h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

That *is* perfect for him. I like the way the 'tiimmm' grows and grows. The next Post installment is on Tuesday 7th, right?

think so. It'll be soon anyways...there was a two week break over xmas..can't rember if that means the new edition is up today or enxt week.

s'up now if yer interested.

I've just had a wave of inspiration ( <--- blue bird of happiness) for the debrief scene for the storytime I'm jotting down some initial ideas in notepad now, I'll probably not get it finished tongith but I'll post it in the add new threads here conversation when it's ready .


Clive.

*drumroll*



The debriefing is finsihed - I'm gonng go run it over to the POST NEW THREADS HERE forum and leave it there for you to see.

Hopefully you'll still be around to see it

*wonders where mr legion has been for the past 5 weeks"

*Staggers in, looking pale and interesting and carrying a distinct odour of Education*

An explanation for my lengthy sabbatical? Well, you remember those evil Life-Changing exams I mentioned a while ago? They are looming pretty damn large at the moment, so I've been in studious mode - unfortunately, to the exclusion of the net. I have my mock exams coming up on the 26th, closely followed by Aurals and Orals and *shiver* I don't want to talk about it I'm sure you, being Learnéd, will understand anyway It's a title I aspire to, but somehow I always seem to end up Boréd.

The debriefing looks great - love the line about an agent having his hands in the casino chips It nicely sets up the next chapter, too - which I am bloody determined to have a hand in, tests or no Now...was I going to do a bit with the demon-kitty, or will we leave it now as it stands?

ah there you is.

ooh yes exams. evil things. Best of luck with those.

As for the leicestercat - well I stuck in a little bit about Guy not having any idea where leicester might be as a sop to that storyline - frankly I'm dying to know what it was you came up with - but either way, it's up to you.

I'm still sending Shazz the rest of the chapters for the post run over - they just gotten as far as rasputin getting the president ('and now over to sam with the sports news')
and I've sent them three more but that's where my advanced coding runs out, so I'll knock a couple of those out , maybe to the finale and get those to her sometime soon.

*THEN* I'll begin work on a holding page/dramatus personae /prologue etc. for Part III Arthur, X and all. (Incidentally I was writing the last of the debrief last night, and I loved the idea of us coming into Arthur and X's story as they flee from *something* - they way Guy could her the wind on the radio and X shouting' they're coming' got a sense of momentum back in there agin...that while we've been having the slowdown so to speak events elsewhere have not. Very nice to write, that. )

Anyhoo, I'm glad you liked it. Took me a while to get it al down on paper but it's doen now.

This has been a fun little escapade.

Cheers for all the laughs.

Clive.

Still revising? or have those 'orrible exams all gone away now?

Anyhoo, I'm just starting to code up the advert for part 3 if you are interested. You can find the (very) early workings of a delusional mind here: A1000152

I trying to make it very James Bond-ish

Any idea if and when we'll see the piece about the Leicestercat (no pressure - heaven knows I was taking long enough! ) s'onlyto give us an idea how much I'll have to get coded up for shazz at the post in time for the finale.

Clive

*prod* *poke*

you alive down there?

Wow, sorry 'bout that. Exams are in about six weeks, and I've just been doing the Mocks, so my attention has been...slightly diverted. Still...here I am, back again...

*Does a little jig*

Anyway, I have a piece written, but I'm not sure it would go well as the *very end*, if you know what I mean I just couldn't think of any suitable closing lines good enough to end the whole Story - it's your baby, maybe you should do it Anyway, here's what I've come up with:

And so, as is appropriate at the end of all stories, the celestial balance has been restored and the Apocalypse neatly sidestepped - but the vigilant reader will no doubt be left with many questions at this point. What has gotten Arthur and X so agitated? What has become of the Leicestercat, and his minion/feeder Tim? What, for that matter, happened to the ill-fated kitty whose mind was transferred into the demon body? Who is Annabel's mysterious superior? What is their nefarious scheme? How were the reviews for Cliff's rock concert? Where will the Robo-Smittington turn up, like a huge, malevolent, battle-armoured bad coin? Who succeeded Rasputin as President of the United States? What happened to Stonehenge which is, after all, a World Heritage site? Will Bob defy god and man and, in fact, get together with Jill?
To shed a little light on these questions, we go to a house.

