h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

Lady, it was not a flippant remark. More a recognition of how easy it is to become involved in the lives and pains of others. As you know some past "friends" do.

As you wish, I'll leave.

Hi Paul, good to see you, again. Thank you for your support. It truly has been a long time since those things bothered me.

I can understand some of what your uncle's first wife went through. And, I'm sure that was a long road to recovering and moving onwards.

My mother was a bit different. When I was 14, the doctor told me it was a disease that would not get better, was rare, and they would do what they could for my mother.

I think this is the illness, unless I mispelled it:
http://www.ninds.nih.gov/disorders/picks/picks.htm

Thanks for the link, Evangeline.

I am so sorry that there is no cure.

"There is a strong genetic component to the disease; FTD often runs in families."

I would have suspected that, just from the little you've told me about your other relatives' resistance to facing their problems. You may have been lucky enough to inherit very little of the syndrome, or you've just been blessed with good coping skills. Every little bit helps. Behavior modification and antidepressants are suggested by the link as well.

Then there's the caregiver aspect. Your father had quite a burden. I wonder if his own health was compromised by the long years of caregiving? I know marriage is supposed to be "till death do us part." Still, if your father was doing the lion's share of caregiving, he undoubtedly had major needs of his own, which I hope he was able to satisfy...

Believe me when I say that every family has problems that seem impossibly huge. I don't know where people get the strength to deal with them, but I'm reminded of a folk tale that Michael J Fox relates:
A group of people were brought together and allowed to remove their heaviest burdens, including bad medical conditions, grief over lost loved ones, etc. They put these things in a pile in the middle of the circle. Then, they were instructed to each pick one thing from the pile. Invariably, they took their own burdens back....

I found a link that is a bit more specific the particular disease:
http://www.bhoffcomp.com/coping/picks.html

I'm sure the stress and sheer amount of things to do wore my father very thin.

I watched my father succumb to Parkinson's for about seven years. I don't know how Michael J. Fox manages as well as he does.

As for me, I have not needed anti depressants. I found ways to resolve issues before reaching the point of needing anything beyond drawing, writing, a change of scenery, exercise... pretty much the usual stuff.