h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

How would you feel if you asked for some help in a game, and one of the players turned round and told you it was easy, as if you were some sort of fool, without knowing you of course. And in those circumstances, which one of the two would not only be rude and hurtful, but would be the fool?

I would feel hurt Jabs, of course. *sends a gentle hug*

I'm going to send you some smileys too!

Jabs, was this question a hypothetical? Is hypothetical the right word? Do I need a little help here?

In any event, and in my opinion, if someone asks for help it is the height of rudeness to make them feel stoopid.

Even the least of us will be more expert in some things than others may be. If you have ever had to dig a furrow for a plumber to lay pipes you would realise that even this seemingly simple task is not without its degree of difficulty. The world is full of experts and equally full of people who need help. HELP is a word with far more importance than any other four letter word.

But then, I am no expert.

When I was on a computer course, one "tutor" didn't have the time for anyone, as he put it "I have learnt, so I'll keep what I know". He was reported many times and got moved.

I personally go with "if you don't ask questions, you don't learn" followed by "if I have the advice or an answer, I will pass it on"

ignorance is bliss in some cases and wisdom can not always be achieved by some individuals - it's life

good job I'm a brainy bugger then eh!

I would feel dreadful, Jabs.

If it's any consolation, I think it's the person who was rude to you that deserves pity. What's wrong with him/her is probably permanent.

Don't let this stop you from reaching out for help.
It seems to me that this person is insecure and needed to pump
himself/herself up by making that remark.
I wouldn't fret over it, you know who you are.

*hugs*

That's nasty

The thing is, I deal with beginners all the time, and I try to cheer them up by saying that whatever they're stumbling over is easy once they get familiar with it.

When I've been on the receiving end of such comments, I ignore them because I know that everyone is an expert in some things and a beginner in others. It can't be helped; it's just the way the world is. It helps to have a natural sense of curiosity, becauee this is what drives you to be ever learning more.

Jab, I hope I wasn't the one who made the comment. I usually say things like that to cheer people up, not put them down.

Jabs I would feel very sad and hurt at those type if comments, everyone is different and no-one can be good at everything as we are all unique and our strengths and weaknesses are different for each person.

We also learn in different ways and sometimes it may take longer but we get there in the end.

In the context you describe, Jabs, it sounds rude and out of place. However, I'm with Paul: I would probably say 'it's easy', accompanied by a smile, and an explanation of how to do it. I would mean it encouraging, though, not to put somebody down.

Very Dear Jabs, I too have been on the receiving end of this sort of rubbish. In the last couple of years I've developed a means of dealing with it. I call it the Gentle Jibe. The secret is to tease the provoker until you have had enough fun to feel vindicated. Make it subtle, but make sure you get some fun out of it. It's a way of getting some positives out of a negative, and can be incredibly funny.
It's kind people who get this sort of stuff aimed at them, the perpetrator thinks kind types will just sit back and take it, prove them wrong and they'll take a bit more care in future. Lots of love and hugs Vi xxx

Thanks everybody. A special thanks to Vi, but you're too late, and I don't feel like going on with this individual (it's happened before). See http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/brunel/F2137311?thread=3019564&skip=9760&show=20 9772 and my reply 9773. [I had asked earlier]. After two years nobody at all has stood up for me in that thread, though there were times when only I and one or two others kept the thread going. Makes me feel like giving up altogether, finding something a bit more useful to do. But I wouldn't leave friends such as you lot, although I don't think I'll be quite so involved for a bit. Jabs

I'm glad to see you back, Jabs.

Cheer up, Dear. At least you gave him what for. I'll try and get in there and have a dig at him. Another recent strategy of mine is to give a person 3 chances, Once they've blown the third, I'm off. Lovely to find you're a vegetarian too.(Me too - 40+ years)

Dear Jab,

are you meaning that you will desert as a Master of Ceremonies in the Bad Poetry thread?
and leave YOUR guests alone?

It´s unfair, Flateria will be really sad not to mention Amelia, who is returning from Portugal with new verses...

My dear shepherd, don´t leave your playful herd alone for long.
We will wait for you, You may need a vivificant walk, but don´t stay too far from the computer. For me it´s a window from which I get a lot of pleasure. There´s human warm here, a lot. And it´s helping me. Since I can´t walk, nor work,it´s the only social activity I have, (don´t worry the condition is temporary)
If you leave for too long, the place will be colder.
Have your walk and come back soon, a, warm chat and games (with or without clear rules) are waiting for you.

hasta pronto
Mar


PS: The only rule of the game was broken twice, you pointed to the first, someone told you off, then again, and you were ignored. It´s unfair, I know, particulary because you have showed a lot of tolerance and flexibility in the Bad Poetry thread.

But I wouldn't leave friends such as you lot, although I don't think I'll be quite so involved for a bit.

Huh tsk tsk!
you leave us and my emails will get violentI'll write in upper case

Keeping threads going is a lot of work sometimes. In fact, I just remembered one (called "Nothing at all") that I have neglected for too long.

No chance of leaving such great friends, even though I'm such a sensitive artiste, (poet and tragedian). Don't worry, folks!

It was an awful fiddle trying to recover a thread I've already unsubbed from, Paul It was then that I saw that nobody at all had defended me. I didn't expect them to, really, as I'd unsubbed, but still, it might have been nice. In fact the writer of the next post, which ignored me completely, has been a friend of mine on hootoo for a long, long time.

Regards to all,


Jabs