h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Ach haud yer wheesht yer limmer, yer blethering shaws yer ken noct binna blether. Yer wirds dinnae mak sinse ye maukit besom!!!!

It's not 'yer', it's 'wor'. Wor getting wor Scottish and wor Geordie mixed up.

Are you? then maybe you should get a geordie-scots dictionary.

Chotto matte Kudusai, 'wor' is 'we' in Yorkshirish. I think 'yee' probably applies in the second participle as well although I think it just 'your' given that has Nordic etomology. Maybe with an emphysis on the 'y' and the 'r'.

Yer is your, we is oo, our is oor.

Oh ah divint nah, they make it up as they go along.

There is this: http://www.newcastlestuff.com/

Did you understand post 101?

Yes you cheeky male chauvanistic git.

Aww, you know you love me really

Do I?

Of course you do, everyone does.

Why is that? Is it because you've been dabbling in the dark arts?

Nah, it's because I'm especialy lovable

Unless your cute, small and furry I don't think you are.

Well cute and furry I can do, but I aitent small...that is to say the phrase "pringles tube" springs to mind

Tut...you're not mock Italian are you?

Nope, but I could wear a wig and put on a fake accent

You mean you're not already?

I do indeed mean such a thing...

..Hello, my name is Carlos. I want to make love to you. I want you to get in the bed and take off your panties, do as I say. Then I want you to pretend that your feet hate each other, do as I say.</>