Journal Entries
Bigdick Tilsen
Posted May 27, 2003
We played some $20 no-limit at Malone’s on a Monday night. Muke and Fritze joined the action. I miss the old chaps I haven’t played with them for a long long time. I don’t really have any stories to tell about my play except: one time I had K3 and I flopped a pair of 3s and 4 of use checked the flop. On the turn Adam bet and to me it looked like an Ace high bet, everyone folded to me and I thought to myself, if I had AK right now I would call. So I called with my 3s. Malone bet a again on the river and I called him again. He mucked his cards. I had a feeling he was trying to take it, and there is nothing wrong with that, but I caught him. The real highlight of the night was how big of a dick Tilsen was being. I am sure he will argue that he was simply being professional, but there is a big difference between that and being a dick. Here let me show you.
1. Tilsen vs. Dix: I don’t remember the hands, but I think it was AK vs AQ and the ace flopped. Tilsen bet with his AK and Dix called with her AQ, Tilsen bet again on the turn and again Dix called. On the river Tilsen checked and Kathrine bet and Tilsen called. Kathrine asked Noah what he had and he said “You have been called, you show first” in a real bigdick tone. She shows her losing hand and he flips up the winner.
2. Tilsen vs. Reebock: This one is just betting and raising the whole way and once again the river comes and Reeback says “what do you have” and Noah says back “No what do you have?” and Reebock says “show it” and Tilsen says “You have been called.” Reebock flips up QQ, and then Tilsen flips up KK and wins.
Why: These are big dick things to do because when someone asks you what you have it’s kind of like showing weakness. Because if they thing they have the best hand then they would simply show it and take the pot down. If they have to ask that must mean that they are easily beat. It’s similar to a slowroll. It’s a very jerk thing to do, especially when you are with good friends. But read on for the real big dick move.
3. Malone vs. Tilsen: The flop is 282 and Tilsen has 88. Hey the top full-house, the only thing that beats him is 22. Malone goes all-in for about $30 and Tilsen thinks for way to long of a time, and says “How much is it.” After Adam counts it and says $33 Tilsen slowly moves all of his chips into the pot and says call and flips up the practical nuts. Malone had KK and is very upset. I was more upset with Tilsens etiquette then anything else. This was a real bigdick thing to do because weather the bet was $33, or $400 Tilsen would have called it. So telling Adam to count the money and then putting his chips in slowly was just an act. I don’t know what the intent was because know was 99% sure he was going to take all those chips anyway. Pondering a call and then asking how much it is and stacking the chips up are all signs of weakness. Because if you have the nuts all you do is say “Call” show them and take the other guys money with no drama. Putting on this “I am weak” act works really well if you are playing. But when it comes to showdown time you are just a jerk.
Other then that, everything was pretty average.
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Latest reply: May 27, 2003
Goofy Card Games
Posted May 25, 2003
At Malone’s party we played a little pineapple. My new favorite game. I don’t think anything happened that was too exciting. I was up 50 for a time, but lost it back down to only 30. But hey if I could win 30 a day I would be rich in no time. More interestingly I would like to tell you about some of the games Me and Noah made up.
Kroznch (Cronch): This is a game I made and it is named after me. It goes like this. The blinds are set at whatever and all players get 2 cards like in hold ‘em. As a matter of fact this game plays completely the same as Hold ‘em except whenever anyone folds instead of going to the muck, the folded cards go face up into the community. So if three people fold preflop then there are already 6 cards out before the flop even comes. As you can probably tell there is allot of raising to fold people out. Position is also very very important. The only catch is, you cannot play the board, you need to use at least one card.
Fajita: This is a game Tilsen invented. Everyone antes. All players get a card face down and the person to the left of the dealer begins the betting. Then after it’s over all players get another card face up. Then the highest card begins the betting. After this the final card is dealt face down and players are not allowed to look at it, they have to pick it up and place it facing away from then on their head. Like Indian poker. Lowest card out now starts the betting. So in the end you end up with 1 card only you can see, one card everyone can see, and the last card that everyone but you can see. It’s a very good game as long as there is nothing reflective around.
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Latest reply: May 25, 2003
I Am Back
Posted May 24, 2003
Hello everyone. Sorry about the sparse updates. I have been upset at cards. Let me give you a quick update of what made me too upset to report. We played no limit at Kosker’s and bad play prevailed. I lost lots of money, then I won some back, then I lost more, then I won it all back and then I lost half of that. I ended up very upset and down 50. Dave Born called a few gutshots and made them and Kosker defended the big blind a couple of times for $8 a pop, and he won as well.
My faith in cards came back during 2-4 Pineapple night. I was about to give cards up for good. I was going to play my best and see how it did. If I lost I would have quit forever. I ended up winning though. So I no longer need to quit cards! That will make some of you happy and some of you unhappy. We all try to quit but you know there are people like Kranz who come to a card game once every 4 weeks. Those are the ones that can quit. The ones like me and a few other lost souls cannot. The ones that have suffered loseing nights of $300, and winning nights or $300, the ones that have their own set of poker chips, those of us who spend $14 on a single deck of plastic cards, those of us who play poker more then 4 times a week, it is not so easy for those to quit. So I am back.
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Latest reply: May 24, 2003
Caribou Tourny
Posted May 20, 2003
Not a very big deal but it is important because I played. I know I said I was quitting but I was in a particularly good mood and so we played. Matt and Brandon Raper were there. There where a few high lights. Matt bluffed me out of a semi-large pot that was a very nice bet. I went all in with 9T and got called by 88. I turned a 9 but Brandon rivered an 8. Those rivers always seem to get me. Of course such things don't upset me, I was of course disappointed that it happened but I have nothing to be angry about, 88 is a very playable hand. Pitts also played even though he also quit. Brandon ended up taking the tourney down, and he played fairly well. Better then many. Nice work.
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Latest reply: May 20, 2003
Crock of Shit
Posted May 19, 2003
What a stupid crock of shit.
“This area is dedicated to board games which is currently replacing poker. I'm taking a break from poker for the same reason some people quit drinking. Some people quit drinking so their [tolerance] level will go back down and then it takes less to get them drunk. Well I quit poker so that my tolerance for beats will go back up so I can suffer more beats and not get as mad.”
Kosker says this in his profile in the board game section. This made me laugh because it’s so stupid. Kosker doesn’t suffer beats. As a matter of fact I cannot think of a recent time when I said “Jeez Kosker that is a real beat…” What I can think of however is saying “Jesus Kosker you really put the beats on Pitts/Wolf/Handsome/King/Reebock/Me.” Koskers experiences lots of beats all right. Like the time he called my pre-flop raise with K6 and preceded to river trips and crack my AA. Or the time Pitts went all in with QQ and Kosker called with JJ and flopped a set of Jack. Or there was also that time when Pitts went $20 all-in with AQ and Kosker made the stupidest all-in call ever with QJ drawing very slim against Pitts yet somehow got bailed out by a full house. Every single time Kosker “defends” the big blind with total shit like 85, 53, J2, 79 and wins the pot with a retarded two pair or strait. Kosker experiences lots of beats that’s for sure, except he is on the delivering end of them all. I hope he never plays cards again.
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Latest reply: May 19, 2003
AlexK the Twelve of Motion
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