It was a small, thatched-roof house, more of a cottage really, tucked away from prying eyes on a tree-lined little country lane. In the golden light of evening, clouds of tiny, pointless flies hovered above the fern-lined track and thought their tiny thoughts, mostly concerning reproduction. In the cobbled yard about a dozen cats of all hues sprawled sunbathing, yawning toothily and thinking about food, sex and how exceedingly fine it was to be a cat.
In fact, the only lifeform within a square mile which wasn't currently thinking about propagating their species was Mrs Waverly, and this was because she was eighty-four, arthritic and blind as a dead bat - and apart from a brief, torrid fling with a GI back in the War, her life had been fairly short on passion. Except for her cats, of course. She was pottering about in the shady kitchen, very carefully preparing her supper, when there was a scratching at the door. Pausing to take a carefully-placed kitchen knife in her blue-veined hand (Mrs Waverly had no illusions on the state of the nation, it was a Disgrace, all this crime), she creaked her way to the door and tugged it open.
"Meow."
"That you, Godfrey?" she croaked.
"Me-ow."
"Churchill?"
"ME-OW!"
Waverly cocked her head to one side. "You're new, are you? Well, there's always enough milk and scrapings for another kitty. Coochy coo? Coochy...?"
There was a hiss, and she heard a slicing sound, like a razor-blade sliding through a raw pork chop. She drew back her hand, frowning slightly, then smiled.
"Don't like to be petted, no? Well, never mind. Here you go..."
She tossed out a handful of dry feed, and was gratified to hear a rapid snuffling and gulping, followed by a deep, rattling noise, like a log being sawn in half.

The new cat was purring.

Mrs Waverly smiled again, and closed the door, fumbling for the bolt. Then she went back to her supper.
And that was pretty much the end of it. To Mrs Waverly's relief, the other cats seemed to take to the new one - in fact, they were more quiet than ever - and if there was any cloud on her horizon, it was that the postman hadn't visited in over a month. Probably the postal service, she decided. Another Disgrace.

Hm. That wasn't actually all that helpful, was it? Well, one out of ten ain't bad.


---Maybe you could add some supplementary lines or something

I'll read it now. Just wanted to say howdy and stuff while you were still online.

Tim was busy trying to extracate the desicated corpse of the postman from a branch high up in a great oak that overhung the thatch.

"Poor guy he must have come up here to get away from the cats...they kept him up here till he starved."

Leicester polished off the last cat feed.

"TIiim, We ShAlL Maaake THiiIiS our nEew bAasssE of oPpeRrrations."

"Err...good idea."

"courssse it iiiis."

Tim from his high vantage point on the wodden limb survayed the idyllic peaceful countryside.

Pure yellow sunlight filtered through thick high-branched canopies, a pleasent breeve took and lifted the grasses that wallowed in far fields and on the edge of hearing a small brook babbled and meandered.

Whatever apololypse had been brewing only hours before, it had not apparently touched this quite slice of paradise.

Down on the ground somewhere approaching ankle height, Leicester sat with his head resting on his paws.

Sweet visions of vengence flashed before his eyes.

Seeming to make his mind up about somethign leiscester rolled over and did that funny stretch that cats do.

'Well' he thought. ' a favour is a favour.'

Pasuing only to behead a row of daffodils he troted out of the front gate and went searching for a cow for Mrs Waverly to have for dinner.

Good luck with the exams!!

Thanks I've been getting some mocks results back, and they're pretty encouraging. That said, I need 510+ points to get the course I want, English and History at Trinity College (this will be Difficult). this confounded points system!

How go things with the warlord?

Trinity college?..Oxford?

They go well. Thanks for asking.

Still w**king. saving up to fund a small holiday round the british isles with my girlfriend U50994 this June.

Off to Jamaica on holiday with family this July (looking forward to that? me? nah... )

And then it's off to Warwick uni in September to start my MA in Continental Philosophy.

and if it helps any I don't understand this new points system earlier...I'm starting to shw my age now () but it was all so much simpler when I was doing my A-Levels.

No, in Dublin. It's the only really old college in Ireland, founded by Elizabeth I, I think.
Funny thing about it: under the official college charter, written up sometime in the sixteenth century, it's legal to shoot Catholics from the bell tower

ah...I forgot you were in ireland.


Shooting catholics from the bell-tower? one of those laws they never got round to repealing, huh?

earlier???? either. 'scuse me.


'the hands move but the mind is gone'

Understood Jamaica, eh? As you are not looking forward to it, so I am not envious of you The Storytime seems to be clipping along nicely - I've just been catching up on the back issues. When will the third installment begin?