Journal Entries
The Movie!!!
Posted Apr 7, 2005
I just saw an ad for the HHGTTG movie on Cartoon Network. Says it will premier April 29th. I'm so excited!
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Latest reply: Apr 7, 2005
Angry Host
Posted Dec 30, 2004
Tips For Stupid People
on how one should act civilized:
Upon entering the home of a friend/co-worker or henceforth known as Host, do not immediatly light up a cigarette. Instead, be keenly observant:
A) Are there people inside already smoking? If yes, smoke and enjoy. Of not, see B.
B) Are there ash trays present? If yes, see C. If no, these people may not be smokers and maybe you should take your cancer sticks outside.
C) Are those ash trays in easy access and/or in use? Or have they been placed there as one would place a delicate crystal bud vase, ie pretty to look at but not to touch? If still unclear, see D.
D) Ask, you stupid numb-chuncks! Ask the host if it's OK to befoul their air, or maybe the host is distracted with those choking, gagging sounds he/she may be making!
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Latest reply: Dec 30, 2004
Julia Child, 1913-2004
Posted Aug 13, 2004
Julia passed away in her sleep last night. The American-born chef who made French cooking approachable for the last forty years will be remembered at the Smithsonian Institute that has recently installed her kitchen in the museum.
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Latest reply: Aug 13, 2004
She sure does...
Posted Apr 12, 2004
If you follow this link, http://home.nc.rr.com/albalane/page-links.html, it takes you to a page where you can hear a really funny song about Condi Rice and the 9/11 commission.
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Latest reply: Apr 12, 2004
The Friday From The Black Lagoon
Posted Mar 20, 2004
The story, with much backstory...
On Monday, I had oral surgery to remove two twisted wisdom teeth so by Friday I was/is malnourished and in pain. The surgen prescribed some powerful pain-killers. When I woke up that Friday, I was hurting so much I took two pills and fell asleep until eleven o'clock when the phone rang. I got out of bed, answered the phone, and found it to be a RECORDING of a telemarketer! OK, since I was awake I began to do my daily tasks. I am going to an important dinner party witht he newspaper editors in mid-april and needed to find an original gift to give to the host couple, both doctors and VIPs at my college (and they are serving us bear and elk that they killed themselves). My mother pointed out to me that the Passaic County Historian, who has an office in the castle I work in as asistant curator, was having a booksigning on Friday evening.
I thought that a signed book would be perfect, but I didn't know the first names of the couple. I then spent a half hour on the internet trying to find their names; first I e-mailed an urgent query to a fellow guest, then I reviewed some old e-mails and found the names, so I sent the other guest an apology.
I was all set to go to the book signing. My mother came home early because we had to make two other stops; my best friend and I had planned to do something this week (spring break) and he called me today to say that we would be going to see his friend in Brooklyn, but not until after his little siste's birthday party, which I was invited to so I had to get a gift. Also, I needed to rent the movie Dante's Peak and watch it for Geology Class (to point out the accuracy/inaccuracy). So off we, my mother and I, drove to the Castle to the book signing.
When we arrived, there was only one other car in the parking lot. We got out and discovered that the lights were all off and the doors locked. Confused, I called the castle phone and got the message that due to inclement weather, the castle was closed and the book signing was postponed until the end of April, ONE WEEK AFTER the dinner party, probably to acomindate the brass band that was to play that evening. So then twenty other cars pulled up and we had to explain that I had called and the event was cancelled and that no one had bothered to put a sign on the door. Strangest of all, the event was canceled due to snow, which by 6:30 that evening (the book signing started at 7) had all melted.
So then my mother and I drove back, stopping on the way at Barned and Noble to buy a book for my friend's sister. We hunted for 45 minuted before I called my friend to find out how old the girl was (7) and then I bought a double-bound edition of Alice in Wonderland and Alice Through the Looking Glass. I walked up to the cashier and asked for it to be wrapped. She then said, "No", but then started laughing and told me it was a joke. I apologized for the rude way I had asked for the wrapping paper and told her the events of the day and we laughed and that was nice.
So we drove home because I had forgotten the Blockbuster coupon (99c) and then to Blockbuster to rent Dante's Peak. After a mis-shelving incident, I brought the DVD home and prepared to E-mail the Historian to have him sign a book ahead of time that my parents would buy for me and ship to me in NB.
So here I am, almost out of pills and in great face-pain. Still, it was not a bad day.
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Latest reply: Mar 20, 2004
Mr. Christopher, enjoying the Magicians Guild game where he is called Polonius Franc, Elder Healer and local merchant
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