Stupid maps

Look. It doesn't matter who I am, and yes I know my skin looks like it's made of rubber, IT'S NOT A SUIT!! Many a little child have lost their petty human lives trying to bounce on my belly. We Vogons take pride in our girth. All I want to know is how to get off this planet and on to the nearest intergalactic highway, so that I could give a good shouting to whoever made this map, and perhaps blow up this planet and replace it with... Well... No, just blowing up the planet should be sufficient to make me gurgle with joy. Your planet's one rewarding feature is this 1-800-DIAL-A-MATTRESS, those delivery men are expert hunters, how do they managed to kill all those mattresses without even so much as breaking a sweat. In return for your mattresses I have decided to bless you unworthies with my poetry, perhaps I'll endulge you with a little number now; I call it, "My name is Ted." My name is Ted I like to shout I like to scream I like to spout But I do not like Sour kraut (on my hot dogs that is)

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Imperial Master Chief Vogon Officer Ted

Researcher U33290

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