Journal Entries

And then...

Some days I'd like to be all like, "Turn and face me, coward!"

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Latest reply: Jan 7, 2005

Seagulls

A seagull in flight is a wonderous sight.
He soars with the greatest of ease.
Using his wings like a sail, his jib is his tail,
As he rides up and down on the breeze.

A seagull afloat is like a small boat;
His lines are smooth and so clean.
He sounds a hoarse note. Water glides off his coat,
And his bill keeps him shipshape and preened.

But a seagull on land is like a boat up on stands.
His legs are far, far too small.
It seems with a hand from the wind he would land
On his butt from a terrible fall.

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Latest reply: Dec 14, 2004

Happy Hollandaise

Some people say that shopping online is easier than scrabbling through the hustle and bustle to steal the last Tickle-Me Elmo from some haggard soccermom who's been up since four. They're right. Except I just spent $150 of my grandmother's money online to buy presents for my entire family (including myself) while she commanded me from the other room. That's a little stressful too. I'm going to take a bath.

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Latest reply: Dec 13, 2004

Philosophy

Descartes walks into a bar.
The bartender says, "Hey, Rene. Get you a beer?"
Descartes says, "I think not," and disappears.

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Latest reply: Dec 12, 2004

On my cat, Lefty

I marvelled at my cat today. While I wrote an email, he climbed up in my lap and started licking his genitals. I wish I had his self-confidence. Some day I will be able to crawl in some one's lap and lick my genitals. That will probably take some serious stretching excercises before-hand.

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Latest reply: Dec 11, 2004


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Lochinvar

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