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I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 1

Amy Pawloski, aka 'paper lady'--'Mufflewhump'?!? click here to find out... (ACE)

Or at least not the closest thing to (competent) next-of-kin...

Daddy Bob's been not doing so well for a while now, and so I get to double-check information I've been given that, yes, he has actually made arrangements for, when, you know... And to see if the information on how his finances are arranged (as in, is he still in control of his own finances, or does he have a payee, and if so, who?..) And, even more fun, I get to figure out how to (probably delegate) the task of avoiding the state from getting everything he has, when... Probably one way to do taht is for Tom and I to get wills, to at least determine who will get Faith is something happens to the both of us, and to point out to Daddy Bob that hey, we've got wills... We've tried talking to him about this stuff, but he changes the subject. And (huge guilt-trip) we've not called him in a while, because he'll stay on the phone just long enough to literally just say hi and bye, so we can't just call him up to do all this.

As to why I'm the closest to competent next-of-kin... I *do* have stepsisters, but I've no idea how to get ahod of any of them, as they've been out of Daddy Bob's life for ages. And my brother, who's actually my half-brother because Daddy Bob's his dad, is legally incompetent because he was born brain damaged--both frontal lobes are atrophied, and one's even detached. (Those of you that have known me a long time know that I once promised to maybe do an entry all about it, and I will, eventually...)


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 2

pheloxi | is it time to wear a hat? |

are you member of The Peter Panners Society A529094

smiley - bigeyes


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 3

Hati

smiley - hug
You are too old to want to be a grown-up. smiley - tongueout
I think I grow old before I grow up anyway.
My grandaunt (89) is just the opposite, she asks us every year and even more often to get checked if her will is still legal and okay or if she should renew it.


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 4

Mr. Christopher, enjoying the Magicians Guild game where he is called Polonius Franc, Elder Healer and local merchant

My grandparents made their wills very specific about finances and funeral arrangements. Then my grandmother held a kind-of open house for family and friends to decide who got what stuff. After the death of my grandfather, I have the painting that hung over his chair and a clock, his pipe, his humidor, a few lighters, and an ashtray that belonged to his mother, as well as a coin collection. Everything was writen down and agreed upon, so we had very little to dispute about after his passing, notable his collection of home movies. I was able to save some, but my mother and aunt distroyed the rest.


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 5

Kaz

Myself and Moonglum are getting everything sorted, havn't paid for anything yet, but we are deciding and planning. My parents and theirs had nothing planned. My dad says he doesn't care what happens he'll be dead. I have told him that is a selfish attitude, as if mum survives him she will be dealing with enough, he should plan now and help her.

Oh well, plan for what you can, just don't think about why you are planning it.


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 6

paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant

I have some rubbish, and I also have some really nice stuff. I don't think either category will appeal to my next of kin. They can sell it all on eBay, and spend the money on whatever they *do* want. smiley - smiley


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 7

Amy Pawloski, aka 'paper lady'--'Mufflewhump'?!? click here to find out... (ACE)

But if you don't have a will, Massachusetts will get most if not all of it...


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 8

Mr. Christopher, enjoying the Magicians Guild game where he is called Polonius Franc, Elder Healer and local merchant

Give them the rubish part.
Or leave it to the library for them to have a garage sale.


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 9

tacsatduck- beware the <sheep> lie

I don't want to be a grownup either...and so far I am hanging in there smiley - winkeye good luck with your smiley - erm father in-law? (I think that is who Daddy Bob would be) and quite frankly whether or not it convinces him that he should think about his passing getting you and Tom's wills and such like together is not a bad idea at all...I know I have my papers together just in case...and when I was in I had a folder with all my instructions and important papers so if I was called away then everything would be taken care of by my family and if while I was overseas something happend to me they would have everything they needed to take care of everything...still have something like that but it's been a while sense I updated it hmmm

I am worried that when my mother passes away it will be up to me to get everything taken care of...my sisters have already picked out everything they want so I am guessing that will go easy...but everything else bills, smiley - erm cremation arangements (she already let me know that is the way she would like to be taken care of...and then I told her about new river gorge in WV and she said that it sounded like the place to sprinkle the ashes) anyways, and the house and all the other stuff ahhhhh...hopefully it will be a long long time before anything has to be done but the way my sisters are now I will have to be the grown up again...and quite frankly it's not fair...they are 10 and 9 years older then me and I have had to be the grown up for wayyyyyy to long smiley - sadface

smiley - chick
(smiley - cuddlesmiley - bunny)


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 10

Amy Pawloski, aka 'paper lady'--'Mufflewhump'?!? click here to find out... (ACE)

Daddy Bob's my stepdad. I'm older than Toby, but my stepsisters are older than me (as well as actually being related)--my oldest stepsister's just a couple years younger than Mom would be.


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 11

tacsatduck- beware the <sheep> lie

ahhhh ok my bad

smiley - chick
(smiley - cuddlesmiley - bunny)


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 12

Evil Roy: Maestro of the Thingite Orchestra, Knight Errant of the Thingite Cause, Prince of Balwyniti, Aussie Researchers A59204

Okay, smiley - erm...... how can I say this nicely........

If Daddy Bob doesn't have a will and isn't willing to organise to have one drawn up, then he's a fool. It is the only way he can be sure that his wishes will be followed. Don't let him change the subject. Point out to him that,as you are a step-child, you would have absolutely no say in what happens after, and/or if, he dies, unless he stipulates it in his will.

smiley - erm Unless it works differently in the States......

While I'm at it, Tom and yourself should also have wills - Faith needs that protection.

It ain't fun, but once it is done you can forget about it until such time as your life circumstances change and you might feel the need to update your wills.

smiley - cheerssmiley - musicalnote


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 13

Amy Pawloski, aka 'paper lady'--'Mufflewhump'?!? click here to find out... (ACE)

I know we should--we've been discussing who we want to have Faith, if, and of course we'll need to talk to the people.

And I have to say that I agree with your opinion of Daddy Bob's stubbornness, but I have a really hard time pushing things with my elderssmiley - erm Heck, even with my peers I tend to back down too easily sometimes! Fortunately for parenting, I have no problem holding firm with kidssmiley - winkeye


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 14

paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant

Amy, I see kindness and gentleness as your biggest strengths. What you need to do is add manipulativeness to the mix. smiley - winkeye Don't worry, there's enough time to learn it. smiley - smiley


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 15

Amy Pawloski, aka 'paper lady'--'Mufflewhump'?!? click here to find out... (ACE)

Oh, you can ask my nephew or some ex-neighbor kids--I'm mean! 'No' means 'no', and 'maybe' turns into 'no' if you bug me about itsmiley - evilgrin


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 16

paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant

Um....erm......I can't ask your nephew, Amy. smiley - erm

If you're mean, you've kept your meanness well-hidden on Hootoo. Not that I want you to change. smiley - blush


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 17

tacsatduck- beware the <sheep> lie

smiley - laugh

smiley - chick
(smiley - cuddlesmiley - bunny)


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 18

paulh, vaccinated against the Omigod Variant

You don't need to change either, Tac. smiley - smiley


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 19

tacsatduck- beware the <sheep> lie

smiley - cool

but he will not change will smiley - erm have problems later on or something

smiley - chick
(smiley - cuddlesmiley - bunny)


I don't want to be a grownup :-(

Post 20

PaperKid

Mommy, if you're not a grownup, who'll take care of me?smiley - wah


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