h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

I'm up still. Your last post somehow got lost in a tub of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter...

Nigel said that he was a good mate, Nigels mates are usually upstanding horsizans of the society. I didn't realise he meant his drunken daredevil mate from college.

*Watches circling horse*

One horse, two horses...

Is it possible to fall asleep counting horses? I mean, there's only two of them and one of them only just counts.

What if s come in the night? That's what usually happens, isn't it? You could wake up stuck in a stone or something. I'd probably be a frog. Badgers will eat me!

Hope they enjoy you too...

*Sulks*

Are knights of the round table allowed to sulk? I'm sure that's not in the manual ...

*Gets out squire's manual*

Hmmm ... "What to do if your liege knight starts sulking." Hmmmmm.

Blimey. Are they sure? All right then ...



Sorry, liege. That's what it says in the book.



Sorry. That's there too.

Cripes!

<biggr...

Nope, fallen out with you now.

Are knights of the round table allowed to fall out with ...

*Checks the squire's manual again*

"What to do if the advice on sulk-response falls through and, in combination with an inappropriate use of the 'smiley' smiley as attached to a childishly flippant question on WJH, your knight falls out with you:

"1. There is no point grovelling. Knights don't like it and may sack you on the spot

Rats.

"2. There is no point in attempting to get back in your knight's good books with flattery. Knights know they're brill and don't need to be told it

Doublerats.

"3. If all else fails, open the box marked 'Squire's Companion' and try that."

Right

Er ... choccy pudding, m'liege?

Choccy pudding?

Wait a minute, there's that smiley again. How do I know whether you're being genuine or winding me up with a nonexistant pudding?

*Sulks*

Oh, right ...

Choccy pudding, m'liege?

Oo, no, that's not right.

Choccy pudding, m'liege?

I bet those flowers are from a clown. Probably swuirt me with water as soon as I get near.

Meant to do that!

They're not Honest.

I mean, you know me and ... them. The ... those people. The 'circus entertainers'. It's not very likely, is it?

All right - try this.

Ready?

ready

1 - 2 - 3 - 4

The squire is sorry!
He let his liege down badly and he's sorry!
He wants to know if any choccy puddy
Would help his name to stop being quite so muddy?

Who? Oh, you mean these: http://rsb.info.nih.gov/ij/images/clown.jpg





Alright, alright, you're forgiven.

Now give me the key to your pantry.

*click*

tumtitum, tumtitoodle ... come on ... tumti

Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah!!!

No!

I'm sorry.

Look, here's a badger picture to make it up to you: http://www.funfolly.com/g/mascots/cc197mud.jpg

'Snot fair *tremblylip*

See the windy uppness of a misplaced smiley?

http://www.distlab.dk/badger/img/badger-photo.jpg

Better?

I'm definitely off now. G'night.

Waaaaaa...

Oh!

Aaawwww

Thanks!

Night then!

Hail liege! Hail, Lady of Badgers!

(Not to be confused with a baglady - we've already got one of those, in the nicest possible way of course ).

How's it going? *cough* How art thou?

Ah - I just read WJH. Not brill then?

*Waves the magic staff of pritt at Flantselot's nostrils*

Oh wondrous cure-all!
Pritt art thou called:
There's nothing so gloomy
That's not by thee appalled!

I just want everyone to know that We're only making plans for Nigel. We only want what's best for him.