk for me, I'll just scatter my bones somewhere way back in a corner, where I won't scare the rest of your visitors.

Nooo... come and join us, you know most of us I think... hic!!! ... ~slightly lop-sided grin~ ... I'd give you some of my drink, but Spiny is being a little... hic!! ... excuse me... now where was I... oh yes...

Hmmm...

hic!!

Grief, you are thin... you should eat a doughnut or ten!!!... look at me... not a rib in site... hic!!

Hmmm... ~grin~

Come here often???

hic!!

My God! It's Festival! You don't look at all well, my boy - have these extra terrestrials been doing some experiments on you? As Greebo says, have a doughnut, in fact, have ten doughnuts. SOMEONE brought enough to see us through to the end of next millenium *indicates semi-comatose dragon singing to herself on floor* Shall we call you Skeleton from now on? And if we give you some milk, won't it run out all over my carpet?

Oh well, Greebo, lets draw a discreet veil over the hair underneath, shall we? I've gone all red now.

But - diluting malt whisky doesn't waste it at all. All the experts will tell you that adding water actually brings out the flavour. There's also the benefit that it goes further. Of course, some people like it fiery straight from the bottle, but you can really only do that with the 70 proof stuff. You can buy 100 proof which is just too strong to enjoy without diluting. At the Scotch Malt Whisky Society, where my pal has just become a member (and is taking me there tonight, in fact), the bottles they sell are 100 or more proof, and every table has a jug of water on it. I don't want to tell you how to drink it, but a lot of people don't realise that whisky and water are meant to go together and diluting, far from wasting it, changes it in beneficial ways. Okay, speech over. You can still have it neat if that's how you like it.

Oh - in case I'm not here when blu comes round, could somebody thank her for the Ie3 link, which answered a few questions and coincidentally put me in touch with somebody else on h2g2 in another branch of the Evil Employer's empire.

Mmm, time for a coffee now, I think. Moira and I tanned a bottle of champers last night for our twelfth anniversary, so I'm a wee bit fuzzy today.

[dragon raises head slightly from floor]

*thin wisps of greenish smoke curl upward from one nostril*

ohhhhhh...

ohhh...

Oh?

hello there festiva/skeleton/ace! Sorry I'm not quite myself today. Good to see you here though.

Congratulations to you and Moira, Spiny!

An' if there are any more doughnuts let Greebo have them. For that matter, if there is any SCOTCH *urp* left--let her have that too.

I will jus' take a l'il nap today. My typist will be busy with the Thanksgiving holiday dinner, so I will have to wait until she is done with all that. When I try to type it gets really confusing.
An' I think I am traveling north on Friday. So I prob'ly wont see you till Monday, Spiny.
[curls up in compact ball, tail over nose]

zzzzzz...
*snort*
zzz....
*snix*
ZZZZZZZ......

}:=8

My God, is there anything louder than a snoring dragon? We'll have to go over to your place Greebo if we want to be able to talk. I SAID WE'LL HAVE TO...HANG ON.
*Rolls balled-up dragon into shower room, covers her with fluffy white towel, closes door*
There. It only sounds like distant thunder now.
Yes well. Twelve years. "Do you think we'll still be together in another twelve years?" Moira asked me. I pointed out I'd be 57. She went a little pale.
Let's have another round of whisky and not think about these things.

PS In case you don't come to before I go, blu, have a good Thanksgiving weekend, and don't drink too much *sniggers in an unattractive way*

Hi Spiny, Greebz, Dwaggie!

*shouts: YO DWAG, CAN YO LOWER THAT ROAR A BIT, PLEASE???*

So, Spiny, you *do* dismember (sic) me... great! Congrats from me ads well on your 12th. Yeah, the milk will spill through my lower jaw, just like cola would. That's the main reason for me not to use any 'spirited' stuff, btw; would be abuse of spirits... *haunting laughter*
Anyway, you better lay some plastic in that dark corner over there. Then when I want to 'bibe something, I'll just go over there where it won't disgust you so much, what with the darkness and all that.

Yuppo Greebz, I've been here before, but that was long before I lost all that weight. I still clearly dismember having tea and biscuits with Spineless and Dwaggo. *spooky grin*
I've kicked the donut-habit. Wanna know why? See this massive *void*, where my stomach once *was*?? That's why! The only reason for faking the ability to drink is that I just can *not* kick *that* one.

Hullo Dwaggie, missed me? (She'll hear... even when vast asleep you won't get around a dwaggie without them hearing you). Wish your typist a happy Thanksgiving for me, will you?

Hi Spiny, Greebz, Dwaggie!

*shouts: YO DWAG, CAN YO LOWER THAT ROAR A BIT, PLEASE???*

So, Spiny, you *do* dismember (sic) me... great! Congrats from me ads well on your 12th. Yeah, the milk will spill through my lower jaw, just like cola would. That's the main reason for me not to use any 'spirited' stuff, btw; would be abuse of spirits... *haunting laughter*
Anyway, you better lay some plastic in that dark corner over there. Then when I want to 'bibe something, I'll just go over there where it won't disgust you so much, what with the darkness and all that.

