h2g2 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: Earth Edition

The battle lines between good and evil were starkly drawn in last night's dream: There is a worldwide audition call for an actor to play Pope Helmut in a movie. This rouses the Devil himself, who as coincidence would have it is also named Helmut. In a scene very much like Disney's depiction of Mussorgsky's "Night on Bald Mountain,"
Helmut the Devil comes to life where he has been sleeping as a mountain top. "They want Helmut?" he roars. "*I* will give them Helmut."

He comes down from the mountain and begins terrorizing everything that is holy. In particular, he zeroes in on the world's most saintly man, who is a bishop named Brendan. Brendan appears,
radiant and formidable in blue robes, a long white beard, a strong and resolute expression on his face, and a beam of light from the heavens that lights up the halo that is around his head. He appears
on the side of the mountain, ready to vanquish Helmut the Devil or die and go straight to heaven.

Meanwhile, Helmut the Devil has gone to have some fun terrorizing the countryside. He pops in on a party at a swimming pool, threatening to devour Martha Stewart, who is relaxing in the pool with a in her hand and a bathing suit in designer colors. Martha is scared but not hurt as Helmut goes to bother someone else, and the party gets back to normal.

Typical day at the Paulh homestead....

You have GOT to stop eating angel food cake before bed...

"...and the party gets back to normal."

yeah right

do you take requests? if so i would like a dream where martha stewart co-hosts a party with hugh hefner

Cool dream.

yeah, i'm thinking of pirating the movie rights to paulh's dreams

If you want a dream about Martha and Hugh, then Hugh are going to have to dream it yourself.



I just set off the Niagara Falls routine.

Step by step, inch by inch...