Yuppo Greebz, I've been here before, but that was long before I lost all that weight. I still clearly dismember having tea and biscuits with Spineless and Dwaggo. *spooky grin*
I've kicked the donut-habit. Wanna know why? See this massive *void*, where my stomach once *was*?? That's why! The only reason for faking the ability to drink is that I just can *not* kick *that* one.

Hullo Dwaggie, missed me? (She'll hear... even when vast asleep you won't get around a dwaggie without them hearing you). Wish your typist a happy Thanksgiving for me, will you?

Cripes... is there an echo in here?????

Do you mind if I have a little nap as well... need my beauty sleep... ~yawn~... ~curling up on seat~ ...

Remember to save some of that milk for me... think I will need it when I wake up... sometime in the next millennniummiummiiummm... ~can never work out how to stop spelling that... rather like banananananananananananas ain't it...~

Hmmmmm... ~quiet purring~

Shit, that echo... sometimes the connection here is very crappy, and then after clicking the "Post Message" button, I get an error about something being wrong with the connection. When that happens, I go back one page, and make a copy of the contents of the posting-field.

Then I return to the forum to check if my message has come in (reload), and usually I find it didn't get through. Then I repost the whole thing, and when I return later, I find the message posted TWICE!

Sleep well, Greebz... Hey, what's that... you's a kitty too? You oughta come to http://www.h2g2.com/forumframe.cgi?forum=24810&thread=29308 to play with Lisa and Jinx.
I breed mice there, and I serve fresh meat, chicklets, fish and lots of milk

~tired yawn~... Hey stop rattling those bones... me's sooooo tired...
~raising one eye-lid~... will check out your friends when I wake up, must warn you though, me a veggie cat...
~head drops to paws.. delicate snore~

MORNING ALL, I...oh sh*t, they're all asleep.

*tiptoes over to put kettle on, whispers softly to self*

Boy, do I need this cup of tea. No hangover, though - got away with it for a change. That Malt Whisky Society could be a dangerous place. Good grief, Greebo's been out on a spree - I don't know how many mice she'd have to catch to make that pile of bones...

*puts headphones on so's Radio 3 doesn't disturb anyone, sits down to mull over Skelly's posting comments*

Mogge!

I'm awake, thank you very much!

Now can I have some tea too, please? I'll spill it neatly on the plastic over in that dark corner, ok?

What do you say? Greebo's a she too? Are all cats female here on H2G2?
Anyway, I don't think a veggie cat, whatever its gender, would chace and kill mice. Veggies don't do that sorta thang!

*mumbles to self...*
And if she did, I wish she'd chase and roast Nonnie... that darn mouse tried to mess up my appartment. Now the mousecage is padlocked. It just won't happen again...

OKAY, SKELLY, HERE'S SOME NICE HOT TEA TO WARM *realises he's still got headphones on and is yelling, removes them* Sorry, here's some tea to warm you up (some chance of that!) *checks to see if Greebo's awake* Yep, Greebo's a lady, don't we make a nice foursome - a hedgehog, a dragon, a cat and a skeleton. We ought to go out dancing together sometime!

So what happened to you while you were away? Or is it a Hallowe'en costume you just got attached to?

Sorry about your apartment, but at least you didn't sit in a pile of doughnuts....

Nice couple we are indeed! What happened to me? I did a weightwatchers therapy (non-voluntary ofcourse). I guess I just *overwatched* my weight a bit...

*spills hot tea through lower jaw*

DAMN, I *hate* that! Well, I'll have to keep pretending I guess...

Doughnuts you say... I had to introduce 'em to my home myself. Greebz paid me a visit, and didn't care for mice or meat, but she had to have something with her milk, right? And since I don't believe in small volume purchases... well, you get it, don't you?

HAHAHAHAHA!

I like it here... I'll 'stick around' for a while.

*loses some bones, which whirl around the room and then return to self*

~very lady-like stretch~
Hmmm... oh hi Spiny, nice to see you back... ~grin~... your fronts not bad either...

You making some tea??? Milk for me please... would be purrrrfect me thinks...

Morning, oh boney one... or is it afternoon??? I have trouble remembering stuff like that... tend to nap at all sorts of strange hours...

How about something to eat with that milk Spiny... am kinda hungry again... got a fast met... met... metat... er... well got something very fast anyway...

*choke, gasp*

cant post here...

browser cant handle long threads, dunno why...crashes

have started new thread: 'No more milk' http://www.h2g2.com/forumframe.cgi?forum=6380&thread=29855

am going to talk to PTB about problem

*gasp, strangle*

hope ...I ...will ...see ...you ...all ...soon...

}:=8

Ohhhhhhh... poor blu... what shall we do... Lookeee... me can rhyme too... ~smirk~

Hey, Greebo, follow blu's link and see my interesting proposal for this evening

Me already gone... see vanishing cat... proberly something to do with being related to that old geezer the Cheshire Cat... see you there Oh Sharp One... ~kiss~